Page 16 of Facing the Pain

“Answer the question, Deacon. If there is any love for me at all in your heart, please, tell me the entire truth,” I beg.

“Nothing has changed, Eve, I love you and I love our family. Alright, I have things I need to tell you, but I was going to tell you today anyway. I want you to be my wife and I was going to come clean about everything before I proposed, before we make it legal,” Deacon tells me as he moves closer to me. I step back from him.

“Tell me now.” I can’t get anything else out. My mind won’t focus. The man I have come to love more than life itself in the last two years and the club that has become my family lied to me. Why? I have nothing to give them. They have nothing to gain.

“Sit down, this will take a little bit. You look like you’re going to fall. Babe, I love you. Please just sit and listen.” I move further away from Deacon and sit on one of the leather couches. Garner, Deacon and the three men that I met yesterday, all follow me. The rest of the club brothers spread out throughout the room. “Tell me.”

“The wreck you were in that night was meant for me. I was being chased by one of our rival clubs. I swerved but the suburban behind wasn’t fast enough to miss you. When I met you in the hospital, I had no idea who you were. Horn ran your prints and we found out before you left the hospital. I was attracted to you the first time I set my eyes on you and there is no lie in that.” Deacon stops and I look up into his eyes and see the truth there, or am I seeing what I want to see? “The amnesia was all on the up and up. The club made sure you had the best doctors. We also knew where you came from, but we had no idea why you were on the run. Horn found out that you had ties to Jules and Duke from the Rival Sins MC south chapter. Jules is the man that I grew up thinking was my father and Duke is my brother. I found out Jules wasn’t my father. We had a falling out and I left the Rival Sins MC and came here. Garner and Kentucky are my blood uncles on my mom’s side of the family, and they let me join the Sons of Wrath.” Deacon stops and looks at me. “When Horn found out that you could be Duke’s woman and you were running, all I wanted to do was protect you and Stormy. Neither of those men should ever touch someone as good as you or your child. I wouldn’t let that happen. The gun was found, and I have it in my safe at home but by that time, I already knew who you were.” Deacon and every Sons of Wrath member lied to me. They lied to my face every day I was here. I am so confused. Why? Why would anyone mess with someone’s life that way? Does Deacon love me or is it a power play with his dad and brother?

“Charlie, you may not remember that I am your brother but trust me. The night you left, your only agenda was to get you and your child away from Duke. Duke and Jules were trying to make a power play to take the club away from Dad and you were determined to stop it.” I look at the man’s patch on his cut. His name is Sinister. This is all too much. I hear Stormy waking up on the monitor and I know I don’t want my daughter hearing any of this. I pick the monitor up.

“I don’t know what to think of any of this. I need time to think and I need to get Stormy up and give her a snack. I would appreciate it if none of this is discussed in front of my daughter,” I tell the men who all have their eyes on me.

“Our daughter,” Deacon speaks up. I say nothing but look at the man I don’t even know anymore. The only thing running through my head is all the lies.

“After I feed Stormy, I am going to take her home for the night. I would appreciate it if you would give me some space to get this all straight in my head. I would like for you to stay at the clubhouse until I do that.” Deacon is shaking his head.

“Nope, not doing that. That house is our home, and I don’t care if you want me sleeping on the sofa, but I will be staying under the same roof as my family. You’re pregnant with our child and you never take care of yourself when you are worried about something else. I will be there to take care of what is mine, end of story.” Deacon is determined. I hear it in his voice.

“We won’t be leaving town until this is taken care of,” Tracker says with just as much determination. I don’t wait for anyone else to say anything. I walk away from them all and leave them watching me walk away. I walk down the dark halls to the brother’s rooms. They need to add some lighting down this hall.

I walk in the door and I see Stormy sitting up in her toddler bed. I need time to settle this all in my head before I try to explain everyone to my daughter. I see her bag sitting beside her bed and I walk over to it and look inside and then go to the drawers on the dresser and stuff the bag full of clothes for both of us. I grab my purse. I know I don’t have a lot of cash in my purse but enough for a room for a couple of days. I was running when I arrived here and looks like I’ll be running when I leave.

I change Stormy and grab her sippy cup. I open the door to the hall and it’s clear. I pick up Stormy, my purse, and our bag and I sneak out the door at the end of the hall. I see my car and it only takes a few minutes for me and Stormy to be in it and on our way. I drive into town and pull into a parking lot. I get out and crawl under the car, and it doesn’t take long to find two trackers. I get them off the car and throw them as far as I can. I get back in the car and take the battery out of my phone. I keep telling myself this will only be for a couple of days and I hope that will be it. I look at Stormy and she is as happy as she can be playing with the toys on her car seat. How did I get us into this? I turn my stereo up and listen toTheWheels on the Bus. It’s mindless music that will keep my daughter entertained so I can think.

My mind can’t process everything as fast as I try to figure it all out. I’m going to be branded as a whore. I’m having children with brothers. Am I Eve or am I Charlie as Tracker said? Does my family love me and who is my real family? There are too many questions and “Facing the Pain” is too hard. No, I will be“Stepping Away from the Pain”, even if it is for a little while.

The End