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“My father would beat me to within an inch of my life, Adelaide. He would find any means to hurt me. Even my tears offended him. Trust me, a little boy with no true understanding of hiding his emotions will cry.”
“Oh, Andrei,” I said, once again feeling for the little boy he’d been.
He shrugged.
“Why did your father hate you?”
“I wasn’t his real son.”
“Oh?”
“My mother had an affair with one of the soldiers and the Pakhan decided my father needed an heir, and his decision was for him to raise me as his. He didn’t like it. So, he made sure to hurt me and attempted to kill me at every possible term.”
This didn’t stop my tears. It made me cry even harder.
“Do you want to be a father?” I asked.
Andrei froze and looked toward me. “Why do you ask?”
“I just … we never discussed a family. I know…” I lick my lips, and he reached for the cup, presenting it to me, and I thank him. I’m so thirsty. I feel like I could drink for days. “I heard you and Ivan talking. About us needing to start a family.”
“You heard that?”
I’m not at all comfortable with this conversation but I know it’s one that I do need to have with him.
“I figured that’s why you’ve not been using condoms. I was a virgin with you, Andrei, but I took sex ed. I know how making babies works. My parents took away my birth control when I was … you know … picked for you.” Glancing down at the bed, I force myself to look up. “Do you think I should get myself tested?”
“Why?”
“It’s been six months and we’re still not pregnant.”
“Give it time, Adelaide.”
“What happens after two years?” I asked.
“Nothing happens. Ivan would like us to have a baby within two years. Don’t worry yourself. We’ll get pregnant on our own time.”
“I’m going to have to recover from … this.” I point at my stomach as best I can. Too many movements hurt the wound near my chest.
I still couldn’t believe I’d been shot. I imagine that comes down to the morphine.
“We never had a honeymoon,” Andrei said.
This surprises me.
“Our marriage didn’t need one,” I said.
“Our marriage is the same as every other one, Adelaide. As soon as you’re healed, that is exactly what we’re doing. We’re going on our honeymoon.”
I smiled. I couldn’t help it and when I looked at Andrei, I saw him smile at me. What was going on? He rarely showed me any happiness, and it did make me a little nervous.
“You should smile a lot more,” I said. “You look very handsome.”
The morphine must be making me a little loopy.
“You’re the only one I get to smile for.” He winked at me, and my heart nearly exploded.
“What’s going on?” I asked. “You’re not like this with me. You do know I’m not Bethany, right?” I feel tired.
“Don’t say her name.”
My eyes feel so heavy.
“Everyone loves her, you know. Everyone. They love her beauty and her smile. I’m always considered the ugly one. The lame one. I’m boring.”
“Adelaide?”
“I don’t know why you married me. You must have been so disappointed in me.”
I opened my eyes and smiled at him. “I’m going to go to sleep, okay?”
“Where would you like to go on our honeymoon?” he asked.
“You don’t have to take me away. I’m fine. I don’t need any special treats.” I closed my eyes and welcomed the darkness swirling up to get me. I’m way too tired, and all I want to do is sleep.
Sleep would make everything better.
****
Andrei
Lottie made a lot of noise. She banged against the doors, cursing everyone out, and I have to say, I didn’t know the woman at all, but it even sounded like she wasn’t used to using those big words.
Ive shook his head. “You want me to take her?”
Ivan nodded. “Yes. It will keep things interesting.”
Ive looked ready to throw up. No one would believe he’d kept people prisoner before, torturing them.
All of Ivan’s brigadiers had a reputation. Ive was a deadly son of a bitch. I’m not sure where Ivan found him. There were always so many rumors surrounding our lives. There was rarely ever truth about us.
One of the rumors about my initiation was that Ivan found me on the street, bleeding, nearly at death, and I begged him to save me, to do anything to end my miserable existence. Then of course was the rumor that I went hunting for Ivan and turned on my father, to finally take over the family. All of it was bullshit. We all had our own stories to tell.
Ivan saw my potential as a brigadier, and I saw his as a Pakhan. The rest is history. There were a few more details, but they were pointless.
“What is it with you and keeping things interesting?” Ive asked. “You do know she’s the bastard daughter?”
