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I was just starting to feel more confident that I could, indeed, handle the baby by myself for the evening. What I wasn’t sure I could handle was this attraction to my twenty-eight-year-old nanny.
CHAPTER11
QUINCY
My younger siblings, Molly, Brayden, and Hannah—or half-siblings technically—were the easiest babysitting job ever. Brayden had been at a friend’s house all evening, studying for a test tomorrow, until bedtime, so I’d barely seen him. Hannah’s cross-country meet had run late, and she’d only gotten home an hour ago. And now that Molly was eleven, she could take care of herself, liked to help cook dinner, and preferred doing things like hair and nails instead of playing with stuffed animals or Barbies.
Tonight she’d insisted on doing my hair. As I’d learned in the recent past, having this dear tween girl do my hair was a colorful, creative event. I currently had no less than a dozen-and-a-half tiny braids on the right front side of my head, each of them with several tiny multicolored butterfly clips spaced out down the length. It looked like a cross between dreadlocks and toddler gone wild, but each time I caught a glimpse of the colorful clips, my heart warmed with love for the girl with the unique way of expressing her creativity.
The younger two were asleep now, Molly since nine and Brayden for over an hour, as it was approaching midnight and they both had school tomorrow. Hannah was in her room on the lower level and quiet, probably trying to catch up on homework. I was in the living room of the split-level house I’d lived in since I was eleven, when my dad had married Cynthia. I wouldn’t say it felt homey to me, because nothing had really felt like home since my mom had died, but it was familiar and comfortable.
Stretched out on the couch, I’d been bingeing a show, but for the past half hour or so, I’d been restless. Antsy. I normally didn’t care how late my dad and Cynthia came home, but tonight, I wanted to get back to Knox’s to make sure he was doing okay with Juniper.
He was starting to get the hang of baby care and becoming more confident. To be honest, I was still shook by my spontaneous hug earlier. Throwing my arms around him was a gut reaction, a line I never would’ve crossed if I’d stopped to think it through. My body’s response to him had been undeniable and not at all nanny appropriate. It’d been all I could do not to either kiss him or make a hasty, obvious retreat.
I knew those inklings were ill-advised, and I wouldn’t act on them, but I still felt compelled to check on him and Juniper. I’d taken my phone out numerous times tonight, about to send a message asking how he was, but I’d managed to quash the urge each time. He was my employer after all.
My restlessness wasn’t only about Knox. I was getting attached to Juniper as well, for better or worse. She was such a good baby, especially considering what she’d been through in her short life. She seemed to have made the transition to Knox pretty well and a lot faster than I’d expected. It made me wonder what kind of care she’d gotten before. I hated to think Knox’s ex might’ve been less than adequate as a parent, but I couldn’t deny I had questions.
At ten till midnight, I heard the garage door open and my dad’s truck pull in. I flipped the TV off, hopped up, and got my jacket on. When my dad and Cynthia came through the door, I was standing in the kitchen waiting for them.
Cynthia said a distracted, “Hi, Quincy,” then breezed past me.
“Hi, honey.” My dad came over and kissed the top of my head. “You in a hurry or something?”
“No,” I lied. “Just tired.”
“You’re always welcome to sleep here, you know,” he said as he set his award plaque on the counter.
“Congrats on the award, Dad. You deserve it.” I hugged him and didn’t respond to the part about sleeping here. I knew I was welcome as far as he was concerned, but now that I had a choice, I didn’t care to wake up to Cynthia.
“Aww, thanks. It’s nice to be recognized. In the end, it’s just back to the grind tomorrow, I guess.” He shrugged humbly. “I need to replace a lightbulb out front before I forget.” He went into the pantry to get a bulb.
Cynthia poked her head around the doorway to the living room, glancing up the stairs to Molly’s and Brayden’s rooms. “Are they asleep?”
“Long ago,” I assured her. “Hannah got home about ten thirty. She said she had biology homework to do.”
Cynthia looked semi-appeased.
“You be safe going home, honey,” my dad said as he went out the door to the garage, bulb in hand. “See you soon.”
“Night, Dad.”
“What did Molly do to your hair?” Cynthia asked, her eyes widening as she looked me over.
“She called it an experiment.” I grinned, flipping the ends of the curled side and ignoring my stepmom’s distaste. “Sorry to rush out, but I need to get back.”
Cynthia frowned. “In a hurry to get back to that man?”
“What?” I sputtered in disbelief. I mean, there was maybe a minor attraction to Knox, but no one knew about it, and no one ever would. He was older than me, a lot older, and he was my boss, not my crush.
Mostlynot my crush.
He wouldnotbe my crush.
The point was that Cynthia had no reason to say such a thing other than she was determined to undermine me always. She had the power to bring out my self-doubt like nobody else. Yes, my insecurities were mine, but she knew the buttons to push. She had since she and my dad had married.
“He’s a handsome man. You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed. It’s a cozy setup you have there,” she continued.
