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"What if I make a choice that gets Annie killed?" she almost shouted the words back at Bella.
Bella stared at her. "Don't you get it by now? That you can't hide from danger in life? What if Jacob's dad drowns in some river tomorrow and no one finds him and we never know he's dead, but you left and never come back because of what might be. You could have spent the next fifty years with the man you love, but you don't, because of some imagined threat that doesn't even exist anymore? And your little girl could have had the dad who would give her everything she could ever need, including and especially love?"
Anger began to simmer through Phoebe. "I gave up my family for Annie, so I could go into hiding—"
"Do you like your family?" Bella interrupted.
"I love them—"
"You have family you love, and you gave them up because some jerk might come after you someday? Are you kidding?"
Phoebe bunched her fists. "You don't understand what it's like to be hunted by a monster, Bella. Eliana gave me, and Annie, the chance to live without fear. When you've been staring into the eyes of your husband, certain that tonight is the night he's going to kill you, it changes you forever. Forever. You can call me a wimp. Maybe you're right. But I'm too damned scared of how bad men can be to stand here and put Annie in the crosshairs of Ivan. I'm sorry for being scared. If you can tell me how to stop being so freaking scared, and to know how to keep my baby girl safe, then do it. Tell me."
Bella's face softened, and her mouth pursed with regret. "I'm sorry. I didn't know about your background."
Phoebe shrugged. "Do you have a magic wand, Bella? Because that's what I need."
Bella looked down at the river. "You know there's no magic wand, Phoebe. I have my own story, my own past, and it still follows me. I don't have an answer as to how to leave it behind, but I do know that the nine of us are safe because we trust each other. We set up external safeguards, and more importantly, we rely on each other. I'd never in a million years give up my family to stay safe. I'd fight for them, with them, and beside them until my last breath, because they're what makes life worth living."
Phoebe closed her eyes. God, she wanted to be a part of this family. "What if you fell in love with a man who had an enemy who would hunt down your brothers and torture them, just to hurt the man you love? Who would you choose? Stay with the man you fell in love with and let your brothers be in danger? Or leave him to keep your brothers safe?"
"My brothers come first," Bella said without hesitation. "Always."
Phoebe looked over at Bella. "That's what I'm doing," she said softly. "I have to give up the man of my heart to keep my daughter safe. If I stay with him, I add his enemies to Annie's. If I leave, then we only have her enemies, who hopefully will be stopped soon."
Bella stared at her, then slowly nodded. "Okay," she said. "I understand. But I still believe that you guys are safer with Jacob. With us."
Phoebe looked down at the river. Annie was on Jacob's shoulders as he splashed through the water. Cupcake was bounding around beside them, barking at Jacob. Annie was hitting her palms against Jacob's head with glee, while Lucas walked along with them, laughing. The deep male voices echoed across the water, and they filled her with peace, not fear.
Annie was so happy with Jacob. She clearly felt safe with him, just like the horses did, and just like Phoebe did. There was so much to gain by staying with Jacob. But what if Ivan came for them one night? It wouldn't be worth it. It wouldn't. "He's just such a scary man," she whispered.
"Ivan?"
Phoebe nodded.
Bella sighed. "He is."
"Look at that little girl," Phoebe said. "She's so happy right now. I've never seen her so free and happy as she's been since we came here. She loves the horses, Jacob, Lucas, you…"
"Maybe she's happy because her mom's happy."
Phoebe looked over at Bella. "It's not me."
"Of course it's you. You're her whole world. Don't underestimate your importance to her, as well as Jacob. You matter, Phoebe. One of the hardest lessons for all of us Harts to learn was that we matter, because we all wound up on the streets as kids. When you're a homeless kid, it's pretty easy to believe you don't matter. That you're worthless. So, we work on that together. It's important."
Phoebe bit her lip. Her yearning to be a part of this family forever was so strong it actually made her chest ache. But she couldn’t stop thinking of her own ex-husband, of Sienna going missing, of Ivan's face, of the danger Annie had already experienced in her life. "I can't be that selfish," she whispered. "I just can't—"
A piercing whistle suddenly bit through the air.
Everyone turned to look at Tristan, who was on the butte. He held up his hand and made a gesture.
"Oh, fuck." Bella leapt to her feet. "Come with me!"
The brothers in the river went into fast and precise action. Colin kicked his horse into a gallop, racing through the water toward Tristan. Lucas grabbed Cupcake and tucked him under his arm and made a break for the waterfall at the edge of the water. Jacob started sprinting after Lucas, Annie still on his shoulders.
Fear tore through Phoebe as she scrambled down the rock, following Bella as she raced after Jacob. "What's happening?"
"I don't know yet, but that's our signal for a level five threat."
