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Unlike what Opry said, it was just a couple days before Kingpin and Sky returned without their newborn baby. The boy was still at the hospital, but they expected to bring him home any day. I made no move to try to talk to him, of course. However, the biker popped up behind me like usual, in the dressing room. I had agreed to sing a couple of songs that night. Luckily, I was alone this time. Much like that first night we were together in the basement, the biker appeared shaken, so forlorn. Instinctively, I went to hug him.
Kingpin dodged me immediately.
I grasped my error and clasped my hands in front of me. “I heard, and I'm real sorry.”
Leaning heavily on the door frame, he carried the weight of the world. “It’s my fault. I’m to blame. I’ve broken promises that I made. I’m being punished.”
Those words from him struck me as odd. Nevertheless, I felt the same sickness in the pit of my stomach. Hearing it called out, the feeling bubbled over. We were to blame. I sucked in a breath. Although my rational brain knew it wasn’t really true, it was truer than anything in the whole wide world.
Kingpin reached out for my hand. “Yet here I am.”
Just like he darted away from me, I refused to let him touch me. “There's no way that we can ever. I can never.” I sulked. “I could never. Ever.”
“Not in a million years, I know. But I'm tired of lying, love.” Kingpin looked tired. His serious stare let me know he meant business. He was about to do the unthinkable. Unimaginable at least for him. Tell the fucking truth.
I couldn’t let him. “No. No one can ever know.”
“I promised you once Sky had the babies. You made me promises too,” he danced around our deal.
Terrified, I lied to him. After all, he’d always said it was best to. “No. Don’t mess things up for me now I have what I want. I have Hallow back.” For the most part I was lying. “I'm happy.” Most of the time I was. Maybe without Kingpin haunting me, I could truly be again. I willed myself to believe my own lies. “So don't get any ideas in your head that I'm going to wait for you again because Sky’s too fragile. Cause I don't want you. Because I haven't waited.”
“You’ve given yourself to Hallow?” Kingpin was asking if I’d had sex with him.
I lied again, “Yes.”
He didn’t believe me. “You just said the other night you kept your promise.”
“I lied. Hallow went to my doctor’s appointment with me, remember. I had to give in. He has given me so many orgasms since.” That part wasn’t a lie, though I didn’t let him go all the way.
“Eve.” Kingpin was on me like white on rice. He seized me by the upper arms, almost picking me up. His nose dropped. He wailed in the crook of my neck, “Angel. Don't do this to me. I've lost too much. I don't want to lose you, too.”
Although it pained me to do so, I fought out of his hold. “You never had me. All of this between us is just some psychological bullshit of yours. You hypnotized me during our practice sessions just like Hallow said. You’re nothing but a liar, a snake. The devil.”
“You can’t be serious,” he almost laughed but looked like he might just cry.
Pushing him away, I doubled down. “Fuck. How could I ever choose a man like you over Hallow? You don’t care about me. All you care about is money and your club. This dump. You think I’m going to be your cash cow if you can make me a star. You’re nothing but an evil criminal.” I twisted the knife. “A dirty old man who wanted to watch Hallow take advantage of a young girl like me. Hell, you’re old enough to be my father. Can’t you let me be with someone in my own generation? A good man like Hallow. Him and I are destined for one another.”
Kingpin took to a slow pace. “Paisley said you've been looking for your engagement ring.”
“That's because Hallow wants me to wear it again. I belong to him.” To add insult to injury, I pulled up my dress, showing him the property patch he hated so much. It held the scar from him trying to mutilate it. I’d told Hallow I did it. “Remember, you made Hallow and I get this. I’m his. I always have been. If you come around me again, like this, I'll tell everybody the truth.”
Raising his chin defiantly, he snapped, “I don’t care. That’s what I want.”
I’d gotten confused. “You'll lose everything you have left.” I placed my hand on my big belly. “I’ll run away, and you won’t ever see your baby. Hallow would run away, far away and hide me. I only have to say the word.”
“You wouldn’t.” That forlorn expression overtook his features.
“I’d do it in a heartbeat.” Fuck. I was hurting him. “Do you really want to lose another child? You need to leave.”
Speechless, Kingpin couldn’t leave quick enough.
Out on stage, I didn’t see him or Hallow.
I sang Lady Gaga’s “I’ll Never Love Again” as my final goodbye to the biker President.
Finally in my right mind, I would be giving my heart, body and soul to Hallow from this point forward.
Chapter 25
