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“That’s the power of mesmerization,” I said. “And that’s it’s limits.”
For a long moment, we just stared at each other, both frozen in place, him still pulled partly back and me stiff and straight. I saw the emotions growing in his eyes, though, the shock replaced with horror and something even worse—fear.
“I’m sorry!” The words jumped out of me. “I should have used a more innocent example. I just wanted you to see…But I shouldn’t have done that to you.”
More than earlier, I wished I could take it all back. I wanted to turn back time and never have Nik look at me like he was afraidof me.
The increasingly frantic tone of my voice propelled him back into movement. He wrapped me in his arms, murmuring against my hair.
“Shhh. It’s all right. It’s all right, Delphine.”
When I calmed, we both pulled slightly apart so we could look at each other.
“I’m sorry,” I said more calmly. “That was cruel.”
“No.” He shook his head. “I understand why you did it. I still can’t believe I just…I didn’t even question…But it was true. I felt it with such certainty.”
I nodded, letting out a long shaky breath. “That’s what it’s like. I can’t control you directly—if I tried to tell you to kill Ember yourself, you’d never do it. But just think of all the ways I could manipulate you.”
Nik went still, his arms still partially around me, his face stricken. “They might not be able to tell me to kill Ember, but if Grey mesmerized me into believing you were dead, someone might die at my hands.”
I stilled as well, frozen for a moment, before I pushed him away.
“Nik! How could you say that?” But one look at the dangerous expression on his face made me go quiet.
“I’m not saying I’m proud of it,” he said hoarsely. “But I really don’t know what I’d do if someone killed you, Delphine.”
“Shh.” This time it was my turn to comfort him, pulling him close. “No one’s going to kill me. I’m a healer, remember?”
He put one arm around my back and tangled the other in my hair, pressing my head against his shoulder.
“They’d better not try.”
I shook my head against him. “You should try to be a little less bloodthirsty, you know. No matter what happens to me, it isn’t worth making yourself into a monster.”
“Why would it matter?” The quiet volume of his words did nothing to disguise their bitterness. “Without you, I would have nothing.”
I sat up straight. “That’s not true!”
“It isn’t?” He arched an eyebrow. “Enlighten me. What would be left to me in a world without you? I spent a year wandering the kingdom alone before I met you, so I know exactly what that life is like.”
“But why do you have to be alone?” I asked, finally asking the question that had been burning in me for so long. “You have a family, and from what Amara and Hayes have said, they miss you. And you’re a prince. I’m sure your old master would take you back and let you complete your apprenticeship like Serena is doing.”
“My family were the ones to reject me,” he said harshly. “They’ve made it clear there’s no place for me at court.”
“But how can that be?” I asked. “Are you sure—?”
“Of course I’m sure!” He laughed darkly. “The Triumvirate cut me out of the line of succession. It’s not something that can be taken back. At least before, when Gia was crown princess, I had a purpose of sorts. I was the spare, in case anything ever happened to her. But now I’m nothing at all. My cousin, Evermund, will be king one day in my place, and there’s nothing at all I can do about it.”
I knew there had been a change in succession, but I had never understood why or the details of it.
“Your father just let them do that?” I asked, still unable to believe it. “Surely they can’t just—”
“Actually they can,” he said, cutting me off coldly. “My father can’t rule without the Triumvirate, and he can’t interfere in this law. It’s an old one, from the beginning of both the throne and the Guild. The Triumvirate have always been against me from the beginning. Even when I tried to do everything they asked of me, they always had an excuse for why I’d done the wrong thing. Evermund will be king, and I will be nothing.”
“Your parents must have been devastated,” I whispered, trying to imagine how it would feel to have your children swept aside by forces outside your control.
Nik chuckled darkly. “That just shows you don’t know my family at all.”
