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I swallow, hating the thought of that. “How do I prevent it?”
“You may not be able to, but I’d urge you not to overexert yourself.”
“Not much I can do with a tube in my cock,” I mutter.
He pats my shoulder, and it feels like a scolding. “The nurse can take that out if you like.”
I look past the doctor at the woman with the calming voice, realizing only now that even with asking her to talk to me to calm me down, I never asked her name. I’m such an asshole.
“I’m not the nurse,” she says with a kind smile. “I’m only an aide.”
I frown. “Don’t diminish your role in helping people.”
She gives me a weak smile but doesn’t say anything else.
“I’m going to prescribe you some laxatives and vitamins,” the doctor continues.
“I don’t need laxatives,” I mumble, slightly embarrassed to even be discussing it with him, despite him being a doctor, because she’s in the room.
I’m supposed to be a manly man, and manly men don’t need shit like laxatives and fucking vitamins.
“You do,” he assures me. “Drink as much water as you can manage. Your body has been in survival mode, and it’s going to take some time to bounce back. As soon as the catheter is out, I’d urge you to try and get up and start moving around. Just use caution. You’re not going to be able to do what you think you can do. You have great movement, and I’m sure Sunshine here is responsible for that, but there’s still a certain level of atrophy in your muscles. Use caution. She shouldn’t be responsible for picking you up off the floor.”
I’d argue with the man, tell him I’m as strong as ever, but the muscle testing had the power to wear me out completely.
“Got it, Doc.”
He nods in my direction before gathering his things and leaving the room.
Her eyes dart to the door before settling back on mine, but she doesn’t say a bad word about the doctor.
“He called you Sunshine,” I say, my voice weaker than I’d like.
“That’s my name,” she returns.
“Anyone ever tell you with a name like that you should smile more?”
Her cheek twitches. “I smile all the time.”
“Fake smiles.”
Her lips form a flat line.
“It doesn’t meet your eyes. I may not remember the last five years, and I have no clue who the president is, but I know a fake smile from a real one. When I first opened my eyes, you were shocked, but then the smile you gave me was real. Every one I’ve seen since has been fake. What makes you want to fake your smiles?”
“Do you need anything?” she asks, ignoring my question.
“I’m going to make you have real smiles, Sunshine.”
Her cheek twitches again.
“I’ll be right back.”
The door doesn’t close all the way behind her before a large man steps into the room.
“Sir,” I say as he steps closer.
His smile is genuine. “You remember me?”
I shake my head. “I recognize you. I was told I work for you, or that I worked for you.”
“You always have a place with us, Bishop. Always.”
I nod, really cherishing his words because other than my mom and the others in my platoon, I haven’t belonged in many places.
“Do you want to come home?”
I should probably know the answer to that question, but my response is delayed.
His idea of home isn’t the same as mine. I know he’s referring to the place Cerberus operates, but that’s not my home. I couldn’t even tell you what the building looks like.
My home is back in Oklahoma with my mom, and from the memories I do have, I haven’t been back in far too long.
“The doctor said I’d be weak for a while,” I tell him. “I think I may need to stay here and work on regaining my strength. Where is Rivet, I mean Angeline? Where is she staying?”
“Their house is almost done. I imagine they’ll move out of the clubhouse by the end of the month.”
I look past him, anger threatening to bubble up.
“She’s with someone from Cerberus?” Betrayal hits me hard. I wasn’t good enough, but she came to where I am and ended up with someone who is supposed to be one of my teammates? I’ve heard a lot about Cerberus, but it was never mentioned that they were prone to stealing another man’s woman.
“Rivet is Cerberus,” he explains.
“What?”
“She was hired on a couple of years ago. She’s engaged to Cannon Griggs. He’s the son of our vice president Shadow.”
“Cerberus hires women?” I ask, latching onto that part rather than focusing on the explanation of who she’s promised herself to.
“We’re a very progressive group.” There’s a smile in his voice. “She was our first female hire.”
Something akin to pride fills my chest. Rivet and I have had more than one conversation about Cerberus. She had always said that’s where she wanted to land after the Corps, but she was never hopeful because at that point, they hadn’t hired females.
