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“I went out a lot… back at home, I mean.” She chews on her lip. “I would flirt with guys. I don’t know why I did it. Just to prove to myself I could, I guess. To prove they wanted me, even if Gareth didn’t anymore. I never went home with any of them. I just… I wanted to feel something.”
Tightness threatens to take over my chest again and I take in a slow, deep breath.
“He was a prick, Rose. A boy who didn’t know anything other than his own selfish fucking ego. You deserve a man who understands the most valuable thing isn’t what you do to please him. It’s howhemakes you feel."
“That’s the most romantic thing I think I’ve ever heard anyone say. Who are you, Dax Silver?” She smiles, but it doesn’t mask the hurt that’s in her eyes. Nothing can hide that.
“It’s better you don’t know.” I ease back from her, so our faces are no longer almost touching and drop my hands from her hips and onto my thighs instead.
She laughs softly. She thinks I’m joking. But I’m not. I knew it before, and after what she’s told me, it’s even more glaringly obvious. I should not be anywhere near her.
“How do you feel?” She strokes my neck, leaning close again, closing the space I created between us. “You say it’s all about how you make someone else feel. How do I makeyoufeel?”
She looks at me with honest, innocent eyes, searching mine for something I can’t give her.
“You…” I look at her lips. “You make me…” Then lower, to her breasts, her hardened nipples visible through the thin fabric.Fuck.She’s so close to my cock, which is hard as steel between my legs. A couple of inches closer and her lower stomach will be pressed right up to it. I clench my hands into fists against my legs. “You…”
Her eyelids grow heavy, and she’s expecting me to kiss her. I know it.
But I can’t.
I fucking can’t.
I have no goddamn right to bring her into my shitstorm of a life.
“If I tell you that, then I’ll have to put you on the first plane back to New York,” I grit, sounding harsher than I intend to.
Her eyes pop wide. “But—"
“Thanks for cleaning me up. I appreciate it.” I grab my hoodie from the back of the sofa. I pull it on and zip it up.
She jerks back onto her heels, which allows me enough space to step up from the sofa and hold out a hand to help her up.
She shoves it aside and is on her feet in a split second. “See you at work, then,” she snaps.
The pinch at the corners of her eyes has me stepping into her space again until our chests graze one another’s. I keep my eyes on hers as I take her chin between my finger and thumb.
“You make me feel,Sunbeam. That’s all you need to know.”
“Sunbeam?” She stares at me, her eyes alight with energy.
I open my mouth, then close it again as I swipe my thumb over her bottom lip, following its path as my chest squeezes.
“Dax?”
I keep my lips sealed together, and when I say nothing, she shakes free of my grasp and stalks toward the door. I don’t try to stop her or call after her as she slips through it.
And then she’s gone.
And even though it’s for the best, it still stings like a bitch.
I spend the rest of the evening pacing up and down in front of my bedroom window, staring over at the cottage and the light in the front room. I pace until the light turns off and the one in the upstairs bedroom goes on.Her bedroom.What’s she doing in there? What’s she thinking? Maybe she’s packing? Maybe she’s going to leave.She should. It would make things simpler.
Bile rises in my throat, then retreats as the light goes out. She’s not going anywhere. At least, not tonight.
And yet I still pace for another two hours, my eyes trained on the front door of the cottage.
Just in case.
