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“I don’t like how you treated me when I first arrived here. I didn’t come to be a servant. I came to be a wife and mother. You’ve never stood in the way of me being a mother to your children, but you didn’t treat me as a wife until you found out I was expecting. And then overnight you change and expect me to adjust, and it’s hard to trust you now. Why would I think you could ever care for me with the way you treated me when I first arrived?”
George listened in silence. When he realized she was finished, he said, “When you arrived, I was still in mourning for my wife. Every time I saw you, it made me think of her, and for that I’m deeply sorry. I should have treated you as a beloved, valued wife from the start, but I just couldn’t force myself to do so.”
“You should have said that in your letter! The entire way here, I fantasized about you loving me from the moment you saw me. You wouldn’t even look at me. Yes, I was naïve, but it took you days before you really acknowledged all I was doing for the family, and then we took a walk, made love, and it was all over. Do you have any idea how dirty that made me feel?”
He closed his eyes for a moment and then nodded. “I thought I could get past thinking of Heather every time I walked into the house, but I wasn’t ready at that moment. I shouldn’t have made love to you then, and I should have talked openly about how I was feeling, but how do you tell a woman you’re rejecting her because there’s no love left inside of you to give her?”
“Then why are you suddenly acting as if I’m really your wife now, when I’m expecting? It makes no sense at all!”
“The day after you told me you were going to have my child, I had a heart-to-heart with Heather. I know she wasn’t really there, but it felt as if she was, and it seemed as if she gave me permission to love you as I loved her.” He shook his head. “Whether that makes sense to you or not, it’s what happened. And I do love you, Jessica. I just had to let myself feel that way.”
“And I’m supposed to trust you’re telling the truth and not planning to toss me aside again when you feel like it later?” Jessica’s heart had yearned for those words from him, but now that she had them, they were nearly impossible to believe.
“I wish you’d believe me,” he said softly, “but I know it’s too much to expect.” He shook his head. “As soon as I allowed myself to start having feelings for you, I knew I loved you. You are an amazing mother, and I’m proud to call you my wife.”
She sighed. “I want to believe you. I’ve been waiting to hear those words. I know I love you, but you just haven’t displayed any sort of love for me.”
“I know. I’ve tried, but I know it was too little too late. All I can say is that I’m thankful for the time to get over Heather’s death, but now that I’m over it, I love you with all my heart. All four of my children love you. Sally would rather you held her than me.”
“Only because she’s gotten more used to me since I’m the one with her all day. Same with Joe.”
“Nancy goes to you with her troubles instead of me. And she wants to be part of whatever you’re doing.”
Jessica shook her head. “I love the children. I have since the day I arrived. That’s not in question here, and their love for me isn’t in question. I do what they need, so they love me.”
“Seeing you with them makes me love you. Seeing you without them also makes me love you. You’re exactly the woman we needed in our lives. The children love and respect you, and believe it or not, I do as well. I haven’t mistreated you in over a month. Don’t you think it’s time you could start trusting me?”
“Are you sure you love me?” she asked, her voice soft. “If I let myself believe and you change back to who you were when I first arrived, then I don’t know how I’ll be able to go on.”
“I’m sure I love you. I’m sure I want to sit on our porch swing and watch our children and grandchildren play while holding your hand. You are so much more than I ever expected in a mail-order bride, and I thank God every day that you’ve come into my life.”
“Really?” she asked, needing confirmation once more.
He covered her mittened hand with his own. “Really. I hope you’ll be able to forgive me for the way I treated you when you were first here. I do love you, Jessica.”
And her tears started to fall. “I love you too, but I’d given up hope on you ever loving me back.”
His arm went around her, and he pulled her closer, kissing her head. “I was attracted to you from the first moment I saw you. I kept praying you’d be ugly, and I wouldn’t develop feelings, but they came much too quickly.”
“Not for me,” she said wryly, and he laughed. “Santa came a little early this year.”
“He did?”
“He brought me the love I’ve been desperately praying for and needing. Thanks for making me talk it all out with you.” She frowned. “Do you want to go to the diner? Mary Sue said their food wasn’t nearly as good as mine. There’s plenty of chicken and dumplings.”
“We’re going to the diner. I never had the chance to court you properly, and this will be the start. I hope you don’t mind, but I will insist you continue to sleep in my bed during our courtship process.”
She smiled at that. “Are we good now?” she asked.
“We couldn’t be better,” George said, grinning at her. “And I’ll do what I can to show you I love you every day of our lives.”
“I couldn’t ask for more than that.”
Epilogue
Jessica gave one final push and the second twin arrived. “A boy and a girl,” Mrs. Daugherty said.
Jessica lay back against the pillows, absolutely exhausted. Her labor had been faster with the twins, but it had also been harder than the others. “That makes six of each. Who could ask for more than that?”
