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“I’m not,” he grinned and kissed her forehead once again.
And just like that, all the worry she had was gone. Keaton Savage was a tonic to her anxiety. A balm to her nervousness. And a really, really,reallygood kisser.
22
“What is goingon with you and the new chick?” Harlan asked Keaton as the men all waited in the holding room for the ball. “You like her, don’t you?”
No.He loved her. Instead of announcing his feelings for her to Harlan, which he thought might be bad form considering he hadn’t even told her, he just answered with a simple nod.
Keaton hadn’t had a second alone with Avery since their kiss in the tower three days ago. He’d considered going down the not-giving-a-fuck route and talking to her in front of Zara, the cameras, the crew, whoever and telling her that he wanted to be with her, but until he knew exactly why she was on the show, he didn’t want to do that.
She’d been engaged up until a few weeks ago, and he wasn’t sure where her head was at. Also, he knew how much she hated attention being on her, and he was pretty sure she’d hate him making a public display of announcing his feelings for her.
All he needed was five minutes alone with her so he could find out what in the actual fuck was going on. Did she still want to keep what was going on between them and their past secret? Did production know that they’d had a relationship years ago that had recently rekindled? If he outed them, would that jeopardize her reasons for being on the show?
He’d overheard Ivy and Iris talking in their ‘twin talk,’ which was a language they’d made up but was pretty close to Pig Latin, about contestants getting food poisoning or who were actually poisoned or something. He didn’t understand all of what they said, because it was a made-up language, but he definitely heard the word poison more than once.
That made him wonder if Avery was a last-minute sub. It was the only scenario that made any sense to him as to why she was on the show. He knew how close she and Sabrina were. He remembered her telling him when he first met her that Sabrina was her college roommate and that she was how the Fairytale Love thing had happened in the first place.
If Sabrina asked her to go on the show as a favor, Avery would do it even if she hated every second. Intuitively he knew that was the sort of person she was. She’d do anything for the people she cared about.
But that hypothesis was basically just a guess. Keatonneverbased decisions on guesses. Especially life-altering decisions like declaring his undying love to someone. He wanted facts. And those were something he was only going to have once he spoke to her, which Zara was not letting happen.
She’d been less than thrilled at Avery’s I’ll-slay-my-own-dragon “stunt” as she called it. He’d had the opposite reaction. He’d thought it was a ballsy move and one that he really admired. Avery was a badass, he’d known that from the first second he’d seen her when she’d been facing down that coyote.
When Iris told him what she’d asked, that she wanted him to be in the tower, Harlan had covered his mouth and said, “Oh shit, dude,” like it was a bad thing. Like he should feel emasculated by it. But Keaton had been more than happy to be rescued by her, even though he knew he’d get shit about it, like he had from his castmates. And he was sure that some neanderthal, backward-thinking, misogynistic assholes in the sport he loved would have a lot more than two cents to say about it. But he didn’t care. He thought it was badass. And the fact that she had the fastest time, beating him by four seconds had just been icing on her badass cake.
“There’s definitely going to be another exile tonight,” Vic predicted.
The last time the subject of being exiled had been brought up, Keaton had offered himself up as tribute. He’d been itching to get the hell off the show. That was before Avery joined the cast.
Now he wanted to stay as long as she was there. Unless there was a chance they could both get exiled, then he’d want that to happen. But the thought of her being on the show, being matched up with someone else, and him watching from home sat in his stomach like three-week-old sushi.
* * *
“Sit down, lovely,” Jessa patted her chair. She was going to do Avery’s hair and makeup for the ball.
It was so good to see a familiar, friendly face. Avery wanted to hug her. The past four days she’d barely gotten a chance to speak to Keaton. The only time the men and women were together was when cameras were rolling. And after the kiss in the tower, Zara had been keeping a tight rein on him.
When she agreed to do this, Avery thought she would see more of Sabrina, but she hadn’t seen her at all. She was thinking about why she hadn’t last night in bed, which she shared with Sienna because they were the two unmatched ladies, and she realized her bestie was probably keeping her distance so it didn’t appear that there was favoritism.
She’d been allowed to speak to Jacob each night. He seemed to be having fun with his dad and Celeste, but he did start crying last night because he missed her and her mom. It had broken her heart, but she was actually glad she had the show to distract her. If she was left to her own devices, she probably would have spiraled into a bottle of wine, pint of Ben & Jerry’s Half-Baked, entire bag of Pirate’s Booty a day habit. Which would have made the fifteen-pound weight gain she’d had over the past five years, double by the time her son came home.
This was better. Being on the show was better. Plus, having Keaton brush his hand against her thigh, or arm, or whisper how good she looked in stolen moments was really working for her. She hadn’t thought she could be more attracted to him, but after spending the past few days covertly flirting, she was so turned on she was scared the second they were alone, she was going to attack him.
“How are things going?” Jess asked as she pulled a paddle brush through her hair.
“I have no idea. The past week has been sort of a blur.” Seven days. That’s how long she’d been on the show. She couldn’t believe it; it had flown by.
“But you’re doinggood, right? Youlikebeing here, right? I bet yourfavoritewas the Knight in Shining armor challenge.” Jessa winked at her as she emphasized the words good, like, and favorite.
For a second, Avery was confused by her series of nonsensical statements, but then she realized that Jess was probably trying to send her a message. The cast was in “the bubble.” They were forbidden to have any access to the outside world and find out how they were being perceived by the public. She realized this was Jess’s way of telling her that she must be doinggoodwith the public, peoplelikedher, and that the Knight in Shining Armor challenge was a viewerfavorite.
Avery smiled and nodded her head. “Yeah, that challenge was fun.”
She hadn’t even thought about the public perception of her. Probably because popularity was not her motive for being on the show. Or, for anything in her life, really. But being cut off from the world, especially social media, bothered some people here more than others.
Zara, who was clearly there to play the game and play it well, did not handle the isolation well. It drove her crazy. She hated not knowing how she was being portrayed or what the public thought of her. Piper was equally obsessed with the public vote but for a totally different reason. She was worried about being liked so she didn’t get exiled and could stay in the castle because she wanted to keep getting to know Vic. Freya hoped she’d reached a million Instagram followers because she wanted to start a nonprofit for foster kids. As a police officer, she’d seen how hard their lives were in care and then when they aged out. And all Sienna had talked about regarding the public was that she hoped they matched her with Luca.
