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We’ve been living in a bubble here, a sort of fantasy where all my dreams are coming true, and if we don’t leave, I will convince myself this is my life now. But a feeling of dread settles in my gut, and I know we aren’t staying. We have to go back sometime.
I stand up a little straighter when I see him walking back over—I don’t know why. Maybe I’m steeling myself for whatever news he has.
“I’ve got to go back,” he says.
I nod. What else can I do?
“Okay.”
“You don’t have to come with me,” he continues.
I know he’s being nice, saying I can stay on the vacation for another night, but it cuts a little, as if he’s saying he doesn’t want me to return home with him.
“No, I don’t mind. I can get back to Ivy and help your mom out.”
“Okay.” We stare at each other for a moment, and he nods in finality. “Okay. We should get our stuff.”
“Yeah.” The awkwardness is back, and I hate it. I hate the way things are about to be again. “Hey, can you hold Waffle?” I ask the camera guy closest to me, and he grabs the leash.
I follow Simon inside, and we are quiet as we ride the elevator up and enter the room. I pack my bags and watch Simon out of the corner of my eye.
“So, is something wrong?” I ask as he stuffs another shirt in his bag.
“I’m supposed to be doing a consult for a little girl who was scheduled for a month out, but they moved it up to today.”
“Is she okay? Something wrong for them to move it up?”
“Just taking precautions. I’m happy though; this is what I wanted.”
“I see.” I feel bad for only considering my feelings when there’s a child who needs Simon’s help. “I’m glad we aren’t far away.”
“Me too,” he says, and then we continue packing.
“Will the airline let you take Waffle with us?” Simon asks.
I panic. I stop and pull out my phone to search the guidelines on flying with pets. I breathe a sigh of relief as I read them.
“Yes, as long as they can fit in a crate and underneath the seat in front. He’s small enough, don’t you think?”
“Let’s hope.”
I watch him again, drumming up the courage to ask him the question that’s been on my mind. The one that I haven’t wanted to ask, for fear of ruining our time, but now that it’s coming to a close, I need to know.
“What are we going to do when we get home?”
“What do you mean?”
“Between us. I feel like things have … I don’t know … changed maybe?”
Simon looks up at me as he zips his bag, his jaw working back and forth.
“Nothing has changed,” he says.
I turn away, my traitorous eyes instantly filling with tears at his blunt dismissal.
“Okay,” I say, and we grab our bags.
I don’t look back as we exit the room. I don’t want to remember anymore.
