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Which meant that he had a date.
“Does Deanna actually like lobster with bechamel sauce? I had her pegged as more of a ramen and cheeseburgers kind of gal,” I said.
“Nice to see you too, Zoe. Always a pleasure.” He didn’t look up from his saucepan. “And this isn’t for Deanna. It’s for Rachelle.”
“What happened to Deanna?”
“We’re still seeing one another,” he answers, still refusing eye contact with me, bustling around the kitchen. “Deanna has agreed to an open relationship.”
“So you’re cheating on her?”
He sighed, frustrated with me, like there was no way I could possibly understand the sophisticated nature of an open relationship. “No, Zoe. She’sagreedto anopen relationship. She’s not married to outdated relationship conventions. Monogamy and whatnot. She’s an evolved woman.”
I chose to ignore that little jab at me. I didn’t like my husband dating other people, so I was obviously not anevolved woman.
“You were saying that there was a problem with Rex’s school,” he said, casually changing the topic. “Should I ask him to come out here? He’s doing his homework now.”
“No, I think he can sit this one out. I’ll just poke my head in and say hello on my way out.” I cleared. “But I just came from a meeting with Mrs. Tupper and she said that Rex has been acting a little… snobbish to his peers.”
“Definesnobbish.”
“He’s talking down to them. He’s scoffing and rolling his eyes when they get the wrong answer.”
“Hmm.”
“Our son is acting like he’s smarter than all the other kids,” I explained, frustrated.
“Zoe, our sonissmarter than all the other kids.”
“I know, but—”
“He is reading at a sixth grade level. His vocabulary is quite advanced. He’s shown promise in mathematics and complex problem solving…”
“Again, I know,” I said, getting a little huffy with him. “He’s a very intelligent kid.”
“And that’s a bad thing?”
“Of course not.”
“So he should downplay how smart he is? He should dumb himself down so the other kids don’t feel bad about themselves?” He crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow. I could practically smell the condescension coming off of him. “Is that what you’re saying?”
I groaned. “No, that’s not what I’m saying, Desmond.”
“Then what’s the issue?Youresent how smart he is?”
“No, Desmond, this issue isn’t that our son is intelligent.” I said it as calmly and deliberately as possible. “This issue is that he’s being a dick about it.”
Desmond sucked in a deep breath. I could tell he was seething, fuming mad, coming up with some biting reply. I braced myself for it.
But before he could open his mouth, Rex padded out from his bedroom, eyebrows scrunched, a concerned look on his face.
“Mom, what’s wrong? Are you guys fighting about me?” he asked, so innocently.
“No, honey,” I assured him.
“Don’t patronize him, Zoe,” Desmond warned.
“I agree. Don’t patronize me,” Rex echoed. “I’m wise beyond my years. Everyone says so.”
