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“You don’t see yourself the way I see you. I’ve dreamed about you. In my dream you come to me and you’re my strong, confident Dom. You don’t need clothes because there’s no place for them between us. You understand that I think you’re gorgeous and that I crave every inch of you. I don’t care about the parts that are no longer here. They mean nothing to me. I love you the way you are today. In my dreams, you let me help you when you need it because you would never dishonor my place in your life. You give me your strength when I need it. In my dreams, you love me enough to love yourself. Maybe that won’t happen. Maybe you spent every bit of your love on a woman who wasn’t worthy of you, but I’m going to get you through the next few weeks. When you’re back to being healthy, you can choose which man you want to be. The one who hides or the man I love. Until then, sit back and relax. I’m in charge now.”
She started to move behind him. He caught her wrist, twisting it lightly in his hand.
“I can make you let me go. I can hurt you.”
She stood there calmly. “You won’t.”
Her wrist was fragile in his hand. He could break it and break her at the same time.
He let go. His will seemed to be a weak thing around her.
As she moved around to start to push the chair, he knew it wouldn’t matter. None of it would work so perhaps he should be selfish and take what he wanted for as long as she was willing to give it.
Chapter Twelve
Tiffany walked into the living room and bit back a frustrated scream. Sebastian was still sitting where she’d left him. He’d growled her way the first time she’d tried to help him back to the bedroom. Such a grouchy lion. He had to be totally retrained, so she’d turned on her heels and left his ass there.
She’d spent her time making the changes she needed to make including moving all of Sebastian’s things into the bigger of the two bedrooms. Now his clothes were hanging next to hers, all his toiletries lined up by his sink. It finally felt right to her.
She’d read his meds and planned out their meals around them. She worried she might have to force the pills down Sebastian’s throat.
Of course, just the fact that he was still sitting there was kind of a win. She’d been afraid he would roll himself out of the apartment and to a hotel somewhere.
She hated how defeated he looked, his face blank and eyes staring out at nothing.
“Are you ready for dinner? I made tomato soup and grilled cheese. I know it’s pretty plain, but you need to eat something so you can take your antibiotic.” She kept her tone even, attempting not to give him any real emotion to feed off of.
If he heard her, he didn’t show it. He simply stared off in the distance.
“Sebastian, please. I’m not going anywhere. I’m here until you’re well again and then I’m sure you’ll be strong enough to kick me out.” She stopped, looking over at him, but he didn’t turn around.
“Why did you call my sister?” His voice sounded rusty, his usual deep honey sound failing him.
She moved to the couch, sinking down to the arm, the closest she could get to him without kneeling at his side. “I wanted to know why you’re always so sad.”
“How did she sound?”
Finally something they could talk about. “Good. Angry at first, but then she called me back and she wanted to know about you. She asked a lot of questions about your career. Did you know she got married?”
He didn’t look her way, but his hand tightened on the arm of the wheelchair. “No. I hadn’t heard. Did she marry Tyler Grant?”
“I don’t think so. She called her husband Johnny. Is that a nickname?”
His lips curled up ever so slightly. “John Campbell. Good for her. Tyler was her high school sweetheart, but Johnny was her best friend. Tyler was the high school quarterback, and Ramona was nothing but another trophy to him. I hoped they would break up when Tyler went away to college, but he blew his knee out the first semester and came running home. Johnny really loved her. I’m glad she figured that out. Do they have any children?”
“A little boy.” She had to hold back the tears that threatened. It hurt her heart that Sebastian had to ask if he had any nieces or nephews. “He’s two. His name is Ethan, after your dad.”
“Good for Ramona.” He put his hands on either side of the chair, finding the wheels. “I think I’ll turn in.”
She blinked back tears as he managed to turn himself around. Away from her. It seemed like he was always turning away from her. This couldn’t work if Sebastian was telling her the truth. If he really couldn’t find a way to love her, all of this would have been for nothing.
Not nothing. She would get him through this. She would be a friend to him even if he didn’t want her as a lover.
Still, as he started toward the bedroom, she couldn’t let him go without asking the question. She needed to know. He might not answer her, but she had to ask. “Did you love her very much?”
It hurt to think that Sebastian had already found his love because she was fairly certain that she wouldn’t love anyone but him.
He stopped, the chair wheels gripped firmly in his hands. “Alicia?”
