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“No it’s okay,” she replied, holding my gaze. “Something happened in my life that I do not like to talk about. It set me back and made me doubt my worth and ability to move forward with my life. I worked on myself for those two years to try and remember the person I was and who I wanted to be. I would like to say it only took two years but, in truth, I am still dealing with it now.”
My heart was pounding in my chest as she spoke every word with so much honesty and pain. I could see the anguish of whatever she had been through behind the cold mask that she was wearing. And it did something to me. I felt something. A need. Not a need to kiss her or fuck her or claim her like I had been having. A need to... protect. The room fell silent at her confession but she never took her eyes off mine. I watched as the gold speckles danced against the vibrancy of her bottle green irises and the room faded away to nothing but her eyes. It was only mamma’s clearing of her throat that broke our challenging stare and we both looked away awkwardly.
“I am so sorry sweet girl. That you have been through something difficult. Life can be very unforgiving sometimes. As a family we also went through something difficult a few years ago,” she started, and my warning glare snapped at her.
“Mamma,” I growled, but she just met my gaze with a dismissive glance.
“We lost my beloved Vinny and the children’s father in a brutal attack.”
I slammed my fist down on the table, making everyone jump. There was one thing I could not talk about right now. Not in front of my younger siblings or Olivia and that was my papi.
“Non qui. Non adesso,” I commanded her to not talk about this. She lowered her head and sank back in her chair. I instantly felt like an asshole. Looking around at the awkward and sad faces of each family member made my rage triple. This is who I had to be. This heartless prick. The one that had to carry the weight of responsibility. The weight of our papi’s death so they could live the lives they wanted to.
I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing as I tried to calm the storm raging inside my head.
“Don’t tell me I have already missed all the drama?” Maximus’ deep Italian voice echoed into the room as he strolled in casually. I leaned back in my chair, glad for the distraction, until I saw his leering eyes fall upon Olivia. He looked her up and down hungrily and licked his lips, not even attempting to hide his interest. I clenched my fists on the table, one around the stem of my wine glass. “And who do we have here? A guest?”
“This is Liv. Sani and Raya’s new nanny and teacher,” Elle introduced them as he took her hand in his and raised it to his mouth like the slimy bastard he is. I squeezed the glass tighter as his lips drew seconds away from touching her skin. I was about to smash the glass over his head but Olivia quickly pulled her hand away.
“Nice to meet you,” she said politely. His eyes glistened with intrigue and he smiled back at her.
“I’m Maximus. Cousin of this rowdy lot!” he smirked, pulling his chair out next to Sani. I sighed in relief that he was away from her. I really did not want to have to kill him. He was my favourite cousin and best Capo.
The food came out shortly after and the rest of the meal went by without too much drama. Olivia held her own amongst my opinionated family and I sat back and watched all her interactions with interest. I noticed that when she genuinely smiled, she had an adorable, small dimple in her right cheek. When she felt uncomfortable, she always looked down at her hands and picked at her thumb nail. I also noticed that instead of jewellery she wore nothing but an elastic hair tie around her wrist. I wondered if that was out of choice or whether she just didn't own any jewellery.
“So what do you think, Gio?” Elle’s voice invaded my thoughts and I reluctantly turned my attention to her. She was giving me that hopeful look that could only mean one thing. She wanted something she couldn’t have.
“About what?” I lifted my wine glass to my lips and took a sip of the sweet white wine from our vineyard in Tuscany. Her face scrunched up in irritation.
“About the trip to France? The art exhibition with the Uni?”
Mamma sat back in her chair and let me take the wheel on this as usual. She never liked being the bad guy. I sighed and rubbed my face. “You know the rules, Elle.”
“But it’s a Uni trip! It’s part of my education! It’s only for a few days!” Her voice rose higher with each sentence and I scratched my chin, giving my hands something to do. I hate it when people argue with me. My family knew that better than anyone.
“Elenora. My word is final. You can go if you have five of my men with you at all times or you don’t go at all.”
“You are so insufferable! What other twenty-three-year-old girl has to have five bodyguards follow her around a museum while she looks at a few paintings? Can’t you see you are ruining my life? I am suffocated!” She shouted, losing her temper. Us Buccinis were all known for our fiery dispositions.
I closed my eyes briefly to keep control of my own rising anger. She was suffocated? If only she could walk a mile in my shoes. At least she gets to follow her passions. She gets to go to university (which might I add is a fucking ball ache of organisation and safety procedures on my part) and pursue her dreams. She gets to have dreams full stop. When I opened them, she had chucked her napkin onto the table and stormed out the room, cursing at me in Italian.
“Perhaps, I should take the children up to bed now?” Olivia’s small voice came from the side of me as she looked across at mamma. Mamma merely nodded and kissed Raya and Sani goodnight as I watched Olivia walk out with them both. My jaw ticked as I realised I wasn't the only one watching her go.
“Max. She is an employee and off limits,” I snarled through gritted teeth and his head whipped round to me with amusement.
“She doesn’t work for me,” he teased, and I gave him a deadly glare. He may be family but he knew when not to push me and this was one of those times. He nodded once and lifted his glass to his lips as I felt my mamma’s blazing glare on the side of my face.
“You seem to have a soft spot for the girl Gio,” she taunted, and I sighed heavily. I was really hanging on by a fucking thread tonight.
“You told me she was under my protection while she worked for us. That is all I am doing,” I ran my hand through my black hair as my body felt tight with tension. I only released it this morning and now I am wound up like a fucking knot again.
“Are you sure?” mamma probed and I stood up from my chair abruptly. I can’t deal with this shit any longer.
“Yes, I am sure, mamma. I do not know what game you are playing to entertain your pass time but I promise you that I will not be a part of it. Unlike some of us, I have a business and a family to run and I do not have the luxury to plot schemes and play games. So, whatever it is you are doing, leave me out of it,” I thundered down the dining room and out the door, but I heard my mamma call after me.
“You cannot RUN a family, Gio! That is not how this works!”
I growled in rage as I stormed up to my office to pour myself something stronger than wine.
