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On and on it went. Yvonne and Leo were there, as well as Hunter and Ailis, Lochlan and May. Every corner of the room was occupied by Colm’s cousins, all of them with their significant others, dancing, laughing, talking.
Being obnoxiously in love.
Kelli shook off her sudden melancholy and pushed it down deep. Then she heard Colm’s loud sigh and realized, in this room surrounded by happy lovers, they had something in common.
God help her. This was what life had come to. She now had a kindred spirit in Colm.
Fuck.
Looking around the room again, she spotted Robbie and Brooke in the kitchen, talking as he poured a beer from the keg.
“Your sperm donor is putting the moves on my date,” Colm muttered.
Kelli pointed to his pink umbrella. “You’re the one with the wand. Expelliarmus his ass.”
Colm laughed.
“You know, it’s a shame Brooke didn’t get the word that this was a costume contest,” Kelli teased.
Colm snorted. “Don’t be catty, Kell. I think she’s rocking the Regina George look. I like the tight pink sweater. Really accentuates her…” He held his hands out in front of his chest like he was carrying invisible melons, letting her fill in the blanks.
She snorted. “Like I said the other night. Just your type. Big tits. Brain optional.”
“Brooke’s brain is just fine. I mean…she’s not the most stimulating conversationalist, but she’s nice enough, and I’ve now had a complete rundown of the last season of The Bachelor. It was a nail biter. Should I catch you up?”
Kelli made a horrified face. “I’ll pass on the recap. Thanks anyway. So…are you still planning on rounding the rest of the bases?”
“Oh yeah. Hagrid is getting laid tonight.”
“Please,” she said, holding up her hand. “I don’t need the kinky Harry Potter, Mean Girls visual. I just ate.”
Colm spun his umbrella wand like a baton. “You’re just jealous.”
“And you’re a slut.”
He pulled her hair, winking suggestively, reminding her of his questions the other night about her sexual experiences. Last night, she’d actually spent a little time with her vibrator, her sexy fantasy one of bondage and a spanking and even the hairpulling. She’d come harder than she had in a very long time.
Until she realized Colm had been the man in the fantasy.
Then every loosey-goosey, happy feeling evaporated and she’d gotten up to take a cold shower, trying to forget about it.
She wasn’t sure she’d be able to pull that fantasy out again in the future. She was too afraid of a repeat performance. The last thing she needed was to start thinking about Colm as anything other than her lifelong frenemy.
“You sure you want to go the turkey baster route? I bet Han Solo wouldn’t mind pulling his lightsaber out for you.”
Kelli glanced back at Robbie, who had now been shanghaied into helping Sunnie add more ice to the keg bucket. She had to admit he was passing her Collins test with flying colors, able to hang with the crazy, fun-loving family easily.
“First of all, Han Solo doesn’t have a lightsaber. He has a blaster.”
“Even better,” Colm interjected, but she ignored him.
“This isn’t about sex, Colm. I want a baby. Not Robbie. He’s a nice guy, but we tried the dating thing and it didn’t work. Just like it hasn’t worked with the other three-thousand, nine-hundred and forty-two guys I’ve gone out with since high school.”
“That thing with Robbie was in college. Maybe he’s gotten better in bed.”
Kelli groaned. “You have a one-track mind. He and I never slept together. And I told you, I’m taking myself out of the meat market.”
“So you’re never going out with another man?”
