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“She’s the kind of woman I can see you with.” She might as well be honest. She didn’t mean to insult him by it, but that was what she thought of when she thought of Griff.
“I suppose at one time it would’ve been the kind of woman I would’ve been with. I can see how you would think that.”
It wasn’t that her past was pearly white. It wasn’t.
“I think once upon a time you mentioned that you had grown up with the Amish. Did I hear that right?”
He must have been listening pretty closely if he heard her say that. She didn’t admit that to just anyone. She might have been talking to one of her close girlfriends, maybe Kristin or Jubilee.
“My parents left the Amish sect. But they still did a lot of things the same way the Amish did them.”
“So you’re Amish but not Amish.”
“I’m not Amish at all.”
Her dad had left her mom after they had six kids, and her mom had married a man who wasn’t Amish.
“My stepdad abused us. All six of us kids. I was in the middle, so I didn’t get anything any worse or any less than anyone else, but it wasn’t a pleasant environment.”
To say the least. She left home as soon as she turned eighteen, without even finishing high school. She couldn’t stand it anymore.
“So you left as soon as you could,” Griff surmised, although she hadn’t said.
“Exactly.”
“Do you have a high school diploma?” His words were easy, like he didn’t judge her whether she had one or not. If she had to guess, she’d say he didn’t have one either. He looked like his background was probably very similar to hers.
“No. The day I turned eighteen, I moved out and got a job in a diner. I moved in with one of my sisters for a while, but I didn’t want to have the same lifestyle that we grew up in. And that’s the direction she was going.” She paused. “I went that way for a while.”
She’d done things she was very ashamed of. Things she wished she could take back. But life didn’t give a person do-overs. It just provided opportunities for them to make different decisions, which, she knew from experience, was very hard.
“It’s a wonder you don’t hate religion.”
“It is. My parents were very religious, but they didn’t have a relationship with Jesus. It was all about rules, which is basically what the Amish do in their religion. It’s all about following rules, not about loving the Savior.”
“The thing that Amish do well is their sense of community with each other.”
“They do that very well. And when you’re not a part of it, you definitely feel left out. I guess that’s what I got from the Amish community, the feeling of being left out.”
“You probably had cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents that you didn’t get to see much.”
“And when I did get to see them, they talked in Pennsylvania Dutch, which I didn’t know, and having people you’re playing with have their own secret language that you don’t understand makes you the odd man out every time.”
“Ouch. Especially when they’re your relatives.”
“Yeah. A lot of people think that if the Amish leave their sect, they’re shunned. But they’re not. If they haven’t joined the church, they can make the choice to leave. Of course, they’re under a lot of pressure to stay. But who would want to?”
“I guess I can see a lot of benefits from a simple way of life.”
“It’s simple, but it’s constant hard work. There’s just as much stress involved in being Amish and trying to earn enough money to pay your bills and as Amish move in and the land values go up, their property taxes often increase to the point where they are the largest and most onerous expense they have, not to mention the work is more dangerous and harder and longer and the comforts are fewer.” She couldn’t imagine going back to that lifestyle. “One night without electricity is more than enough for me.”
“It might be two nights. I doubt I’m going to get my bike out tomorrow.”
“All right. Two nights, but that’s my limit.” She tried to inject a little levity in her tone, but the subject matter really didn’t allow her to. It brought up memories she’d really rather not have.
“So you worked in a diner? Is that why you ended up buying one?”
“Yeah. I lived with my sister for a while, did the things that she did, and then I pulled away. Of course, when you do something like that, you’re no longer accepted, and while she didn’t kick me out, living with her became...uncomfortable. I moved in with a friend.”
