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He gives me a small smile. "Not well."
"Do you want to talk about it?" My arms tighten around his neck as I try to offer him as much comfort as I can without crossing any lines or boundaries.
"I'm so excited to be a dad. I love that little girl so much already," he sighs. "I'm counting down the days until I get to meet her, hold her. On the other hand, my mom's dying. And I don't want to rush that. I keep trying to slow down the days so I can spend more time with her. It's morbid. Around the time I'm supposed to be a father, I'm going to lose my mom."
I lay my cheek on his shoulder, not sure what else to do. "I'm sorry, Matt."
"She gave me my grandmother's ring," he says quietly.
I lift my head. "Your mom did? She gave you your grandmother's engagement ring?"
He nods. "She wants me to propose to Audra."
I stop moving, stare up at him in shock. "What are you going to do?"
He peers around the room, breathes through his nose before looking down at me. "I've put Audra through hell. I've broken up with her at least a dozen times. But she still comes back to me. She's going to do online courses next semester so she can stay close to home. She could have gone to California. She could have taken my daughter and ran, but she didn't. She stayed here for me when I needed her to. She didn't give it a second thought. I think I owe her a real commitment."
My heart thuds loudly in my chest. "Matt, please don't propose to her."
"What the fuck, Jenny?" I hear beside us. Kyle's standing there, hurt and pain and torment streaking down his face.
"No," I shake my head as I let go of Matt. "It's not what you think."
"Fuck you," he spits at me.
Kyle takes off through the crowd with me chasing after him, hysterically calling out his name, the tears clouding my vision.
I push through the door at Bruce's and see him standing there, fury in his dark eyes, waiting for me beneath the broken streetlight.
"Why the fuck did you tell him not to propose to her?" Kyle takes a step back as I try to reach for him.
"Because they're not ready," I return. "It has nothing to do—"
"Every fucking time, Jenny," he throws his hands in the air, earning a few worried looks from passersby. "I turn around and you're kissing him or dancing with him or begging him not to marry the girl he knocked up. You think I slept with someone else, so you kiss him. He's sad and miserable, so you kiss him again. He's going to propose to someone, you ask him not to."
"I'm looking out for both of them," I hurriedly explain. "He's not ready and she deserves someone who wants only her. Maybe in the future that will be him, but it won't work out if he does it now."
"Don't pretend you aren't still in love with him," Kyle rolls his eyes. I can tell he's had a few beers by the way his body stumbles a little as he tries to cross his arms over his chest.
"What do I have to do to prove to you that I love you? Huh?" I yell. "I have given you everything. My heart, my body, my soul. It's all yours. I sleep in your bed. You sign my paychecks. I moved early to be with you. Please, Kyle, tell me what more I have to do to show you that I don't want him."
"End your friendship with him," Kyle demands.
"No," I stand my ground.
"You go back in there and you tell him not to talk to you, touch you or seek you out ever again or we're done," he threatens.
"No," I say again. "I love you, but I'm not giving up a lifelong friendship for you. You told me you trusted me because I'm always honest with you. Well, guess what? I love Matt. I've always loved him. I probably always will love him. But I chose you and I would do it all over again even if Audra didn't end up pregnant. I want a life with you. I want to be with you. I want to get married to you and have children with you. If that's not enough for you, then what are we doing here?"
Before he can respond, Matt bolts out the door, holds up his cell phone. "The neighbor called. There's an ambulance at the house. We need to go home now."
In unison, we run as fast as we can the two blocks to Kyle's car. I rip the keys from Kyle's hand, tell him he's had one too many beers to be driving. Matt climbs into the backseat and Kyle sloppily rushes to the passenger side door, losing his footing and sliding along the black asphalt.
I try to drive as fast and safely as I can through town, watching out for trick-or-treaters and the hordes of people taking advantage of the warm fall night.
My hands are shaking the whole time they're gripping the steering wheel and the heat behind my eyelids threatens to unleash a flood of tears.
I don't even know what to think. What happened? Is Diane gone? Did she have a seizure? What's going on?
