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Master gave my neck a soft lick, sending a wave of need through me. “Are you worrying about annoying me?”
Kind of.
Nodding was difficult but he didn’t seem surprised.
Master just kissed me again and immediately transitioned to fixing the problem. “Then we’ll set up a calendar, something like you have for work where your students know when they can come to you and when you can’t be interrupted.”
Oh.
“I’ll block out the times when I know I won’t have the time or mental bandwidth to dominate you in that way.” Master started kissing back up my neck and the distraction made it hard to sort through what he’d said. “Then we’ll work out more subtle ways for me to be your Dom in those times or that can be time when you’re able to make orgasm decisions on your own.”
Bandwidth?
Subtle domination?
“Your brain seems to be running in circles. What are you thinking?” He sounded so relaxed that his just barely curious tone didn’t add worrying to the hurricane in my head.
“About the bandwidth comment and the subtle domination, Master.” I had to fight to keep track of the words as his hand moved down to caress my chest. “I… Yes, that. I don’t understand.”
I might if I could function…but processing the idea was difficult at the moment.
He made a low hum, somewhere between a thinking sound and just acknowledging what I’d said. “Do you know the spoons analogy people use when they’re talking about mental health?”
Having to focus on the transition had some of the hurricane slowing so I could sort through it. “Yes.”
“Think of it that way then. Sometimes I just won’t have the spoons to be an active Dom at that moment. It might be for a variety of reasons. Those are times we can either not have BDSM dynamics in our relationship or we can have standard rules that are our base-level plan.” Kissing along my jaw, he brushed his lips against mine before he eased back.
“This is just a random example, but if we discovered that from two to four on my workdays I’m too busy to respond to texts and work has to be the primary focus, then you’ll know that at those times you’ll fall back on our regular rules and what the standards will be for those times.” His completely casual way of seeing us as a couple made me want to smile.
“We might say that edging yourself will always be okay during those times but you only get one orgasm a week.” He had shock going through me and I could feel my eyes going wide. He chuckled, clearly aware of how he’d surprised me. “If we have strict rules for your orgasms and how you can pleasure yourself, or you might just be allowed to practice your oral skills on a dildo, but you couldn’t touch your cock. See? There are always ways to feed your inner needy attention whore side.”
As I was just stunned stupid—and really turned on—Master gave me a quick kiss. “We just need to figure out how much domination you want and where the happy medium will be for us.”
It was so logical and erotic that I almost missed an important part.
“Master, how much of my submission do you want?” Had he mentioned that? “What would you prefer?”
A sheepish smile flashed across his face making me want to lean in and kiss him that time. “I’m falling into a mental pattern of…let’s call it helicopter domination and I’m going to work on that. Since it seems like I’m leaning toward the impractical side of the spectrum when I think about our relationship, I’m going to need your help so I don’t make you uncomfortable.”
It was a very polite way of saying he wanted to take over my life.
Aww.
Master wanted to be my Master or Daddy all of the time.
“I…I’ll try hard to be a good helper.” Ugh, I shouldn’t lie to Master. “But…but I kind of like how Malcolm is always Jack’s Daddy and Dom. So, I might have to work hard at remembering we need balance.”
Or limits?
There might’ve been a better word but I couldn’t find it fast enough.
Master chuckled, but he looked pleased, not like he thought I was silly. “Oh, don’t tell me that. You’re just going to feed the irrational Dom inside who wants to hover over you.”
I was having a hard time remembering why that would be a bad thing.
“We’re…we’re supposed to want balance, right?” I thought that was an appropriate response but Master frowned.
“I think I’m supposed to say yes, but I had a very hard time not texting you too much over the last few days and I kept wanting to ask you what you were doing.” He almost looked like he wanted to pout before he took a deep breath. “But I don’t want to walk all over your boundaries and drive you crazy.”
