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Roman crossed his arms over his chest. “Because it always is. He’s the one taking advantage of my baby brother.”
Luca rolled his eyes, but he was grinning. “You’re like a broken record. He is not taking advantage of me, nor has he ever. Besides, we barely fight. Largely because Sal gives me everything I want without question.”
Roman nodded in satisfaction. “As he should.”
“Between the two of you, not to mention Abel, Morrigan, and a few others, I’m ridiculously spoiled,” Luca uttered, pressing one final key before spinning his chair around to face Roman once more. “It’s running. And we’re getting off track. There’s nothing wrong with my relationship. There’s no need to beat up my fiancé. I was referring to you. I want to talk about you.”
Roman didn’t like the sound of that at all. “Why?”
“Because I’m worried about you,” Luca revealed. “I know this whole Godfrey thing is wearing on you. Plus, you had a certain tone when you mentioned Armando.”
“I know I’ve been a moody bastard lately. But things will get back to normal as soon as Godfrey is dead,” Roman assured his brother. He’d make sure of it. “And there was no tone.”
“There was,” Luca shot back.
Roman narrowed his eyes on the little pissant. “Not.”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Ci.”
“Non.”
Luca threw his hands up in the air, growling, “Roman...”
Roman looked away, knowing what Luca was referring to but not wanting to go into it. “It’s not important. Finding Godfrey is.”
“I agree. Finding him is a priority. And that’s what I’m doing. The program is running automatically now. It will alert us when it’s done. We have time to talk about whatever feelings Armando’s call brought up.”
Roman groaned, his head falling into his hands. “Luca, the last thing I want to do is talk about my feelings.”
“Tough shit,” Luca replied, unphased. “You used to make me talk about my feelings all the time. Turnabout is fair play. Start talking.”
Roman considered simply walking away, but knowing Luca, he would jump on his back and cling like a spider monkey until Roman gave in. It had been a while since he’d shared a heart-to-heart with his brother. He started talking. “Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if Armando had been born before my father. He wasn’t a terrible uncle. He was under my father’s thumb, of course. Everyone was. He took orders and followed them to the letter. He didn’t ask questions, and he never talked back. He was a good little soldier and a loyal second-in-command. But he was also an okay guy. He wasn’t an asshole to me growing up.”
“And that makes you sad?” Luca wondered.
“I guess,” Roman admitted. “Sad and mad. Because I shouldn’t have any good thoughts or feelings about anyone in that horrible household.”
“Why shouldn’t you?”
Roman shot his brother a look that said he was a moron. Luca ignored it with practiced ease. “I’m serious, Roman. Why aren’t you allowed to hold onto good memories?”
“Because they’re all lies,” he spat harshly. “Every single memory I have before I left that house is tainted. They’re covered in blood.”
“Not every memory,” Luca corrected him gently. “It’s okay to think about your uncle and not feel hate.”
Roman rubbed his temples before digging his thumbs into his closed eyes. “No, it isn’t. He knew what my father was doing to our mother. He condoned it.”
“And that is horrible. Unforgivable,” Luca stated without hesitation.
Roman dropped his hands to his sides. “Exactly.”
“He didn’t know about my fate,” Luca continued. “But if he did, do you think it would have made a difference?”
The truth made Roman feel weak, but he still said it. “Yes. I believe it would have.”
