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My throat feels thick, and I swallow several times to clear the nerves from my vocal cords.
“The love of my life told me I had to,” I admit sheepishly.
You can see the struggle on her face to keep her expression professional, but she rolls her eyes and smiles at the end.
“Of course he did,” she mumbles under her breath. “Always thinks he knows best.”
“He usually does,” I concede.
“THAT—” her calm voice has been evaporated to be replaced with something laced with horror and mirth. She leans back slightly in her chair as if she’s been struck with something terrible. “—is one of those things that will never be repeated outside of this room. Maybe even inside it as well. Ever. Gods, imagine!! It would go straight to his head.”
I blush and blow out my cheeks, nodding my head like a bobble toy. I rub at my chest and at that happy, floating feeling I always get when I think about him. I know my eyes go all gooey, and I’m embarrassed but unable to care at the same time.
“Truer words were never spoken.”
With every passing moment, my muscles soften, and I breathe a little easier. Maybe this won’t be so bad after all. What does Justin always say?
Paying someone to listen to you bitch is awesome.
“Forget about Justin. At least for right now. This is about you, Remi. What, if anything, do you wish to accomplish with our time together?”
It would be easier to forget about the sun than to stop thinking about my other halves, but I attempt to push his presence out of my mind. What do I want?
Suddenly it’s so easy to vocalize. We’re building a life together. Julia is having my child. Justin looks at me like I hung the moon, and Julia painted the stars around it. Yet still, I hear my father’s voice in my head, telling me I’ll never be good enough.
“I want to feel like I deserve them.”
She taps her pen on her tablet again before crossing her legs and leaning forward.
“That is as good a place to start as any.”
14
REMI
Idon’t look up when I hear the door click to my office. It's not like it's exactly a rotating door these days, and if someone had come looking for me, I would have heard the doorbell ring. Or Mrs. Jones would have announced them.
This leaves JJ, Deb, or one of the Williams come to talk strategy and attempt to coax me out of the apartment.
Only one of those people told me they'd take me out to lunch.
“You’re late, Jus—”
“Justin got called away on a school thing,” a feminine voice informs me. “He sent me as your lunch instead.”
A genuine smile graces my face for the first time in hours. I watch with hungry eyes as Julia sheds her jacket, leaving her in a black pencil skirt with a slit up the back much too high to be work appropriate and a green satin shirt that perfectly matches the panties she was wearing this morning.
Her hair is down and messy, which is surprising, as it was pinned up when they left the house, and it falls carelessly over her shoulders and down her back. She kicks her shoes off, uncaring of where they land.
“Are you hungry, Rem?” she asks as she slowly walks across the room.
I’m starving.
I can smell her from across the table—salty with a hint of tang. My mouth waters, saliva pooling on my tongue when I imagine what’s made her smell so delectable. Julia’s eyes watch when I swallow, my Adam’s apple bobbing in my throat. The way she stares and her lips tip up at the sides only makes my mouth water more.
“I have a present for you.”
She clears my desk with a swipe of her hand, shoving the entire kit and caboodle to the floor. She flinches then catches herself, giving her head a shake so she doesn't succumb to her overriding desire to drop to the floor and immediately right the mess she made.
