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“Don’t you have something to tell me?”
“Ah, nope.” I can just visualize her standing there, tapping her manicured nails on the countertop. Her name might be Violet, and she’s well kept, but she’s no delicate flower. None of us are. I glance at my nails, chipped with half the paint peeled off. I am so not put together like my friends. But I’m a pet groomer, and walk dogs for a living. Someday though, I’ll have my own pet store and grooming business. “Not that I can think of.”
“Okay, that’s it, former best friend,” she says, and I’d be worried, but I hear the lightness in her tone. That’s when I realize where she’s going with this, and I groan. “Oh, yeah, I hear that groan, and if you knew what was good for you, you’d be making those same noises with Liam Dalton on top of you.”
“I’m going to kill Emma.”
“Did you really think she wouldn’t tell me? And I’m mad that you didn’t.”
“It’s nothing. It’s no big deal. We ran into him. That’s all that happened.” Maybe that’s not all that happened. I can’t deny that I caught him checking me out. His gaze going from daisy to daisy on my dress, lingering over my breasts and legs. A warm shiver moves through me, and my traitorous nipples tighten, just like they did when he flashed me that panty-melting grin. God, no wonder women are all over him. He’s the hottest guy I’ve ever set eyes on and I really hope he didn’t notice my reaction to him.
“You should have said yes. He’d be an awesome big brother, and anything else you might need him for, and yes, I’m talking about your beaver canoe.”
The fact that she’s always called a woman’s private parts their beaver canoe never fails to make me laugh.
“Are you sure you’re not saying that because you and Jason want to meet him.” Her husband Jason is a huge Seattle Shooters fan, and no doubt is going to lose his mind over this.
“You should have said yes,” Jason screams out in the background.
Violet laughs. “That’s three against one, girlfriend, and no, this isn’t about us, it’s about you and Gavin. You know we always have your best interests at heart, and well, if you’re going to dust off the ‘beaver-can’t do’ and turn it into a ‘beaver-can do’ why not do it with God’s gift to women himself.”
“Hey, I thought I was God’s gift to women,” Jason yells.
“You’re God’s gift to me, baby.” My heart squeezes as I listen to them. That’s what I want. Right there. Couples who tease, laugh and have fun together. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t envious. I’m just too damn afraid of getting hurt, of watching another man walk out of Gavin’s life—out of mine. Although Devon didn’t walk out. I kicked him out. Too bad I hadn’t done it before he drank and gambled my inheritance away, getting physically abusive when I told him it was over. He walked out the door, taking my dreams of running my own business within the next couple of years right along with him. At least he didn’t leave with my head.
“You know his reputation, right? Would he really be a good influence on Gavin?”
I want Gavin to grow up respecting women, not sleeping his way through the alphabet. As Violet tries to convince me that he’s a player on and off the ice, but that doesn’t mean he’s not good with kids, and I could use a no-commitment ‘beaver can-do’ banging, my mind drifts. Liam might have been checking me out, and hell, I was checking him out too, but he seemed so different than he’s portrayed in the papers. Then again, I’m not a good judge of character, right?
Violet sighs into the phone. “Just tell me you’ll think about it.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Okay, I’ll stop by after dinner to pick up my tater tot.”
I end the call, and get to work on cooking, all the while trying to keep my mind off a guy who is suddenly living rent free in my head. I feed the boys, and after Violet picks Holden up, I give Gavin a bath and tuck him into his bed.
“Night, kiddo.”
I’m about to turn the light off and shut his door when his soft, tired little voice stops me.
“Mommy.”
“Yeah?”
“How come I don’t have a daddy like Holden does?”
My heart squeezes in my too tight chest, and I take a gulping breath. Sooner or later, I knew he was going to ask the question. Perhaps being at the Big Brothers organization really brought it home for him. I hover at the door and look at Gavin’s innocent face. After losing his grandparents at the young age of one, and having two men leave his life, he deserves stability, someone who’s going to put him first. But I’m so goddamn scared to get back out there. Honestly, I’m not even sure there are any good guys left.
Redirecting the conversation, I say, “Well, you’re going to get a big brother soon. That’s pretty exciting, isn’t it?”
He holds his hands up and crosses his fingers. “I really hope it’s Liam.”
“I know you do, kiddo.”
“Maybe someday he could be my daddy.”
I groan inwardly, and really wish I wasn’t thinking about him being my ‘big’ daddy, too.
