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“Get the fuck out,” he snaps at me. “Family business.”
“I’m not going anywhere until-”
He turns and reaches back at me, one hand grabbing as if he’s just gonna push me out anyway. I slap his hand away, and then make a grab of my own for contact. “You’ll get the fuck out, or I’ll kill you!”
“Try, asshole.”
Knox looks at him, then me, then gets his hand in between us to break up what’s about to go down. “Go, Kai,” he says, as he shifts Dragon back to the front. “Don’t push this. I’ll get her to text you when I find her.” He’s serious, and from what I’ve already seen, his calm demeanour lets me know this is the final time he’s gonna ask nicely. “GO!”
Grumbling, I open the door and slam it hard behind me. Doesn’t take more than a second or two before the Mustang is long gone and all I’m left with is smoke from the back wheels. I look up and around, at least knowing where I am, and start making the walk back to my place. I phone her a few times en route, but she doesn’t answer, and after a while, it just goes straight to voicemail rather than connect at all.
By the time I’m back at mine, I’m a ball of exhaustion and fury. I swipe straight for the Jack Daniels and start downing it, about ready to get lost in my own head rather than deal with any of their crap anymore. The music gets ramped up, and I spend the next however long drinking myself into a bottle and not giving one fuck about that. Images of her start replaying through my mind – real fucking vicious ones with that hand on her back. Then her killing someone, and then her fire and Dragon’s rage trying to hold back. He barely did. I didn’t either, did I? Nearly killed someone with my hands. Would've done, too, if she hadn't got there first.
The empty bottle is slung to the ground, and I hover by the cupboard. Gun in there. I’ll use that next time like she did. Easier. Quicker. I reach in and dig under the blankets for it, letting it settle in my palm like it’s been built for me. It’s all so easy to be that guy, to turn nasty as hell and just get on with whatever the fuck you want in life. No holding back. No care for what the law says or does to try stopping you. Doubt they even care about the law. They’ve probably bought most of this city, and what they haven’t they just kill.
Another bottle of liquor picked up, and I sit at the table and keep drinking. Gun gets planted in front of me, and I spin it on every next swallow of booze. Get lost in that, too. I’m just watching it, staring at the metal as it goes round and round. It’s like a slow running tornado, and every time I hit it again, it spins more violently. Reminds me of what I’ve seen today already. What I’ve done, too. Who I’ve been with even, and what I’m gonna turn into if I don’t calm the hell down.
Hammering starts on my door. I scowl and look back at it, then keep staring at the gun instead. I’m not in the mood for people. Certainly not any of them. And definitely not with this gun in my hand. Might be Dragon to come try threatening me with some new fucking issue he wants to drag me towards, and then what? I’m gonna kill him, too?
“KAI!” Mariana. “Open the door!”
I get up and go over, wrenching the door wide open. She walks straight past me into the middle of the room, pacing the hell out of it. I watch her do it, not knowing how to handle anything. She’s still a ball of fire – red-rimmed eyes and tense as hell – and I’m not far off the same kinda rage I’ve barely contained. And then I just don’t give a damn about any of it.
Three steps and I’m in her face, one hand grabbing for her neck and my mouth taking what I deserve after the kind of day I’ve had. She stiffens at first, tries using that frustration she’s all vented up with, and that just makes me more desperate for her.
My hands roughen up, and she’s turned and pushed exactly where I want her.
“No, wait,” she says. Fuck that. Damn dress gets rucked up as I spin her away from me towards a wall, and my teeth grate on the back of her neck for purchase. “Kai. No. I need to-”
“Shut the hell up.” I push her at the wall some more, levering my belt open and reaching for my dick. “You take this and behave. No fucking talking. No thinking.” She gasps as I get my hand between her legs and gives one last try at turning to face me. “I’m gonna get real damn pissed with you in a minute. Stay still.” She doesn’t. She moves sideways, making a swing into me so she’s head on. I don’t want her face. For once, I just want to fuck without thought about who she is or what I’m doing with her or for her.
A sharp right hand plants across my face. “I said no. Not like this. Never like this.”
“All this shit today and you want me to try sweet as fucking light? Grow up.”
“Don’t you dare!” she snaps. “You’ve got no idea what I’ve had to endure and-”
“What you’ve had to endure? Fuck you.”
She backs up a step away from me. “What?”
“I’ve been beaten on by your brothers, threatened, made to watch a fucking sick show that your family provides for more sick fuckers, and then I’ve damn near killed someone. To protect you. If I want a fuck from you that’s meaner than usual, you’ll give it to me. Get your ass back here.” She blinks at me, like she can’t believe what’s coming out of my mouth. Yeah, well, this is the kinda guy I’m turning into, for her. She can damn well get used to it. “Take the dress off. Now.” She looks at the door. “You go out there, and you better believe you’re not coming back through it unless I make you.”
“I don’t understand. Why are you being like this?”
“Dress. Off.”
“I killed him. Me. To protect you.”
“Don’t need you’re fucking protection. You should have stayed out of it. Take the goddamn dress off.”
“Fuck you.” Yeah. Whatever.
I keep staring, ready to get this confusion out of me.
Takes her a few moments, but she starts stripping slowly. Her eyes stay trained on me the whole damn time, like she’s not going to back down from that, at least. “Is this what you want?” she asks, as she pushes her panties down and throws them to the side angrily. “Some obedient little whore at your beck and call?” At this point in time, yes. “I’ll never be that. Never.”
“You will tonight. I deserve it. I’m damn well entitled to it.” I watch her shift her hands to her hips and glare. Not tonight, little lady, and my own scowl must prove that because she swallows whatever comeback she’s thinking about. “You're gonna get over here and suck my dick, and after that, you’re gonna get fucked until I’ve forgotten where I’m heading for you.”
