AllFreeNovel
Share Us
CHAPTER ONE
zoe
Kitchi Falls, Finger Lakes, New York
“Where is the strong, independent woman I’ve come to know and love?” Charlee asked.
We sat, as we often did on a fall Saturday, on the deck of our favorite winery overlooking the lake.
I lifted my glass of cabernet, swirled it around as I watched its legs fade, and thought about how to answer. “Truthfully? That Zoe has been brought to her knees by a man. Embarrassing, but true.”
Charlee and Natalie looked at each other as if I weren’t there. Their “what will we do with her” look made me alternatively embarrassed and sad at the same time. I was the hype girl. The perpetually positive one. Bring the vibe up, not down. That was my specialty.
Until this weekend.
“Which is precisely why we’re here,” Charlee said, thanking the wine bar attendant for her new glass of pinot. “To pull you up off those knees and remind you that how someone treats you is more important than how much you like them or even how they make you feel.”
“Speaking of being on your knees,” Natalie said, “I’ve been meaning to ask. You said you really enjoy giving Lucas blow jobs, but I have to admit. . . I’m not a fan. Ethan, unfortunately, is. So, when we’re done convincing Zoe that Erik is a piece of shit, can we talk about my conundrum next?”
That did get a laugh out of me. Likely Natalie’s intention. Because we’d talked about blow jobs, or her lack of enthusiasm for them before, this wasn’t any sort of breaking news.
“Like I said. . .” Charlee stifled a smile. “It helps if you’re actually turned on by the idea of pleasing him in any way, shape, or form. And honestly? You’re not as much turned on by Ethan as you are accepting of him because he’s the least worst boyfriend you’ve had in recent years.”
“And likes nature,” Natalie pointed out.
As a conservationist, that was basically the clincher in any of her relationships.
“Definitely a winner,” I said, appreciating the distraction, which was working. “Let’s talk about Ethan instead. Maybe I’ll forget Erik ever existed.”
Except, a vision of him walking into my apartment in his scrubs, looking all sexy and doctor-ish, a gleam in his eye even after a long shift. . . the man was primed twenty-four seven. Sometimes I thought he might have a sex addiction he liked it so much and so often, but I wasn’t complaining.
He was the guy every girl chased. The nurses loved him. His patients loved him.
I loved him.
“Oh shit, we lost her,” Charlee said.
“I’m so sorry,” I said, downing the wine in my glass and putting it on the table in front of me. The fire table took away a chill that warned of colder weather to come. “I hate this. I hate myself like this.”
“Listen.” Charlee crossed her legs, the large Adirondack chair swallowing her small frame. “You know what a mess I was when Lucas came back,” she said of her current boyfriend, who’d returned to Kitchi Falls after ten years in the military. “You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about. It’s your turn. But I get it. And you need to give yourself a little bit of grace. You just broke up with a guy you’ve been dating for more than six months. It’ll be an adjustment.”
“He broke up with me,” I clarified.
Two nights ago, Erik never showed up to dinner. When I texted to ask where he was after I waited more than a half hour, his return text was the death knell I never expected.
So sorry, I completely forgot. Late shift.
Listen, Zoe, I don’t think this is going to work out.
Of course, I asked him to call me, which he couldn’t do because of work. A full twelve hours and a lot of tears later, we finally connected. Though I almost wished we hadn’t. He was distant. Cold. I’d say unexpectedly, but the more I thought about the past few weeks, the signs had been there. I just hadn’t wanted to admit to them.
“Minor detail,” Natalie added. “But Charlee’s absolutely right. Cut yourself some slack. He was a part of your life for the last six months. It’s going to take more than forty-eight hours to get used to the idea. One thing I don’t want to get used to? Empty wines,” she said, standing and grabbing my glass without even asking.
What would I do without my friends?
For someone who had precious few of them growing up, I sure did get lucky in adulthood. “Thanks, Nat.”
Charlee smiled sadly at me, likely because I looked absolutely pathetic. The fact that I’d survived nearly ten moves in my life thanks to my career-military dad but was taken down over a man?
