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Regardless of what my body wants or craves, I will leave Jude if given half the chance.
Leave behind all the death and madness.
Jude bends down and captures my lips.
The kiss is gentle and sweet.
And still believing he’s about to leave, I let myself fall into it.
Let myself have this little moment.
Rubbing my palm up his chest, I selfishly let myself forget how we got here.
I don’t think about how fast everything happened.
I refuse to acknowledge that this isn’t love or anything close to it. That his pursuit of me, his want and need of me, is simply sick and disturbing obsession.
Savoring the texture of his lips and the sweet taste of his quickening breath, I convince myself this is all perfectly normal.
Because it’s the only way I can exist like this.
Stuck on the razor’s edge.
The way my body responds to him will forever baffle me, but I don’t try to fight it.
I don’t fight the heat spreading through me or the tingles he creates when his skin simply touches my skin.
Knowing it’s safe to do so because he has to leave.
Until he begins to deepen the kiss.
Groaning into my mouth, his weight comes down on top of me, sinking me into the bed.
His tongue thrusts past my lips, hungry and far too desperate.
Again, I choose to be selfish for a few more moments.
Kissing him back.
Kissing him like I fucking love him and need him.
But when his hand goes to my breast, I rip my mouth away.
“Don’t you have to leave?” I pant.
The corners of his lips quirk up and his eyes gleam. “In fifteen minutes.”
He tries to suppress his glee over my surprise, but I know I’ve been tricked.
Like a stupid, vapid rabbit, I walked myself right into his trap.
Tightening the snare around me, he captures my mouth again. Taking advantage of my shock and thrusting his tongue past my open lips.
His hand squeezes my breast and his hips rock into me. His stiff length rubbing against my clit.
Jolting, I shove hard at his chest.
When that doesn’t budge him, I resort to biting his bottom lip.
