“I’m really not sure how I feel about claws.” I flexed my hands, that were now partially covered in black fur, my fingers having shortened and blunted a bit like a cross between a feline paw and a human hand, and sharp, retractable claws extended as I curled my fingers. “If nothing else, if I can’t shift back, I’ll shred silks.”
“I’m sure they’ll shift just like when you use shadow boy’s powers.”
I tried to scratch my nose and nearly an eye out. “Bleh.”
Ash laughed. “Well, if you hadn’t enjoyed yourself so much yesterday…”
Sticking my tongue out at my cousin wasn’t the most mature response, but it made me feel better.
“You’re just jealous—” I cut myself off and sighed. “Sorry.”
Ash shrugged. “We can’t go back right now regardless. Even if there is a way for me to be able to get home.”
I tilted my head. Something about the way she said that made me think she had an idea. “What’s up?”
Ash frowned. “Too early to say. Let’s just focus on getting Baz.”
“You’re staying here, right?”
“Yeah. So is Casey. Robby is going with you all, though.”
I huffed out a breath. The guys had wanted to leave me behind, as well. I had mixed feelings, but staying relatively safe in the palace didn’t feel right, either.
“We’ll keep an eye on Baz for you, while you’re gone.”
“Thanks, Ash.” I flexed my paw hands again, not sure if I wanted to cry or laugh.
“When are you leaving?”
“Technically, we’re leaving now. I’m not sure how I feel about this.” I couldn’t drag my gaze away from my paw hands. Tears were definitely winning the war in my head right now. Though I had no idea why this, suddenly, was hitting me so hard. It wasn’t like I hadn’t dealt with so much already, but nothing had changed me like this. Well, shadow walking was arguably similar, but it felt different.
“Hey.” Ash shifted to my love seat and put her arm around me. “It’ll be okay.”
“It’s just so much.”
She leaned her cheek against the side of my head. “It is a lot, Ember. It’s crazy. This world shouldn’t even exist, and now we’re stuck in the middle of trying to save it. But, it’s also wonderful. We’ve now ridden in airships, traveled on magical horses, and all sorts of other cool stuff.”
I didn’t point out all the scary things that had happened, too. She knew. She’d been there for some of it.
“Okay.” I pushed away the tears.
“Focus on your hands being human hands,” Ash said. “Picture them in your mind. Strong from a lifetime of aerial, short fingernails from the same, callouses from the lyra, peach skin.”
“I do not have peach skin,” I protested.
She actually giggled. “I know. But it is still mostly winter pale.”
“Pale and peach are not the same.” I had no idea why I was stuck on that all of a sudden, but it was easier to focus on than everything else.
Instead of answering, Ash squeezed my shoulders again. “Give it a try.”
I sighed again, but did as my cousin said, focusing on the way I remembered my hands normally being. It took a minute, but feeling the dream essence curling through me kept the panic away long enough for me to convince my hands to revert to their normal, human shape.
“See, I knew you could do it.” Ash patted my arm and stood. “Now, let’s get you down to the stables and on your way.”
Though it was possible I could have used the shadow powers to transport one or two of the guys, I thought three was more than I could safely do, and Nic couldn’t take others with him. So, we were going to ride. Horses to the border, then hopefully the wolves would take us the rest of the way.
And, because of the nature of the dream lands, none of us were sure how long the journey would take. That was just the way of travel in a realm created by dreamers.