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Mom: And your brother?
I wonder if this is the entire reason she messaged me in the first place, and consider ignoring her, since I believe if she wants to talk about Andries she should be messaging him directly, but it would be nice to get a second opinion on everything. I trust Mom a lot more than Dad right now, and since I’ve been planning on trying to get her to come to the wedding anyway, I figure that asking her for advice isn’t out of line.
So, instead of the simple text just saying, ‘Fine’ that I was going to send, I erase it and call her instead.
“Hey, Mom,” I say when she quickly picks up.
“Hello, dear. It’s so good to hear your voice!”
I smile almost immediately at the compliment. “You too. Hey, so, weird question… is Dad around or are you alone?”
“No, I’m alone in our villa.” Her voice becomes more serious. “Why are you asking exactly?”
“I just need someone to talk to, honestly, and Dad has been so difficult and laser-focused on messing with Andries that he’s impossible,” I inhale deeply, figuring out what I want to say. “As you know we’re here for Andries’s bachelor trip, but some information has come out about––”
“The scandal with the dancer and the drugs at Bat Rouge, yes,” Mom interposes, finishing my sentence. “I already know all about it.”
This doesn’t exactly surprise me, since the information is everywhere, but it’s unfortunate that she has probably already formed her own opinion on everything before I’ve had a chance to convince her that Roxanne can possibly be innocent. My mother has a more open mind than my father does, though, so maybe not all hope is lost.
“It’s awful,” I concede. “From the surface, it seems like Andries doesn’t know what’s going on yet, but I can’t believe that’s true with how prolific the news about it is. Dan and I think Roxanne should be the one to tell him, but she’s panicking and won’t do it, and now we’re torn on whether to tell him ourselves or give her a little bit more time.” In a moment of vulnerability, I let out a shuddering breath, wishing Mom was here with me. “I just don’t know what to do.”
Mom takes her time to answer, causing a short silence between the two of us. “Since you’re being so kind to Roxanne and giving her time to tell Andries herself, does that mean you think she isn’t involved?”
“Knowing Roxanne a little better now, I believe there is a chance she’s been in the dark this whole time. I can’t say for sure, but that’s just the impression that I get.”
Mom hums on the other end of the line thoughtfully. “You do know how serious this all is, right? This is a way more serious investigation than they’re saying in the mainstream news. Roxanne may be taken to court for drug trafficking charges. If she’s found guilty she can spend up to ten years in jail. Compared to all of that, I’m barely worried about the wedding at all anymore. Instead, all I can think of is that your brother is planning to commit himself to someone who may be in prison for a decade.”
Shock ricochets through me. I can’t even fathom what my mother is telling me right now. I expected Roxanne to be fined and be lambasted in the media, but a decade’s worth of jail time? It just seems so over the top. Does Roxanne know how serious this all is? She hasn’t given me any indication that all of this can possibly go so horribly, and if she doesn’t know the gravity of the situation, then it’s no wonder she doesn’t want to tell Andries yet. Or maybe it’s the other way around, and she does know how bad this might end up being, and she just can’t face those facts and is terrified of how Andries will react. Would he wait for her for ten years? She’ll be forty-six by the time she’s released…
The answer that I know in my heart is sobering… if it was something he believed Roxie was innocent of, he would wait for her without a second thought. But for this? No; he wouldn’t wait for her, at least I don’t think so, and I’m terrified of what that might mean for his mental health.
“Are you there, Elise?” Mom asks, and I realize how long I’ve been silent, deep in thought.
“Yeah sorry. I-I just didn’t know all that. The jail time and all.” My mouth is dry, and I swallow, trying to relieve it. “Mom… do you think Dad or Karl, or even the two of them, could have something to do with this? We both know how focused Dad is on splitting up their engagement. It’s just so odd that this dancer would do something so egregious while Roxanne is away when they’ve never had any trouble like that at the cabaret before.”
I hear my mother take in a breath to speak, but then she doesn’t, as if she’s reconsidering her answer. “Your dad has been quite private about his mingling with Karl. I have no idea unfortunately…”
She sounds genuine, if unsettled by the idea of it. “Is there a way you can find out, though?”
Her sigh is long and full of discontent. “Elise, no… you know I can’t do that. I’m trying to stay out of all of this as much as possible.”
“Mom, this is your son’s happiness we’re talking about, for fuck’s sake!” I complain, my exasperation with all of this tip-toeing around peaking. Mom gasps at my cursing, but I don’t let that stop me from making my point. “You know Andries. He was already depressed and a huge mess after their breakup the first time. Do you want him to do something even worse if Roxanne goes to jail?” I almost want to tell her that he’s been musing about a long-dead poet’s suicide, but I think it might be too much on her all at once. “If we can prove Dad or Karl has got something to do with this, we canhelpher. For all her faults, it’s the right thing to do. I don’t think Roxanne has done anything wrong, honestly, and we all have our faults, you know.”
“Well, I…” Mom starts, but then she trails off, making an incredulous noise before laughing slightly. “I don’t really know what to say to all of that. I guess I didn’t realize that you were rooting for your brother and his fiancée now.”
“I am,” I tell her firmly. “I’m trying to be my own person and not just a mirror of what Dad wants from me. I root for my brother’s happiness now, Mom, and you should do the same.”
When Mom speaks next, the disbelief in her voice is joined by something new––respect. “I will see what I can do.”
A wave of relief comes over me, but my life has been so up and down that it’s muted in a way. Like I’m too emotionally drained to feel anything fully anymore. Still, I’m glad that she’s coming around. “Thanks Mom, that’s all I can ask.”
“I know. But it’s still a lot, my love.” She sighs again, soft and maybe even tired. “I will talk to you soon. I love you, and give your brother my love as well.”
“I will, Mom. Love you too.”
I pocket my phone and fold my arms on the railing, leaning forward and letting the view over the cliffside help to clear all my jumbled thoughts. It’s so quiet out here, just the push and pull of the waves and the soft sounds of the city in the distance. Of course, my respite isn’t long, and I hear the sounds of two people walking down the walkway to meet me. Andries and Dan’s body language is more relaxed with each other than it has been in a while. Maybe this is a good sign?
When they make it to me, they both seem quiet, as if they don’t know what to say. All I’m given is a quick greeting. I don’t think Dan has spoken to him about Roxanne yet, because I think his reaction would be much more volatile. So what is making them act so odd, then?
