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“Dude.”
My head snaps up, and I turn back to Carl, who is still sitting beside me.
“You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
I nod slowly. Even though Dylan has always been my best friend, Carl has always been a close second, and I trust his counsel more than most people.
“Alright then.” I lean forward. “I didn’t tell you this back in Gainesville because we were working, and I didn’t want you to think I was getting distracted.” I pause. “But something happened between me and Kaylee.”
A small smile curls up Carl’s lips. “I know.”
“Yeah and— wait, you do?”
“Yeah.” He nods, turning to face me squarely. “You insisted that I pull some strings to make sure she was considered for the grant. You’re a nice guy, but you won’t do that for just anyone.”
“Oh.” I sigh. “Yeah.”
“What happened?”
“I ruined it, and now, she hates my guts.”
“What did you do?”
“Well for the most part… I lied to her, and used her to get information on A and sons.”
“Oh.” Carl nods. “But how do you know that she hates you?”
“Well because she said so.”
“Have you tried apologizing?”
“Oh shit.” I let out a loud sigh. “Why didn’t I think about that?” I roll my eyes.
“Maybe you did when she actually figured out that you were lying to her, but have you talked to her after then?”
“She doesn’t want to talk to me.” I run my hands through my hair. “Like I said, she hates my guts.”
“So what do you want to do? Give up? Because that doesn’t seem to be working well for you.”
“I don’t know what to do. I mean, I want to talk to her. I know I fucked up, and all I want is to apologize, but she doesn’t want to see me, and it’s driving me crazy.” I scratch the back of my head.
“I think about her every day, and…I miss her. I miss spending time with her, and just being around her. Nothing seems fun anymore because she’s always in my head.”
“Hmm.” Carl nods. “Sounds like love.”
“What?” I turn to meet his gaze.
“Sounds like you’re in love with her.”
I open my mouth to speak, but no words come out. Carl’s right; even though it’s not something I let myself think about, I’ve known about that fact for so long.
“When you love someone, Ian, you don’t give up.” He pauses. “You can’t expect to leave Gainesville and just forget about her. It doesn’t work that way, and no amount of alcohol, parties and girls will fill the emptiness you’re feeling in your heart.”
I stare at the glass in my hands, watching as the last of the ice melts into the drink. Carl is leaving the most obvious point unspoken, and I tear my gaze from the ocean, turning back to him.
“I have to go back.”
“Yeah you do.”
