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“You mean where the fuck is he?” someone in the background said. Might have been Ash, could’ve been Steve.
“Where. The. Fuck. Are. You?” That was Xane, definitely Xane.
“I just asked that.” Elspeth again.
“Mmm,” he hedged. “I’m not really sure.” It wasn’t as if he actually knew. “It’s kinda dark. All the lights went out. Where’d you guys go, anyway? You might have given me a heads up before vanishing.”
“Vanishing? What?”
“Tell him to stop fucking about and get back here.” That was Ash. They presumably had him on speaker phone. “I suppose you think it’s hilarious leaving us stranded in a fucking car park?”
Honestly, it kinda was.
“I suppose you think it’s hilarious parking up in the middle of fucking nowhere and deserting me?” Maybe it wasn’t the time to mess with them, but the attitude being levelled at him, for something that really wasn’t his fault, was seriously pissing him off. Where was the sympathy for him having been kidnapped? Not that they knew he’d been taken.
“Let me.” There followed a deal of rustling as the phone no doubt changed hands again. Finally, the line quietened. “Paul, honey.” It was Elspeth again. “Don’t piss about. Come back now, please. It’s raining. It’s cold. It’s pitch fucking black and I’m freezing my tits off standing in a car park. I have a mega mushroom burger here for you that’s still warm, and Ash says he’ll stand on the roof of the bus with you, and you can both pretend you’re surfing if you come back now. No, I’m not repeating what you just said, Steve. It won’t help.”
“Babe,” he replied to his almost sister. “There’s a slight, teeny problem with that. I kinda can’t.”
“What do you mean, can’t? No one’s gonna have a pop at you.” There was a brief silence, which he interpreted as her levelling a glare at Xane and the rest of the guys. “We just want to get out of the cold, right? Everyone gets that you were going loopy from lack of entertainment. It’s probably my fault. Should have made time to hang with you.”
“Nah, it’s not your fault. The thing is, E, I don’t exactly know where I am, and Bertha’s being churlish at the mo.”
“Churlish?”
“Yeah. I expect she’ll come around in a while.” Unlikely, but…
“She’d better, Paul Reed, because it sounds to me like you’re spinning me a load of porkies.”
“Have you stalled my bus?” Cave Troll boomed into his ear again. “If you’ve damaged my baby…”
“I’m sure it’s nothing permanent. Get back to you soon.”
He hung up.
-chapter six-
Paul “Rock Giant” Reed
Shitting, fucking, hell!
Rock Giant rubbed his eyes as he let his phone fall onto the mattress. When he eventually raised his head, Jodi was squinting at him, all perceptive-like.
“Why?” She approached, trailing the duvet like a cloak. “That was your band, right? So why didn’t you tell them you’d been carjacked?”
“Ah…” He chewed his lip sheepishly.
“Not that I was desperate for you to do so or anything.”
But she’d totally figured he would.
She settled beside him. Right beside him. Close enough he could feel her body heat, and the duvet overlapped his leg.
Paul chewed over his answer a moment or two longer. Bertha was their home on wheels, so it wasn’t like Jodi had trashed their equipment or anything. “Here’s the thing. If I take the bus for a spin, then it’s just me being a jerk. I piss a few people off, but nothing major comes of it. Whereas if you’ve stolen our tour bus and drowned it, that, that’s… well, it’s a whole different matter. A police matter—”
“You threatened me with the police.”
He scrunched his nose. “Yeah, but I’m not really that big a fan of the fuzz, and it’d be a really shitty thing to do to have you hauled off to prison on Christmas Adam. I’d feel bad if you wound up in a cell with a load of drunks. Also, I’m guessing you’re not insured to drive.”
