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“It’s okay, Judge. I don’t care about that.”
“I know you don’t, but for so long, you’ve had so much sadness, and I wanted it for you.”
She shrugs a shoulder. “I’ll survive.” She looks down. I know why. She’s thinking about Theron. Because he may not survive. The best doctors worked on him, but, as Santiago said, two close-range shots did a lot of damage. Too much, maybe.
“He’s strong.” I touch her cheek with one finger and lift her face up to mine. “And stubborn as hell.”
She laughs at that. “Why do you think he did it? I mean, he must have known he could get hurt… or worse.”
I consider this. I have been thinking about it for hours. Why did he do it? Sacrifice himself for a brother to whom he came asking forgiveness and received none. A brother he tried to mend his relationship with, but I wouldn’t give him the chance. A brother who did not even invite him to his wedding.
“He’s been wanting to apologize to you. He came to see me, but I wouldn’t let him go near you.”
She nods. “He’s made an impression on Solana.”
“Well, when he wakes, we’ll tell him that because, weirdly, after she stomped on his foot and probably caused some damage with that heel of hers, he hasn’t stopped asking about her.”
We both chuckle.
“Masochist,” she says.
“Let’s go up to our room.” I stand.
That makes her pause, then nod. She slips off her stool and slides her arm into mine. We walk side by side up the stairs and to my bedroom. When we turn on the lights, we are both surprised to see it’s been decorated with hundreds of roses and candles, although they’re unlit, and crimson petals on the bed.
“This must be Georgie. Probably with Lois’s help,” Mercedes says.
“Let’s just go to sleep. I’ll ask Lois to remove everything tomorrow.”
“No, don’t. We’ll take them to Theron. It’ll be nice for him to wake up to a cheery room.”
“That’s a good idea.” Neither of us mentions that he may not wake up at all.
We undress each other, and I brush the petals off the bed before we slide in side by side, husband and wife, and sleep. Mercedes curls into me, pressing her belly against my side. It’s not how I expected to spend my first night with my wife in my bed, but this is our reality.
We’re alive. Unhurt, mostly. Theron wasn’t so lucky. So I close my eyes with a thank you on my lips as I tug her close and ask the gods who have been so cruel until now to grant me one wish. To let my brother wake up and walk out of that hospital himself. And when he does, I promise to take him back. To forgive and finally forget all that’s come to pass. To thank him. To try to understand him.
25
Mercedes
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Judge cups my face, his eyes searching mine.
“Yes.” I wrap my arms around his waist and give him a light squeeze.
He still doesn’t look convinced, but enough time has passed, and I’ve grown tired of being separated from him far too often these last few weeks. Our marriage didn’t come with the honeymoon we’d hoped for, and when Judge hasn’t been at the hospital with Theron, he’s catching up on work.
It’s clear he still carries guilt over what happened. The lingering tensions between the two brothers before Theron almost died certainly doesn’t help. And while I thought I’d be the last person ever feeling indebted to Theron in any way, I can’t deny the truth. He hurt me. He terrified me. But he also gave me the greatest gift anyone ever has. In a split-second decision, he undoubtedly saved Judge’s life, as well as that of our babies. If it wasn’t for Theron, I could have been spending my honeymoon at my husband’s grave, mourning his loss rather than planning our future together.
It's an admission that rocks me to my core. And admittedly, I still feel a rush of fear every time he leaves the house. Or if he doesn’t come home exactly on time. If he takes too long to text me back. I know these things will get better in time, but right now, I can’t help it. I want to be near him. I need to be near him. I can’t be at ease unless I feel his presence beside me.
“You look tired,” Judge observes, his thumbs brushing over my cheeks. “Perhaps you should stay home and rest.”
“Says the man who hardly sleeps.” I reach up and stroke my fingers through the back of his hair. “I’m tired because I’m growing two tiny humans inside me. But I’m also tired of resting. I want to go with you.”
He still seems reluctant, and I know why. While I’m desperate to have him near me as much as possible, he’s desperate to keep me at home where he knows I’m safe. It hasn’t escaped me that every time he looks at me, he carries the burden of additional guilt for that too. In some way, he still feels like he failed to protect me even though he’d done all he could. I’ve told him again and again that what happened couldn’t be avoided. Vincent was determined, and even if someone had thwarted his attempt that night, he would have found another time and place. I understand that, but I think it will take Judge time to come to terms with it.
“This isn’t how I’d imagined us spending this time,” he says. “But I want you to know that when this is over, you’ll get your honeymoon. You’ll get everything you want.”
