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“Not happening. I’ll come with you.”
I sighed. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but can you not? Every time she mistakes you for my grandfather it breaks my heart. My heart is already a little battered today.”
He slumped back in his chair. “I’m sorry.”
I reached out for him. “No, don’t be. It isn’t your fault.” I wanted to be with my grandmother. She was my safe space. The one who’d always seen through my bravado. She saw the hurt behind the tough front I put up and she had always known what to say to make me feel better. She’d spent my entire childhood years telling me I was more than what other people thought of me. That I was worth more than a mother who rejected me, boys who dumped me, a man who got me pregnant but didn’t want a relationship. That I could be a stripper and still be a worthwhile human being.
Some days, you just needed your mom. And Gran was mine.
But Zeph was in my corner too. So I tossed him a bone. “Could you wait for me? Drive me home after?”
He leaned over and kissed me gently. “I’ll be right here. Take all the time you need.”
My heart squeezed.
I got out of the car, slamming the door behind me before I could analyze why.
I strode briskly through the maze of hospital corridors, the way to Gran’s room already memorized from my previous visits. A nurse glanced up as I entered the ward, but I raised a hand in greeting, recognizing her face from the last time I was here, and she waved me on through.
“She’s having a good day,” the nurse called. “You picked a great time to visit.”
I smiled at her and opened Gran’s door.
She beamed at me. “Lyric!”
I perched on the edge of her bed, careful not to jostle it too much for fear it would cause her pain. But she waved a hand around dismissively.
“Get on up here and give me a hug. I’m doped up to the eyeballs on painkillers. Can barely feel a thing. They’re good stuff. I’ll try to steal you some.”
I sniggered but did as she said, leaning in to gently wrap my arms around her frail body. “You seem a lot better today.”
“Christ. Must have looked like death last time you saw me then. I asked the nurse to bring me some lipstick and blush. I looked in the mirror and thought I’d seen a ghost.”
I swallowed thickly, emotion clogging my throat and tears filling the backs of my eyes. Because this was the woman I remembered. The one who was there for all my childhood memories.
The one dementia was cruelly stealing from me.
“Hey, why are you crying?” Gran squeezed my hand.
I shook my head, not wanting to tell her it was because I’d missed her so much. And I was grateful for her good days. But I knew they wouldn’t last, and I was devastated over that at the same time. Tears dripped down my cheeks as I gripped her hand, wishing if I only held her tighter, she’d get to stay.
“Is it Zeph?” she asked gently.
And because I didn’t want to upset her, and because it was partly Zeph, I nodded.
She brushed my hair back off my face, like I did to Amelia when she cried. “Oh, honey. You love him, don’t you?”
I blinked at her. “Gran, no. He’s a priest, remember?”
She gave me one of her no-nonsense looks that I knew well from my teenage years when I’d tested out lying on her. It hadn’t flown then, and it apparently didn’t fly now. “I think his profession is irrelevant at this point, don’t you? Especially since you have a leaf in your hair.”
I widened my eyes and swiped my fingers through my messed-up curls. Indeed, a leaf fluttered free, dropping to my lap. “Well, that’s embarrassing.”
Gran squeezed my fingers. “Maybe for you, but it makes me happy.”
I stared at her, wide-eyed. “You aren’t horrified I’m corrupting a priest?”
She scoffed. “You can’t corrupt someone who doesn’t want to be, Lyric. I’ve seen the way you act around him. The way he treats you. When has any man ever treated you so well? You finally picked one worthy of you. And that makes my old heart happy.”
