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“Scott,” she said, and tried to pour all the love she felt for him into his name. “I hate that you’ve been living with guilt over everything that happened. I know you’ll never forgive yourself. But when I think about it, I can’t help thinking that what you did...” She took a breath. “Maybe it was better for Ella.”
“Don’t say that—”
“It was a tragedy, what happened. A horrible tragedy, but Ella has come out okay. She’s grown up in a safe home with a wonderful father. She never would have had any of that if—”
“No,” he said, suddenly fierce. “Don’t pretend like what I did was some heroic act. My daughter’s mother is dead, Molly. No amount of positive parenting can erase that. I hope to God Ella never finds out what happened, but she’ll always live with the consequences. She’ll never know her mother.”
Molly gripped his arm, trying to make him understand. “But is that such a horrible thing, Scott? Her mother was—”
“You didn’t know Kristina.” He rubbed his face, looking so exhausted she wondered if he’d slept at all. “She went through hell the year Ella was born. Her dad died within a few months of Ella’s birth, her mom was in prison. Ella wasn’t an easy baby, never slept more than a couple hours at a time, always crying. Colic, the doctor said. Yeah, Kris struggled. But I have no doubt that if I hadn’t made a stupid, rash decision that night, she would’ve gotten back on track. She would’ve been a wonderful mother to Ella.”
“But you don’t know that. Scott, look at me. You don’t know if she would have gotten better. She could have gotten worse. Ella was already in danger—”
He shook his head. “Don’t give me a pass on this, Molly. It was my fault. My responsibility. I...” He stopped himself, shaking his head.
“What?” she asked. “What are you not telling me?”
“Nothing.” But he wouldn’t meet her gaze.
Molly’s eyes pricked with tears at the guilt lacing his voice. “I’m sorry about Liv,” she said. “I didn’t know...”
His mouth twisted. “She manipulated you, weaseled her way into our lives.”
“I think she just wanted to find her niece—”
“She can’t ever see Ella again.” Scott’s jaw tightened. “You understand that, right?”
“But they’re family, Ella and Liv. You should see how well they get along. I’m not saying we need to tell Ella the whole truth, but can we figure out how to explain it? I think Liv needs Ella, and Ella definitely needs Liv.”
He dismissed that with a quick shake of his head. “It puts us at risk, don’t you see?”
“But if you met her, if you had a chance to talk to her...”
He barked a laugh. “That’s a wonderful idea. Hang out with the one person in the world who could ruin my life, and my daughter’s life.”
“I don’t think she wants to ruin anyone’s life, Scott.”
“It’s too risky.”
“Do you have a better idea?” Molly exhaled in frustration. “Because if you’re trying to cast Liv as some kind of villain, you’re missing the point. This is an opportunity to come together, to connect, to be vulnerable together—”
“To connect? To be vulnerable?” He shook his head. “You can’t use your social media skills to get through this. This is real life.”
She sat back, stung by his dismissive tone. “Do you have a better idea?”
He didn’t meet her eyes. “I’ve been stashing cash for years, new passports—in case something like this happened.” The edge in his voice startled her. “Option one: pay Olivia off. Not sure if that will work—she could come back wanting more. Option two: we run, Ella and I. Start over somewhere else, new identities, new job, everything.”
She noted that when he said, “we run,” he didn’t include her and Chloe. She didn’t know how to feel about that—she had no intention of starting her life over, but it hurt that he didn’t want her. That he could leave her without a second thought.
“Or,” she said, trying to sound reasonable, “we talk to Liv and try to understand what she wants. Not just pay her off—come to some sort of agreement. Try to see her side.”
He didn’t answer, his eyes still fixed on his coffee mug. Probably thinking through his options. Maybe planning his escape. The thought terrified her.
She took his hand in both of hers, holding it until he met her eyes. “Yesterday you asked me to move slowly, to not make any sudden decisions. But now I’m worried you’re going to make a rash decision. Promise me you won’t, Scott. Let’s think about it. Let’s talk to Liv—”
“If she hasn’t already called the FBI.”
“I don’t think she’d do that. I think she wants what’s best for Ella.”
