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We drive down Douglas Street, everything glowing red and green on the mountain. Candy cane striped store fronts. Mounds of snow piled in the middle of the intersection, situated beneath the only stoplight in town. A few tourists meander down the streets, taking in the Christmas lights. Kyle veers off the main road, takes a back one.
"Where are we going?" I ask.
His fingers find mine. "It's a surprise."
"Another Christmas present?" I ask as I reach a hand up, touch the half carat diamond earrings he gifted me this afternoon when we finally got out of bed.
"Sort of," he teases as we pull up to his favorite coffee shop.
I laugh. "Why are we here?"
"Come on," he smiles as he unbuckles his seatbelt.
I unclick the seatbelt, hop out of the car and meet him on the sidewalk. He wraps an arm around me as he guides me to the coffee shop. He knocks on the mahogany-framed glass door. While we wait, a cool breeze whips by, ruffling the dark brown hair on his forehead.
"I love you," I tell him as I rock onto the balls of my feet, pressing my lips to his.
"I love you, too," he tells me as he peers down at me. The soft yellow Christmas lights form a hazy glow around us as I take him in. It wasn't that long ago that we walked into this coffee shop, and he ordered me a hot chocolate while I cried over someone else.
We had sat in the back corner, tucked safely away from prying eyes and wandering ears. I had wrapped my arms around myself, grateful for the CU Boulder sweatshirt he had loaned me. I sobbed quietly as I stared out the window, my chest aching, hurting, throbbing. It felt like a piece of it was missing. A hole where blood and tissue and organ should have been. I had no idea that Kyle, seated across from me, would be the one to heal that part of me.
Sometimes, I wonder if it was really Matt I was crying over or everything I knew I was losing sitting beside him in his Jeep that day. Giving him something never really meant for him. Even if neither of us wanted to admit it, we ruined our friendship. Maybe that's what was supposed to happen all along. Maybe Matt needed to leave to make room for Kyle.
Rita, the middle-aged woman who owns the coffee shop, and always wears her dark gray curls in a bun on top of her head, unlocks the door.
"Hey guys," she beams at us. "Back corner is ready for you."
My heart soars as I walk towards our table, the little table that changed everything.
Kyle pulls out the chair for me, slides it under me as I sit down.
"Here you go," Rita smiles as she sets a mug of hot chocolate in front of me and a coffee in front of Kyle. She retreats to the back room, most likely to her office, leaving us shrouded in darkness except for the glow of the strung Christmas lights across the square pouring in through the windows.
"This is..." I don't even know if I know the right word for it.
"Perfect," he offers.
"Perfect," I agree as I stare into his chocolatey brown eyes.
I would do it all over again if I knew what I know now. That I was always meant to end up here, with Kyle.
I meant what I said earlier. My whole heart is his. Even if it took me a little longer than it should have to figure it out.
"What are you thinking?" Kyle asks as he leans over the table, plants a kiss on the tip of my nose.
I gaze out at the square, see a few snow flurries as they spin and twirl outside the glass window. When I look back at him, I feel lighter, less weighted down.
"I was thinking I'm glad I went through everything I did."
He raises both of his eyebrows. "Why is that?"
I set down my cup of hot chocolate and stand from my seat. I circle the table, climb into his lap, wrap both my arms around his neck. "Because this is where I was always meant to be. With you."
The corners of his lips tug up as a hand slides through my hair, grips the back of my head. He kisses me slowly as his other arm wraps around my back.
Kissing Kyle. Still my favorite pastime.
After we've finished our drinks, and my lips are swollen and red from his, we leave behind the coffee shop and head back out into the dark night.
