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“Miss college girl is too good for a side hustle,” said another bartender. I couldn’t remember her name, but from what I’d heard, she’d been here the longest.
“Shut up, Georgia,” said Sam. “Laura’s not like that.”
“Thanks, Sam,” I said. “But I can handle myself.”
I walked over to Georgia, who was slicing a lemon on the counter and picked up my paring knife on the way. She watched me as I approached, her eyes bouncing from my blank face to Sam behind me.
As soon as I was right beside her, I spun the knife and stabbed it into the lemon, in the narrow space between the inside of her thumb and index finger.
She flinched, but I held her hand on the lemon. Twisting the knife, I steeled my voice and spoke slowly. “You know nothing about me or my life, Georgia. And we should keep it that way. I’ve done things I’m not proud of, but I’m not too proud to hustle. I don’t like people talking shit about me or my friends. Is that clear?”
Staring at the knife, Georgia nodded once. But from the corner of my eye, I saw her other hand move, the one holding the paring knife. I’d anticipated the move and grabbed her forearm and squeezed. Wincing, she dropped the knife.
I locked eyes with her. I didn’t blink, just let the moment stretch between us. I could have dug my fingers deeper into her flesh, causing her more pain, but I waited to see what she would do next.
“Are we good?” I asked.
She nodded more emphatically now, so I let go, and walked away.
“Shit, girl,” Sam said when I returned to my spot beside her and dropped the knife in the sink. “You scare me sometimes, you know that.”
“Yeah,” I said, wiping my hands on a white towel. “I scare myself sometimes, too.”
I was terrified at how easily I slipped back into my past. Memories flooded my mind, ones I’d worked so hard to forget. There were spoons and syringes all over the kitchen table. I couldn’t make sense of it all. I shook my head to lose those thoughts, but they would never go away. They were always there, reminding me that no matter how far I ran toward my future, my past would always be there behind me.
“I’m taking my break now,” I said and walked away from the bar. When I reached the bathroom, I closed the door and leaned back against it. I inhaled deeply, letting my lungs fill with air, and felt the burn as I held it in. When I couldn’t hold it any longer, I released it and fell forward.
After taking a few more breaths with my palms on my knees, I straightened my spine and walked over to the mirror. My brown eyes were red all around, but I’d shed no tears. I think I’d used them up years ago. I splashed some water on my neck and arms to cool myself off and brushed my hair out with my fingers. Checking my makeup gave me a few extra minutes to compose myself until I knew I was ready to get back to work.
But when I opened the door, I wasn’t ready to see him. His grin dropped and his eyes creased at the sides. “Is everything all right?” he asked.
I pulled my lips into a semblance of a smile and fluffed up my hair. “Yes, fine.” Then, looking down the hallway, I pointed to the door at the end. “The men’s room is that way.”
“Yeah, I’m not here to use the bathroom. I’m here to collect.”
“Excuse me?”
“The bet. I won.”
“I don’t—”
He leaned forward and the smell of his cologne froze me in place. My eyes fluttered and I imagined myself taking a bath in that scent of citrus and spice.
“Laura,” he whispered. “Your name is Laura.”
I never particularly liked my name, but at that moment, his tone sent shivers down my spine. He was close enough to touch but I fisted my hands at my side.
“How—How did you find out?” I stuttered.
I never stuttered.
“I have a way of finding things out. And winning bets is sort of my thing. You never stood a chance.”
Winning is his thing. I bet it was. Unfortunately, it wasn’t usually my thing, so I knew better than to get myself involved with him.
“Well, good for you. Congratulations. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” I pushed past him but he reached for my hand.
“Wait,” he said and looked down at our locked fingers. I pulled my hand away immediately. “You owe me my winnings.”
