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Finn looks at me, his eyes shining with amusement. "Oh, this I've gotta see."
The three of us make our way out to the back of the reception venue, where there's a pond. People are already starting to gather, couples holding hands and enjoying the view. I can hear the sound of croaking frogs in the distance, the scent of lilacs wafting through the air.
"Just like old times," Finn says, chuckling.
I take a deep breath, trying to still the butterflies in my stomach. It's been a while since I've done this, but I'm pretty sure I still remember how to do it. I crack open my can of beer and take a deep breath, then hand the can to Finn.
"Ready?" he asks, grinning.
"Ready," I confirm.
He pokes a hole in the can with his keys, then hands it back to me. I feel like an idiot, but I do it, managing not to spill a drop on my dress. Johnny is cackling like an idiot as I finish the beer and hold the can out, not sure if I'm nauseous or if I've just got butterflies in my stomach.
"Damn, girl!" Johnny shouts. "You weren't kidding."
"Yeah...she's really something, isn't she?" Finn says.
I just shotgunned a beer--something very muchlessthan ladylike--but Finn is looking at me like I'm a princess. I'm glad he can't see me blush in the darkness, and all our attention is drawn to the outdoor dance floor as a slow dance starts.
"Alright, my little redneck princess," Finn jokes. "I've gotta have at least one dance tonight."
I nod and take his hand.
"Glad you asked before I could," Johnny says. And he winks as he adds, "You two have fun."
We make our way to the dance floor, my heart pounding in my chest. I haven't danced like this in a while, and certainly not with Finn. As we sway to the music, I'm acutely aware of his hand on my waist, the heat of his body against mine. For a moment, I allow myself to forget about Steven and everything else, and just enjoy being in Finn's arms. It feels like home.
"You still got it," Finn says, his lips close to my ear. "I remember you used to dance like this all the time."
I grin. "Like what--badly?"
"No, no," he chuckles. "Like you were born to do it."
I laugh, feeling myself relax around him. It's like no time has passed at all, and we're just two friends enjoying each other's company. But there's a tension between us, a chemistry that I can't ignore. I know it's wrong, but my head is a little fuzzy from shotgunning that beer, and I just want to lean in and breathe him in.
"I hope tonight hasn't sucked without your fiancé here," he murmurs. "You seemed pretty upset earlier."
I can feel his breath on my ear as he speaks, and it sends shivers down my spine. "It's okay," I say, trying to sound casual. "I'm just not used to being away from him for so long."
Finn nods, his hand tightening on my waist. "I get that. It's tough being apart from the person you love."
I look up at him and see a flicker of something in his eyes. Is it longing? Regret? I can't tell, but it's enough to make me feel like I'm on fire. I want to kiss him, to feel his lips on mine, but I know I can't. I'm engaged to another man, and Finn is...well, he's Finn. He's my friend, the person who knows me--or at least, whoonce knew me--better than anyone else in this world.
"I don't even know if I love him," I blurt out.
Oh no.
Why the hell did I say that?
Finn's brow furrows, his eyes searching mine. "That...doesn't seem good."
I bite my lip. I want to hide my face in shame. "I shouldn't have said that," I mutter.
"No, you should talk about it," Finn says. "Jenny...you're committing to spend the rest of your life with this guy."
The song ends and I try to pull away from him, but he catches my hand.
"We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," he says, "but if you do...I'm here, okay? I know I wasn't around for the past couple years, but I'm here now."
