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“Take her to Limbo,” she hissed to the ‘horses.’ “Stay out of sight from the Order. Let the gatekeepers figure out what to do with her.” She smacked the nearest creature harshly. “Go.”
The creatures let out four tortured wails, then shambled forward.
I watched, stunned, as the most important thing in my life and in my death was carried away from me. All I had left was the promise of pain and torture, but at least she’d been spared.
Now, like Lysandra said, the fun was just beginning.
18
MARNIE
I woke up inside another cage.
Except this time, it was made of actual bones and flesh and—oof. I pressed my hand to my mouth to stave off my nausea and tried some deep breathing. The pounding in my head didn’t help, and my arm ached from where that bitch had bitten me… again.
I clutched my stomach as another wave of nausea ran through me. The ride wasn’t exactly smooth, and every bump jarred my head and stomach. I peered out of the latticework, trying not to think about just what it was made of, and saw familiar scenery go by. It was the wasteland between the circles, though I seemed to be skirting the thick fog between the third and second levels. The red and pink glowing city center of Lust crept closer to me and then eventually past me. I felt nothing as I stared out the window. For a place that had affected me so deeply before, Lust offered me nothing now, not even a twinge. Was it because Gabe wasn’t here? The object of my lust was far away from me, and all that was left was a deep, aching sadness. I’d been with Beck for years, and yet our breakup hadn’t made me this upset by a long shot. I’d spent only days with Gabe, but it felt like losing a limb.
“You’re an idiot,” I muttered to myself. “You should hate him.”
I should have. But I didn’t. Yes, it was Gabriel’s fault I was in Hell, but maybe it really had been an honest mistake? He’d helped me every step of the way, and the pain and hurt in his own eyes couldn’t have been faked that convincingly. Conflict and emotion buzzed and raged inside of me. I felt less like a woman and more like a thousand angry bees trapped in a skinsuit, unable to process every sensation I was feeling and just simply overcome. I hadn’t asked for any of this. I was a waitress at a shitty diner in a shitty town with a shitty boyfriend. Sure, I’d wanted a new life, a fresh start… but this was not what I had in mind.
I pinched my brow and groaned. I felt vulnerable, helpless, achy, and stupid. It wasn’t exactly a great cocktail for my self-esteem. Worse, despite all of that, I already missed feeling Gabe near me. He’d been such a lifeline in his own way, and now I was adrift in the underworld alone.
Suddenly, the carriage lurched to a stop. The beasts pulling the coach made an awful, mournful sound. The latticework door of flesh and bone opened, and I was physically pushed from the carriage by some unseen force. I landed in the gray dirt below with an oof. The dirt bit into my knees and elbows as I caught myself.
I groaned, my stomach and brain both swooping with a fresh bout of bright pain, then struggled to my feet. I tried to take a deep breath, but the air was almost suffocating. It held a faint scent of decay, mingling with the scent of dry earth. Behind me, the carriage was already moving again, back to its hellish mistress.
“Wait!” I called to it, even though the thought of getting back inside of it made me want to vomit. Still, it was better than being alone.
And I was truly alone.
The horizon blended seamlessly into the sky, creating an endless void that left me feeling empty. The ground was gray and lifeless. There were no signs of vegetation, no traces of life. The wind whispered through the air, biting through my dress with cold. In the distance, I saw a few trees, which was the only possible shelter. Not knowing what else to do, I walked toward them. Each step I took sent small clouds of dust into the air. I wrapped my arms tightly around myself, kept my head down, and plowed forward.
But once I got into the copse of trees, I realized quickly it didn’t offer much protection from the dust or the cold. There were maybe only seven trees in total. They were black and withered. In the center of the small cluster, the tallest tree had strange, heavy fruit hanging from its branches, and I realized with a sudden, harsh cry that the fruit looked like embryonic sacs. I saw flickers of movement inside, as if fetuses grew on the vine. I reached out, my brain barely computing what I was doing. My fingers brushed the tree, and it felt warm and yielding to my touch. I wanted to gag. I remembered reading once that unborn babies and unbaptized children went to Limbo, but that couldn’t be right. What sort of higher power would consider this any kind of afterlife?
I jogged, kicking up pale dust as I did. I didn’t know where I was going. I only knew I wanted to put as much distance as possible between me and that awful, sick orchard.
“Come,” a voice suddenly intoned. I couldn’t tell if it was in my head or not, but it rang and echoed in my skull like a bell.
I spun around, nearly tripping over my own feet as I did. “Hello? Please, is someone there? I—I need help.”
“Come,” it repeated, and then, suddenly, a blinding ray of light broke over the horizon. It was golden, like the sun was rising, and I had to shield my eyes for a moment. Tears streamed down my cheeks unbidden as it flared in my eyes. I had no choice but to run toward it. I squinted and ran, nearly tripping seven more times as I charged forward. It might have been a trap, but something about the golden light in this world of gray felt like a beacon of hope. The light radiated warmth, and I craved to be near it.
As I approached, the light took shape in front of me. It was a gate, standing tall and broad like a sentry in the middle of the monotonous scene. Unlike the gates to the levels in Hell, this gate was made of solid gold. There were no words or motifs on it, simply a golden barred door. There was nothing visible behind it but an expanse of white.
Wings fluttered above me, and a strong wind buffeted my hair and clothes. I closed my eyes as dust kicked up, and when I opened them, I screamed.
“Be not afraid,” the creature said, this time absolutely inside of my head.
You ever notice how angels in the Bible always say that? That’s because angels aren’t pretty beings with little harps and cutesy wings. They aren’t fat naked babies, and they definitely aren’t ripped blond dudes with six-packs.
The creature before me was terrifying.
It was a seraph, which I really only knew from artwork and internet memes. Look, I know that doesn’t sound worldly, but in the year of our Lord 2023, a girl takes knowledge where she can get it. It was a figure that seemed to blur the boundaries between the mortal and the divine, though it erred more toward the divine. It had a man-shaped form that towered over me, somewhere around twelve feet tall. The power that pulsed off of it sent shivers down my spine, though the warmth rolling off of it was welcome. Its skin was translucent and glowing, and I could see every vessel. It had no true face, but twelve brilliant blue eyes gazed down at me from its torso. Six wings spread out from its form. These wings weren’t just feathers, either. Four of them were, but the other two were an intricate network of iridescent membranes that caught and reflected the gate’s golden light. It was cloaked in a variety of pale fabrics that billowed around it and mimicked the movement of its wings. A sword hung at its side, blazing with white flames.
“Are you… are you some kind of guardian?” I managed to choke out.
“Yes,” it rumbled. “You do not belong, child. You upset the balance.”
