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The door opens and a girl I assume is Kayla’s roommate walks in, a grocery bag in each hand. ‘Hey, Kayla, I got mixers for tonight’s—’ She stops when she spots me.
There’s an awkward moment as Kayla shifts anxiously on her feet and the roommate’s gaze shifts between Kayla and me.
I put on my best fake smile, determined that it will be my last. ‘It was good to see you again, Kayla.’ I step around the roommate to the still open door. ‘Just remember you can always call, okay?’ My voice nearly cracks on the last word but I keep it together.
Kayla nods.
Leaving her to her new life, I catch a ferry to get back to mine.
27
THOMAS
I can’t sleep.
Last night I thought it was the alcohol. Too much to keep me awake, not enough to put me under. Tonight, it’s the silence. Or what the silence means.
No Alice. No Mary. No discussions of which princess rules them all (always Cinderella) over breakfast (sugar-filled). No shy smiles and passionate kisses.
The silence makes me ache in a way exercising never does.
It also makes it too easy to keep asking myself the question both Alice and my mother asked – why? Why did I want them to stay when I made it so easy for them to leave?
Apparently, I only fooled myself using Mary’s safety as the answer.
Mary is safe right now, just like my lawyer said she and Alice would be in the apartment I purchased. And as long as she has Alice, she’ll be fine.
I even made sure to send them groceries, complete with chocolate chips, worried Alice would use her savings for food. She’s determined to follow the damn contract to the letter having emailed her resignation this afternoon.
And while I feel guilt, if I’m honest with myself, which I hate doing when it comes to feelings, guilt isn’t the answer to why.
The why is Alice.
Her smile. Her shy strength. Her warmth. I miss her because I love her. Her and Mary.
I hadn’t thought myself capable of it. Especially not in such a short amount of time.
I pause, remembering my mother’s opinion on my having been circling Alice for the past year. As much as I wanted to deny it, for fear of it making me seem predatorial like my father, there is truth to it.
Mary simply came in like a kaleidoscope wrecking ball to the heart.
The sheets pull across my legs and I stiffen.
My existential crisis may be the prime reason I can’t sleep, yet I can’t ignore legitimate concern that my brother’s flesh-toned Beelzebub is planning something. I’ve opened my eyes multiple times in the last few hours to find him glaring at me. Each time he seemed a little closer than the last.
To say he’s displeased would be an understatement.
He spent all of last night watching me drink and flip through the pictures on my phone after Mother left. And all today meowing from outside my dark room door. I came out multiple times on the rare chance he was having a Lassie moment and was trying to alert me to some kind of disaster. But each time I was met with a hiss.
Just as sleep seems to find me, I feel movement on the bed. I open my eyes just in time to see Mike’s wrinkled ass coming toward me.
‘That’s it.’
Climbing out of bed, I get dressed and head to the basement.
* * *
‘Is he dead?’ George’s voice seeps into my consciousness.
