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I tip my face up to stare into Fort’s amber gaze. “I’m sorry.”
His brows draw together in confusion. “For what?”
“For what Bowman is saying must be done.”
Fort leans down and presses his lips to the corner of my mouth. I breathe him in, sucking in a shaky breath as he pulls away and repeats the gesture on the other side. Lust hammers in my veins, and heat sears me from the inside out. I want him. Desperately.
“Tell me to stop, and I will,” he whispers. “But I spent far too long denying us what I knew we both wanted at the orders of a king.”
I want to tell him that it doesn’t matter to me whether Bowman approves or not. But it’s not that simple. My brother threatened to execute Fort if he catches us together. And I don’t doubt for a single moment he won’t carry through on that.
“Fort, he’ll kill you.”
“He can try,” he whispers.
My mind struggles to refute what my heart has always known. Fort is my everything. And if he dies because Bowman catches us out here, I’ll never survive it.
So I force myself back a step. Then another. All while Fort remains standing where he was, his breathing heavy. “I can’t lose you, Fort.”
“If you marry Patrick, you will.”
“It won’t come to that. But we won’t be able to find another way if Bowman makes good on his promise and kills you.” Fort closes the distance between us, so I hold up a hand and press it to his chest. “Please, Fort.”
He covers my hand with his. It’s warm against mine and damn near shatters my already wavering resolve. “We waited years. I suppose a bit longer won’t kill us.”
I take a deep breath then lean my head against his muscled chest. The heavy beating of his heart against my ear is a melody that lulls the panic from my veins. The fear that I’ve been carrying since I discovered just what my brother means to do with me.
“Now.” Fort steps away from me and undoes the belt holding his sword at his waist. He puts up both fists. “Shall we?”
“You’re going to train me to fight?”
“If I can’t have my hands on you in one way, then I’m going to in another.” Challenge shines in his bright gaze. “Besides, if Bowman catches us, all I’m doing is training you to protect yourself.”
I put my fists up, the warmness of joy gracing me with its presence for the first time in days. “Very well. If you want to lose to a princess, who am I to tell you otherwise?”
Fort laughs. “Tomorrow, I’ll bring training blades out. I’m not trying to have your blade destroy mine.”
I shake my head, recalling the way the Tenebris soldier’s armor had turned to ash beneath the force of the Blade. “I suppose that’s fair.”
“Ensure you’re holding your fists correctly,” he tells me.
“I know how to throw a punch, Fort. I did grow up with four older brothers.” To demonstrate, I open my hand then close down my fingers and seal it with my thumb.
“Always keep your face guarded,” he tells me. “And keep your elbows tucked in to protect your sides.”
I do as he says, mimicking his stance. “Now what?”
“Fight like hell.” He moves forward and swings. I duck, missing a hook to the cheek. The grass is moist beneath my knees, but I ignore it and roll to the side to get back up. I can handle a bow like the best of them. I’m even half-decent with a blade.
But hand-to-hand is not something I’ve ever trained on.
Fort drops down and spins, sweeping a leg and taking me to the ground. He jumps on top and pins me to the ground, a hand around my throat. Desire takes hold of me, and I freeze beneath him, my earlier reasons for refusal becoming a mere echo in my mind.
Especially when he leans down and whispers, “I’ve got you on your back, Carleah. What are you going to do about it?”
* * *
Exhausted, sore, and dirty, I make my way back into the camp and head toward my tent. Fort is behind me, hiding in the shadows and waiting until the coast is clear so he can slip back in unnoticed. The fact that we’re having to sneak around in the first place pisses me off even more than not being allowed to be with him.
