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“Is this a test?”
He frowned and confusion—genuine confusion—clouded his eyes. No, it obviously wasn’t a test and now she’d stepped into it all over again. If it had been a test of her trust, she’d failed miserably.
Without a word he reached round her and set her wrists free. He pulled at the material until she heard the sound of
Velcro separating. It slid from her waist and he tossed it aside.
Then he turned and walked out of the living room, leaving her alone and naked.
She trembled, suddenly cold. Silence crept around her until it was heavy against her ears. She became aware of each breath until she purposely lowered her respirations so the sound wasn’t so explosive in the quiet.
She’d hurt him. It hadn’t been intentional. It wasn’t some vindictive payback to make him suffer. But the truth was there for the both of them to see. She didn’t trust him anymore. Not completely.
Hadn’t she wanted him to feel at least one-quarter of the pain she’d felt when he’d left her? Hadn’t she wanted to get back at him even just a little?
She had, if she was honest, but now the victory—if it could be called that—was hollow and unsatisfying. She wanted to cry, not for all the pain she’d endured but for something beautiful that was lost.
Her shoulders sagging, she turned and walked slowly to the couch where she sank into the cushions. But the leather that had felt warm and comforting before was now cold and unwelcoming.
She pulled the thin blanket around her body and up to her chin. She wouldn’t cry. Not now. She’d managed to go a long time without tears.
Her eyelids drooped and she nestled her head against the arm of the sofa. Her heart ached, but it went even deeper. Soul deep.
Now that she’d actually hurt Max, she realized she didn’t have the stomach for revenge. Unintentional or not, she knew that she’d suffer just as much as he would.
She wanted him back. Wanted his hands on her. His mouth. She wanted him to smile at her. She wanted him to love her.
When Callie awoke, she lay still a moment and stared dully toward the fireplace. The hearth looked cold and empty. Pretty symbolic.
She stirred and twisted the kink from her neck. When she stared down the couch, she saw Max sitting at the end, his gaze fixed on her.
“Max. ”
She hastily sat up and the blanket fell to her waist.
He cocked his head to the side as his stare slid down her body. “Why didn’t you dress?”
She glanced down, frowned and then looked back up at him. “You told me to stay naked. ”
“Hmmm. ”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Okay, she sounded defensive. Hell, she was defensive. She was seriously teetering here and definitely working without a safety net.
“Just that on some level you trust me. I haven’t completely lost it. ”
She sighed. “I’m so sorry, Max. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. ”
He scooted forward on the couch and put a finger to her mouth. “Shhh. You won’t apologize for the way you feel. It’s my fault. I pushed too hard, too fast. It’s easy to forget that we’ve been apart for so many months. I’d love nothing more than to forget it and go back to the way things were before… Before I hurt you. That’s on me, though. I can’t expect to gain back everything we lost in a day. So it’s me who is sorry, Callie. Your hesitation hurt me more than I expected. I can’t bear the thought that you’d worry I’d in some way hurt you. ”
She leaned forward until her forehead rested on his mouth. “I don’t think you’d hurt me, Max. I don’t. I want this to work. ”
He laid his hand on the back of her head and then gently stroked over her hair as he kissed her forehead.
“I want this to work too, Callie. I shouldn’t have reacted as I did. You have the right to question me. You have the right to stop me at any time if you don’t feel comfortable. I don’t want you to feel like you ever have to suck it up and deal when you’re frightened or unsure just because you don’t want to hurt my feelings. ”
She closed her eyes and smiled as she circled his neck with her arms. “I really didn’t mean to hurt you, Max. I guess you’re right. I’m just a little unsure. I’m still unbalanced by it all. A few days ago I was alone and unhappy. Now such a short time later, I’m with you in Denver and we’re flying into the wind again. ”
He cupped her face and brushed his lips across her cheek and then pulled her against him to cradle her in his arms.
“I’m sorry, dolcezza,” he murmured against her hair. “I’m sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry I overreacted earlier. ”
She snuggled against his chest. “Think we could take up where we left off?”
He chuckled softly. “I can arrange that. ”
She slid off his lap and went to her knees in front of him. She eased her thighs apart and slowly turned her hands palms up on top of her thighs.
His nostrils flared with his quick intake of breath. “How beautiful you are, Callie. There on your knees, your eyes and mouth so sweet you take my breath away. ”
She stared back at him, her heart squeezing so hard in her chest she became light-headed. She put all her conviction into her gaze, her expression, the position of her body. She wanted there to be no doubt. She was his. This time… This time would be right. This time would be different.
