There had to be people who were doing that. There always were. But hopefully she’d find James, and once she was on his arm, people wouldn’t dare say anything unkind about her or her dress.
He’d mentioned how respected he was as a Chicago lawyer, and people wouldn’t dare talk bad about whatever woman was on his arm. And she intended for that to be her.
A waiter walked by, and she took a piece of whatever it was that was on his tray, picking it up by the toothpick that was stuck in it. Rice wrapped in some green stuff with... It looked like raw chicken, but she knew a person couldn’t eat raw chicken, so it couldn’t be that. She stuck it in her mouth.
She only chewed once before she frantically looked for a garbage can, making a mental note to not take anything off any tray again. Not until James was by her side to tell her what it was.
She was pretty sure that it looked like raw chicken because it was raw chicken.
Or maybe raw fish. Wasn’t sushi supposed to be raw fish?
She owned a diner, but they didn’t sell anything that fancy. Hamburgers and French fries were simple and hardy and kept the people in Strawberry Sands content.
These people were in a totally different class. She found a trash can and spit the offending bite of raw meat out of her mouth.
“Excuse me?” She spoke to another woman, who somehow managed to turn around and look down her nose at her and let her know how annoyed she was to be bothered, without saying a word.
“Never mind. Sorry,” Chi said, looking for someone who seemed friendly and nice.
Maybe it was where she was standing, but she couldn’t see a single person who fit that description.
Her dress felt too tight, too low, too exposing.
She glanced around, saw that there was no one looking at her, and then took both hands, holding the toothpick between her first two fingers like a cigarette, and pulled her dress up as hard as she could.
It felt like her boobs were about ready to fall out of it. She hated that feeling. She was already nervous enough, because she wasn’t supposed to be here.
James had specifically said that he wasn’t taking her.
But it was because he had business in the morning and he wouldn’t be able to bring her home.
She felt like he was trying to push her into moving in with him. After all, if they lived together, he wouldn’t have to worry about taking her home.
If that had been his end goal, it had been successful.
Her heart shriveled a little, the way it did every time she thought about moving in with James. No matter how much time she spent trying to convince herself that she wanted to, that it didn’t matter, that everyone did it, that she would be fine, she hadn’t been able to get rid of that feeling. The feeling that it was wrong. Some people might call it her conscience, maybe it was, but it felt more like the Holy Spirit whispering to her that she didn’t want to sin like that.
If a person truly had the Lord in their life, they couldn’t just wink at sin. They couldn’t accept it, they couldn’t continue to live it or walk into it with their eyes wide open. The Holy Spirit would let them know that it was wrong.
The feeling had gone from a little bit of unease to whispered words to what felt like God shouting in her head that she couldn’t go through with it.
Maybe she should go outside, get back in her car, and drive back to Strawberry Sands before the storm hit.
Chicagoans were quite savvy about the weather. They were used to big snows, lots of wind, and winter temps.
They just adjusted their plans and went on living.
Chi had moved through the entire building and found herself back at the door when a gust of cold air blew in.
Several ladies around her gasped, and it made Chi turn toward the dark night that the open door exposed.
She thought she caught a glimpse of James.
But it couldn’t have been James, because that man had a woman in a red dress beside him.
Still, her feet took her in that direction, waiting for the door to open again. They had been walking her way, the woman’s gloved hand on his arm, her sparkling eyes looking up at him and laughing at something he’d said.
Somehow that image became burned into her brain.