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Valerie's already starting out on the margaritas, but I noticed they're much weaker than usual. Or I think they are. I don't usually join her for margaritas, but her mix seems like she used a really light touch on the booze.
“So has anybody heard from Olivia?” Raina asks the question while looking from me to Valerie as she walks over, two drinks in hand, and sits down at the table.
She places one of the drinks in front of Valerie and the other in front of herself while nodding at my still half full glass so I know I wasn’t left out, just that she noticed I wasn’t ready for another just yet. Nobody likes a melted margarita.
“Yes, it sounds like she's not super happy with her choice.” Valerie leans forward and knows her voice as if there's some reason to keep a secret just between us three. “It turns out that Darren isn't just bad at communication, but he’s bad in bed.”
Raina lets out a chuckle. “She told me he lasted all of thirty seconds, didn't even ask her if she enjoyed it, rolled over and went to sleep and was snoring within a minute.”
I try to hide my hurt feelings that Olivia hadn't reached out to me even though she reached out to both of my other friends. “How do you get all the way through an engagement without finding that out about the guy you’re with?”
Valerie widens her eyes before taking a drink from her glass. “How do you get to our age without thinking most guys are like that?”
We all share a laugh and then go quiet for a few moments. “How long do you think they have?” Raina gives me the side eye, as if thinking I’ll be the first to respond.
I'm not about to disappoint. “Judging by the way she's talking, it's already over.” I take another sip of my drink, then realize the two of them are sharing a glance. I can't help but wonder what's going on that I don't know about.
As I scan the little Airbnb, I take in the beauty of the space. This time, we're not on the beach, but in a little cabin in the lush woods. The air here is so fresh. We've opened all the windows and then left them open despite the impending chill. While it's cooler here than anyone else thanks to the press of trees, it's still pretty toasty out, so there’s no harm in leaving the windows open for a while.
“Well, on that note,” Raina says shyly, studying her half-empty glass, “I wanted to share some news.”
Something about the way she says the words has me holding my breath. I glance across the table at Valerie feeling a little bit nervous and realize she seems to be totally still also. As our gazes meet, I notice that she lifts her shoulders slightly as if she has no idea what we’re about to hear.
Raina glances from one to the other of us, and I focus on her. There's so much excitement in her face that I can't help but wonder what she's about to say. And as she opens her mouth, I realize I don't have to wait long.
“I met someone.” The words leave her abruptly and I can sense that saying them took serious effort. Of course, I can understand why she'd want to hold them in. As disappointment washes through me, I wonder where the heck things went off the rails.
Raina glances at Valerie, then studies me for a moment. “It's customary to tell someone you're happy for them when they tell you that they've met someone.”
“It's also generally frowned upon to lie to your friends.” As I say the words, I take a deep drink from my cup. Valerie lifts her head and stares at me, eyes wide, and Raina’s mouth drops open.
I know that Raina hasn't dated anyone since her husband passed away. She's been focusing on her career and herself, and she always says she doesn't need a man to be happy. So what happened to that line of thinking?
“Moira,” Valerie says, her voice aghast as she stares at me. But I don't care what she thinks; our friend said one thing and did another.
“Look, just because you're miserable, Moira, doesn't mean the rest of us need to be.” Raina’s anger shines through the hurt in her words.
“I'm happy for you,” Valerie says, always the dutiful friend. “Do we know him?”
Raina doesn't stop glaring at me as she talks to Valerie. “You do. I didn't actually ‘meet’ him. He's somebody I already knew, but we’re in love, and we’re going to get married.”
The fact that she's hesitant to share who it is tells me she's ashamed of what she's done. I down the rest of my drink and get up and go into the kitchen. At this point I'm curious, but I'm not sure I want to know. I set my glass down and grip the counter with both hands until my knuckles turn white.
Is there any truth in her words? I couldn't possibly want other people to be miserable just because I am. But it's not like that. I just thought they were smart enough not to get into relationships with people, because relationships always lead to pain. Honestly, who wants to get hurt?
I pour another weak margarita in my glass before adding a couple extra shots straight from the bottle. Mixing the mess up with my index finger, I quickly bring the digit up to my mouth before I drip and realize the drink is going to be strong.
Perfect. I'm going to need a stiff drink to get through tonight, I think. Moving forward though, I'm just going to keep my mouth closed and tell her exactly what she wants to hear, because she doesn't want the truth, clearly. She wants to be coddled and told that everything will be alright, even as we watch another friend's marriage fall apart right before our eyes.
I carry my glass out to the other room and they both stop talking for a moment. “So who is he?” I keep my tone light and cheerful without a hint of the betrayal I feel inside. How many talks did we have about never getting married again? I guess some people just can't keep true to their word.
Raina is quiet for a moment, then turns to Valerie. Stunned that she would be so rude I lift my head and stare at her. “Are you just ignoring me now?” I blurt out before realizing those words are probably the worst thing I could possibly say.
Her expression tightens, and she glances at Valerie. “No, Moira. I’m just...” She sighs. “I’m just over your attitude.” There's disdain in her voice, that same angry sound a teenager might have when their mother oversteps and asks an annoying question.
She reaches for her purse and pulls out a ring box while I gulp down more than half my drink. Both pause and watch me for a moment, and I set my glass down a little harder than expected. Surprised the glass didn't break under my hand, I meet Raina’s stare and she continues pulling out the box.
As she opens the box, a huge marquee diamond glitters in the light, surrounded by a halo of smaller marquee diamonds. With the incredible ring set into white gold, it resembles a snowflake. The ring is breathtakingly beautiful and some part of me wants to lean in close and study the incredible piece with awe.
