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"How was that?" I ask, slipping from her, and she whines. Chuckling, I lie on my side, pulling her down with me. We face each other, her eyes heavy as she smiles.
"That was not good."
I lost myself at the end, probably going too hard for her. My heart clenches, wondering if I hurt her. I've never been with someone who wasn't experienced. I open my mouth to apologize when she pushes my chin with her finger.
"It was perfect. I can honestly say that I will never forget that."
I huff out a breath, scowling at her. "That wasn't very nice, angel. I thought I'd hurt you."
She smiles lazily, then presses her lips to mine. Pulling back, she tangles our legs together.
"You wouldn't hurt me. I trust you."
As her eyes fall closed, a pulse echoes through my chest, wrapping around my heart and squeezing. I'm completely fucked when it comes to this woman. And I don't care one bit. She's mine, and I'll do whatever it takes to keep her by my side.
Twenty-Four
Aelia
Weeks. It's been fucking weeks and we still aren't anywhere closer to dealing with everything. People are still languishing in the Pit. Others are going missing. And Dante keeps dragging me to various events, telling me to wait. The only thing I've done so far is make the transfers. I conceded to Dante by lowering the deposits, but I've been slowly increasing them.
Jenkins hasn't noticed, though it may be because of all the other shit going on. He still hasn't said anything about another Auction. The extra council meetings are a dead giveaway, yet I'm not about to say anything. I may have discovered a newfound power within the Pit, but that doesn't extend beyond those concrete walls. At least he's left me alone since he's so busy.
I glare at the bathroom door as if I can burn a hole through it straight into Dante. I sigh, bracing my hands on the counter. It's not his fault. None of this is. He's not responsible for Grant cornering me every chance he gets, whispering threats in my ear. He's not to blame for me refusing to leave the Guild, even though he's told me several times he'll get me out. He's not at fault for the fact that I haven't had sex in weeks either.
I've been making excuses why I haven't jumped his bones since the last time—too much shit going on, he'll start demanding it, he wouldn't want a repeat. They're all bullshit. I'm not ready to admit that it's because I'm too terrified of my own feelings. I don't know if I'll ever be able to give myself completely over to someone else. At least not in this place.
"Are we in a bad mood again?" Dante's voice jolts me from my thoughts.
I was so lost in my own head I didn’t hear the door opening. I turn away from him as my cheeks blaze. He'll probably be able to read my mind in the curve of my cheekbone or something like that. Then again, not saying anything is eating me up inside.
"Did something happen? Was it Grant? I'm going to fucking kill him," he says, coming up behind me.
"I'm fine." I'm not. "It's not a big deal." I think it is.
"It is, so just tell me," he grumbles, which only pisses me off.
I swing around, bracing a trembling hand on the counter. Apparently, I'm not the only one in a bad mood. He's glaring at his feet, arms crossed over his chest.
"Fine. Let's get into this then."
His head pops up and he scowls, gesturing for me to continue. The words stick in my throat, threatening to choke me. I hate feeling like I don't know where I stand. The ground constantly moves underneath me and before I know it, I'll crash and burn.
"Well?" he snaps, then shakes his head. "Sorry. I just want to know what's going on. You've been avoiding me all week. I don't like it."
A week ago, Grant hauled me into my closet, pushing me onto the blankets still balled up in the corner. I thought he was going to force himself on me, but he ended up just screaming in my face. He left bruises on my arms, and while I tried to hide them from Dante, none of my clothes have long sleeves. Dante didn't even ask me about them, though.
"I'm taking all the risks." The words tumble from me without a thought. It wasn't what I was planning on saying.
"I'm not diminishing your role in this, Aelia, but you're not the only one taking risks."
"And yet I don't see any of it. You gallivant around, flaunting your money and me. There aren't any hazards for you. The worst that will happen is you'll flee in the middle of the night. And I'll be left here. Alone," I snarl. He opens his mouth, but I glare at him until he snaps it shut. "I'm putting my life on the line. Which honestly isn't that big of a deal. If they kill me, so be it. I don't exactly have anyone waiting for me to magically appear."
His nostrils flare, jaw ticking. "You think I would leave you here? You think I wouldn't care if you died?"
"I'm saying it doesn't matter either way," I cry, waving my hands. "That's not the worst that can happen to me. And the fact that you don't even realize that, after everything you've seen...it's fucking ridiculous, Dante."
Blood drains from his face and the scowl drops away. "I won't let that happen."
