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I grit my teeth but stop talking just like she wants. After sticking her nose into Andries’s business when it comes to Roxanne for months now, Elise’s sudden disinterest is raising some red flags for me. She’s sworn to be on her brother’s side, but what if she’s being tight-lipped because she’s still helping her dad on the down low, hoping that the longer Roxanne waits to talk to Andries, the angrier he’ll be? It’s a nefarious plot, but not only is Elise stubborn, but she’s also one of the smartest people I know, and I wouldn’t put anything past her.
Still, I want to trust that she’s had a change of heart. This reaction of hers is making it hard.
Just before I start to try and convince Elise again, Andries and Johan walk out of the villa and back onto the terrace from wherever they were. Johan shakes Andries’s hand and pulls him in to slap his shoulder before the men separate, and Johan disappears around the side of the house––presumably to talk to everyone else before the night is over. Andries makes movements like he’s going to come join me and his sister, but I stand, approaching him instead and cutting him off.
“Hey, man, can we talk in private for a minute?” I ask, already taking his arm in my hand and steering him away from Elise.
“Uh, sure?” Andries replies, coming with me willingly but with a confused tilt to his mouth.
I lead us both to the balustrade, as far away from listening, nosy ears as possible. “This was a great farewell party,” I tell him, easing into the conversation. “Well done.”
Andries waves his hand in the air. “You know good and well Roxie and Lili did most of the planning.”
“But I’m sure they needed some of your input to keep them from going overboard, right?”
He chuckles. “You aren’t wrong there.” To my surprise, his expression then turns sober. “But I know good and well that you didn’t bring me over here to talk about party planning.”
“I just wanted to check on you. Are you doing okay, Andries?” I ask, dropping any sort of animosity I may have been feeling toward my best friend. I need him to be open with me, so in turn, I have to be open with him.
“I’ve had better days,” he admits. “Why are you asking me this now, though?”
“I know something is clearly bothering you. I have to ask… are you really mad just because of my relationship with your sister, or is there something else affecting you?”
His gaze sharpens. “What makes you ask? Is there something else that should be affecting me, Dan?”
I don’t answer immediately, processing his question. Roxanne has me fishing for information from Andries because she’s afraid he’s testing her trust in some way, but… what if he’s doing the same with me right now? It isn’t false that, being his best friend, the right thing to do would be for me to tell him the truth about anything that might affect him, like the Bar Rouge scandal, but I also want to give Roxie time to do the right thing herself. It puts me in an impossible situation, and I truly hope he is just being clueless.
I consider just telling him that Roxie owns the cabaret, and keeping the news about the dancer and cocaine incidents to myself so he can find out through his own research, but knowing Andries, he will push and push until I tell him everything. The worst part is that Iwantto tell him. It’s eating me up inside to lie by omission to my best friend, but Roxanne deserves the chance to own up to her mistakes.
“I don’t know, Andries, you tell me. If something is weighing on you, you can always count on me, even if we haven’t been on the best of terms.”
A server floats by, and Andries grabs the drink he ordered, which is something that looks nearly identical to the whiskey currently in my hand. He drinks deeply, the ice clinking in the glass, before responding. “After breaking my trust, you still think I’d come to you. Really?” He’s clearly being sarcastic, and it grates on my nerves.
“You’re being an asshole, but I get it. Look, all I’m trying to say is if anything is troubling you, no matter how humiliating it is, I’m here for you, alright?”
Andries creases his eyes at me suspiciously. “Humiliating, you say? Such as?”
Frustration wells in me, and I know I have to give him a few crumbs of information or he’s not going to take the bait. I feel like I’m so close to getting him to fess up that I can’t stop now. “Well, anything regarding your and Roxanne’s union, for instance. I know it was a big deal for you that she used to work in the sex industry, so it’s natural for there to still be friction between the two of you. If anything arises out of that, I want you to know I’m here to support you.”
His expression softens and he reaches out, laying one hand on my shoulder and squeezing affectionately. “Well, thanks, man, I really appreciate it, but you don’t have to worry about that. She left the industry before we got back together.”
Something about his tone of voice rings false, and it’s putting me on edge. I feel like Andries is just playing a game with me, and that it’s a trust test to see if I will tell him the truth about the cabaret. That would be the right thing for a best friend to do, right? I’m aching inside to tell him, and the idea that he might be totally genuine and in the dark about what is happening makes it even worse somehow. If Andries trusts me, and I fail him like this…
I open my mouth to tell him the truth, the power and guilt of it almost overwhelming me, but then I see a flash of emerald green from the front of the terrace. Roxanne has her hands clasped in front of her nervously as she looks for her future husband, and the words die in my throat. I can’t betray her… fuck… I’m going to be screwed no matter how this plays out now.
“I know she left, but I know that some of those feelings might still remain, so again, if you need to talk…” I flick my eyes over to Roxanne again, who hasn’t spotted us yet, and lean closer so I can whisper to Andries, “even if you need me to keep a secret from her, I can if you want me to.”
Andries smiles again, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Okay Dan, I hear you. I appreciate you letting me know.”
With that, my best friend walks away, and with him, so does all my energy. After the emotional distress of fighting to keep this secret from him, I’m exhausted, and even the allure of beautiful Elise still sitting with her legs crossed at the table isn’t enough to make me want to stay. My eyelids feel heavy, just like my heart, and I really, really just want to go to sleep.
I make my way inside, waiting until Andries isn’t looking to stop and kiss Elise’s cheek and tell her goodnight. She seems bewildered that I’m not staying, but I just can’t. My tolerance for all this drama is at its limit.
I tell Andries and Roxanne goodnight as well, Roxie’s eyes burning into me as if she’s trying to see if I’m hiding any new information from her. I’m so torn on what to do. Should tell Andries the truth to show him how much I care about our friendship, or keep quiet and let Roxanne handle her own dirty work and give the two the best chance to save their engagement? The truth is going to cause serious problems between the two of them, and the best way to mitigate it is for Roxanne to do the talking herself.
The last thing I want to do is fuck their relationship up a month before their wedding, but this scandal at Bar Rouge can’t be ignored. If he’s testing my loyalty, though, I’m failing miserably, and every minute I keep my mouth shut is another minute that I’m continuing to fail.
I stop and turn back one last time before going inside, and, just like I suspect, Roxanne is still looking at me. I frown, trying to tell her without words that the clock has almost run out. I can see her gulp, and I know that at least part of my message has gotten through to her. She knows I can’t keep this up forever, at least.
