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I grabbed her hand before she could touch it. “Stop.”
“Tell me why.” She rubbed a firm hand along my erection. Precum wept from my tip.
In an instant, I had her on her back, her legs wide. With a single rip of my fist, her panties tore, baring her sweet pussy to me once more. I stared at her while she writhed beneath me. Then I put my lips to her ear and whispered, “Because I want every inch of you Lyric. I want you here…” I pushed my fingers inside her mouth, feeling her warm, wet tongue swirl around them. “And here.” I trailed my wet fingers down between her breasts. Over her navel and mound and then up inside her.
She moaned loudly.
I dragged my fingers back to her ass. “Here too, Lyric.” I spread her arousal all over the tight opening.
Her fingers dropped to her clit, and she rubbed herself hard and fast. “Yes! Please!”
I reared back. I couldn’t do this.
Slowly, she sat up and sighed. She was still completely naked, but she didn’t seem to notice or care. “Okay, clearly I’m not getting another orgasm until you talk about whatever is on your mind. And frankly, Zeph, I’m soaking this couch as we speak. So talk. You want me. I want you. I get it’s complicated for you, but you’re sending so many mixed messages—”
“I like dominating women.”
She shrugged. “Okay, so you’re a guy. I think we already had that established.”
I shook my head. “Fuck, Lyric. You know what I think about? I think about chasing you. You running from me. I think about the adrenaline rush of catching you, pinning you down and spreading your legs. Taking you hard and fast, and not just in your pussy, Lyric. Your mouth. Your ass. Every part of you I want to mark. I want my fingers around your throat when you come. I want to tie you up. I want you to fight me while I fuck you until you’re screaming in pleasure instead of in fear.”
The words spewed out of my mouth in a tumble of angst and anger and disgust. I hated every syllable, and I couldn’t even look at her.
“Have you ever acted on those impulses? To take someone against their will, because that’s what it boils down to right, Zeph?”
I gazed up at her. “My high school girlfriend. Her name was Annie.”
“You raped her?”
I flinched. “No. I didn’t. But I scared her, Lyric. I was young and dumb, and at the time I was too naïve to realize she might not like it, because I did. I was rough when she needed gentle. I stopped when she said no. But that’s no excuse. I scared her. She told her mom, who told mine, and then everything came out in therapy.”
She stared at me in horror. “So you joined the priesthood?”
I knew she wouldn’t understand. There was no understanding if you hadn’t been there. “I’d been getting into trouble for years at that point. Fights. Gangs. I had a temper, that often got the better of me, and a chip on my shoulder.”
“You ever hit Annie?”
“Never.”
“You ever hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it?”
I sighed. “That’s subjective, isn’t it? Pretty sure Jamie Alsen didn’t think he deserved to get the shit kicked out of him for shoving my sister, but I disagreed.”
A smile crept over her face. “You stuck up for your sister?”
I shrugged. “Of course I did.”
She settled back against the couch. “And from those actions your therapist was horrified enough to suggest you go into the church?”
“The church has been good for me. I’m a different person now. Not the hothead I was when I first came here.”
Lyric shook her head incredulously. “You ever thought that maybe you were just a dumb teenage boy full of hormones, and it wasn’t the church that saved you? Maybe you just grew up, Zeph.”
“Maybe,” I agreed. “But it’s irrelevant. I still want the things I want. You make me want them more than Annie ever did. I don’t trust myself around you, Lyric.”
“I’m naked right now and you’re doing just fine.”
I huffed at her. “My cock is so hard I’m probably going to need a surgical procedure to get it down. I don’t call that fine.”
