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Inhaling the brisk air deep into my lungs, I rub the coin in my pocket for luck and close my eyes as much to center myself as anything else. One foot in front of the other, heel to toe, I count fifteen paces from the balcony's edge across the smooth rock of the palace grounds.
I reach out a hand in front of me, feeling around for the statue’s base. Panic rises in my chest when my hand hits only empty air. It has to be here somewhere. I couldn’t have wandered that far in the wrong direction.
Taking another lurching step forward, my shoulder collides with the hoof of the rearing horse, and I mutter a stream of curses, rubbing at the spot with my palm. Good to know I’m not a totally hopeless case.
I shift one step to my right, grinning when I run my fingertips over the horse’s outline, from kicking hooves to elegantly curved wings to smooth flank. A sudden longing hits me in the center of my chest, but I shake it off. I’ll be reunited with Meera again in a day, hopefully less, and then I’ll never leave her again.
Tracing the square base of the statue, I navigate around it and finally feel the hairs pricking up on my arms. I’m so close. Just a few steps to the left and…there. The smallest void in Thieran’s wards.
Fingertips running over the outline of the coin in my pocket, I inch closer to the barrier. I didn’t try to go through it before, afraid someone might see me, and I have no idea if I’ll actually be able to slip through. I’m navigating only on instinct and what little hope I have left.
I reach my right hand up to where the wards remain intact, and my palm presses against a flat surface. If I didn’t know there wasn’t anything in front of me but air and the grass beyond the expanse of rock, I’d think I was touching a wall.
My fingers inch across the mirage, slowly, so slowly, until they dip forward and through the weak spot. I push my entire arm through and wait for something to happen. But nothing shoves my limb back. No lights come on in the palace. There’s nothing but the labored sound of my own excited breath.
I twist my body sideways to slip through the narrow opening, turning and pressing my hands against the barrier from the other side. Grinning in triumph, I glance briefly toward the palace. The windows are still dark; the air remains quiet.
A step back and my feet hit springy earth; two more and the waist-high grass tickles my fingertips. Pivoting deliberately from the palace, I begin my trek through the grass toward the trees. I’m at least a hundred paces from the edge of the forest, and I’m blind until I reach it.
I can’t risk lighting a torch in full view of the palace, but I don’t enjoy wandering around in the dark toward a forest full of gods only know what, so I pick up my pace and take off at a steady jog. Arms out in front of me, it’s several minutes before my hands hit scratchy bark.
Sighing with relief, I wrap my arms around the tree’s trunk and rest for a minute, my heart pounding in my chest. I’m so close to freedom I can taste it. The thought of being away from this place nearly tears a sob from my throat, but I swallow it down. There’s still so much ground to cover. Too much to celebrate just yet.
I edge my way further into the forest, carefully toeing the ground so as not to trip and fall. I have to make sure I’m far enough in before I light any torches. The light will go a long way to speeding up my journey, but not if it alerts someone to my presence here.
Once I’m satisfied I’ve wandered far enough, I drop to my knees, searching the forest floor for a thick tree limb. I have no idea if Shadow Realm trees even catch fire, let alone burn up, but the ground is littered with them, and I can always discard one for another until I’m beyond the veil and have the moon and stars to guide me.
Finding one twice as thick as my wrist and long as my arm, I tuck it between my legs and gather a bundle of moss into a little pile. Striking my stone against the dull metal coin until it sparks, I shift my body to shield my work from the wind.
Once, twice, a third time, until finally a shower of sparks falls onto the moss and catches, glowing steadily in the dark until a small flame dances in the center. If I was after feeding myself, I’d add twigs and sticks and branches until I had enough of a fire to keep warm and cook, but I don’t need that much light or heat tonight.
Dipping the tip of the tree limb into the flames, I hold my breath, waiting for it to light. If this doesn’t work, I’m stuck in these woods until the sky lightens enough for me to see the direction I’m going. And that won’t give me nearly enough time to follow the river I’ve marked on my map to the veil.
When the bark catches, I release my breath in a whoosh, glancing back toward the palace. I can’t see it from here, but it’s bathed in darkness, and I am now ringed by light.
Shoving to my feet, I push further into the forest to put distance between myself and the palace. The silence all around me is almost as unsettling as the endless dark. There should be animal noises—the hoot of an owl, the scurry of a fox—but there’s nothing. Only my shallow breaths and the occasional pop and sizzle of the torch.
I tug the map free from my pocket, spreading it open with one hand and smoothing it against my thigh. The River Axan curves like an L, according to Nevon, which means as long as I’m walking away from the palace in this direction, I’m sure to run into it.
Once I find it, I only need to follow it until it becomes shallow enough to leap across the rocks Nevon says are there. His story was meant to be a cautionary tale about a demigod who tried to cross the river to bargain with Thieran to save his lover. On the last rock, the demi slipped and fell and was pulled beneath the surface by the Shadow Realm’s river guardians. Never to be seen again.
All I heard was there was a way across the river and back to Acaria.
Pushing ahead, I keep a close eye on the torch in my hand. The fire doesn’t appear to be burning the limb down too far. And isn’t that handy?
If not for being held prisoner here, I might have found the Shadow Realm far more interesting, might have liked to explore it more thoroughly. Except maybe Videva. Unsure if my parents might be there, toiling away with the other souls, and too afraid to ask, I thought it best to avoid it completely.
My body grows weary, my feet aching as I continue my journey. With no stars to track my progress, it’s impossible to tell how far I’ve gone. Am I walking too slowly? Is this the right direction? Will I just wander aimlessly in circles, as the stories claim?
I stop short at the sound of what might be rushing water, clearing my mind and straining my ears. There it is. The faintest sound, like a babbling brook. It’s difficult to orient it in such utter darkness, but it sounds like it comes from ahead of me, and I pick up my pace.
I would happily walk for years if it meant I could get away from this place, away from Thieran. The God of Death haunts my dreams in ways I wish he wouldn’t. I’m eager to put time and space between us, maybe find a good, strong man at some distant tavern I can take to bed. Sate this desire coiled tight in my belly I should not feel and drive the King of Shadows from my thoughts forever.
The sound of the river grows louder, and my face splits into a wide grin. It babbles over rocks and laps against the banks. If it’s dancing over rocks here, that must mean I’m not far from the shallow patch.
And that much closer to freedom.
Chapter Eighteen
