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She sucked in a breath. “I know it’s stupid for me to be afraid and nervous. I mean, I love them so much and I know they love me. They’ve shown me nothing but support and caring. I couldn’t have ever asked for a better family. I guess I just don’t want to let anyone down. Especially myself and our baby. ”
Dillon touched her cheek and then leaned in to kiss her softly on the lips. “Never that, Lily. You won’t disappoint them or us. We couldn’t be prouder of you. ”
She dove into his arms, wrapping herself around him to hug him tight. He curled his arms around her and held her just as tightly.
He smoothed her hair and then murmured close to her ear, “What do you say we go have the best Christmas Eve this family’s ever seen?”
CHAPTER 17
CHRISTMAS Eve was always a big event in the Colter household. Not that Christmas Day was completely overlooked, but Christmas Eve was full of excitement. It was when the family gathered, drank hot chocolate in front of the fire, and laughed and loved as they celebrated another year.
Christmas Day they would sleep in, eat breakfast in their pajamas, open presents, and then everyone would watch the Christmas parades and football until they ate a midafternoon Christmas dinner.
This Christmas Eve, just as the sun went down, bathing the fresh covering of snow in the first pale shadows of dusk, the Colters and Wilders gathered at the Colter cabin.
Presents were piled around the tree and spilled onto the hearth. The living room was aglow with twinkling lights and the sounds of laughter and happiness.
Holly sat at the end of the couch, propped with pillows and fussed over endlessly by her husbands and children alike. Adam and Ryan disappeared frequently into the kitchen along with Dillon as they cooked the Christmas Eve feast.
And what a feast it was.
The table had been extended over the years, leaves added as the family grew in number. As they gathered at the table, Lily smiled a soft, secret smile, imagining her own addition to the Colter family who would arrive a few months down the road.
This was her child’s future. This family. This wonderful, loving group of people who had hearts as big as the Rocky Mountains.
She was going to be okay. Her child was going to be okay.
She could be happy. Fear uncoiled its tight grip around her heart and slid away, replaced by peace and overwhelming joy. And gratitude. For this second chance—at love, at a life, to have another child to love and cherish.
She glanced at her husbands as they sat down, her heart swelling with love and excitement. This was her moment. Her time to shine. After so long in the shadows, afraid to step into the sun, she was ready to burst out, throw her arms wide, and turn her face up to the wonder of heaven and glory in God’s mercy and grace.
Dillon reached underneath the table to squeeze her hand. Then Seth reached for her other hand, his fingers laced tightly with hers. Across the table, Michael met her gaze and smiled, his eyes suspiciously bright. It was time.
Lily took in a deep breath to steady her nerves. It wasn’t that she had doubts—she didn’t. But she knew their news would concern her parents-in-law. They all knew of her past tragedy. They constantly surrounded her with love and unconditional support. She didn’t want them to worry that she’d fall apart. This family made her strong. With them behind her, she could do anything.
She very carefully disentangled her hands from her husbands’ and then rose, tall and strong, and stared down the table at the rest of the family, who were seated.
Conversation died and the room went silent. All eyes were on Lily as if they realized that something big was about to happen. Holly’s eyes flashed with concern and Lily saw her reach for Ethan’s hand automatically.
Lily smiled, unsure whether she’d even be able to get this out without becoming a blubbering mess. Her eyes already stung and she fought to know just how to begin.
Then beside her, Seth stood, reaching for her hand. He gave her a reassuring smile, full of love and strength—his strength that he was lending her.
Dillon rose on her other side and took her hand as Seth had. Then Michael also stood.
Lily didn’t even try to control the tears that slid silently down her cheeks. Her smile was so wide that no one could possibly confuse her tears for sadness or grief.
Confident in her husbands’ love and support, she faced the rest of the table once more.
“We have something special to share with you,” she said softly. It was hard to talk when her smile was so big and tears streamed endlessly down her cheeks.
Then she looked pointedly at the end of the table where the older generation of Colters sat.
“You’re going to have a grandchild. I’m pregnant. ”
A series of gasps flew around the table. Concern immediately flashed in the eyes of the Colters, but so did utter happiness and excitement.
Tears filled Holly’s eyes. Callie wiped at her own eyes as she glanced back at Lily. Lauren smiled but her smile was wistful, almost poignant, as if it reflected her own wishes and dreams.
And the dads’ reactions ranged from shock to satisfaction.
The silence abruptly ended as everyone reacted at the same moment. Whoops went up. Cheers erupted. A barrage of congratulations flew. Despite her husbands’ attempts to keep her seated, Holly jumped from her chair and dashed around to where Lily stood.
She enfolded her daughter-in-law in her arms and whispered in her ear, “Oh my baby, I’m so very happy for you. You know it’ll be all right this time. ”
Lily clung to her mother-in-law, closing her eyes as emotion knotted her throat. There were so many differing feelings to sort through. But best was this hug. This hug told her that she was loved and supported unconditionally. That her child would have the best the world could offer him or her. That her child would grow up in a family as strong and enduring as time itself.
“I do know,” she whispered back. “I’m okay. I’m more than okay. ”
Holly pulled away and suddenly the dads were there, pulling her into big, bone-crushing hugs. Seth, Michael, and Dillon all got slaps on the back, hugs, handshakes.
Callie and Lauren crowded in and hugged Lily next, and Lily absorbed the moment, so very different from her first pregnancy, when she’d been so alone and isolated. This time would be different. This time she was loved.
Max came forward to hug her. He kissed her wet cheek and then shook the hands of Seth, Michael, and Dillon. Everyone was talking at once. Exclaiming. Such happy sounds. Laughter. Joy. It was a balm to a soul that had long suffered the agony of silence.
Adam cleared his throat to get everyone’s attention, and to Lily’s surprise, tears gleamed in his eyes. He looked shaky. Happy. A little unbalanced. He kept staring at his sons with such love in his eyes that Lily felt the answering sting of tears once more.
Seth wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close as Adam motioned for quiet.
“That’s the best damn news I’ve had, apart from your mother being okay after she gave us such a fright. ” His expression grew more serious and he stared at Lily, singling her out. “Lily, honey, I just want you to know that we’re all going to be here for you. You never doubt that for a moment. You and our grandchild will be loved and cherished and covered up with support, so much so you’ll probably want to tell us all to buzz off. ”
