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CHAPTER1
Carmen looked away from the angry faces of the four men glowering at her as they stood surrounding her desk to take a sip of water. It looked like she was gathering her thoughts. Partly. It was more of a delaying tactic because she is fucking didn't know what to do.
Bands had volatile members and even more volatile relationships. Such groups came together bound by idealism and pure love for music, leading to deep friendships. Fame, however, had a way of destroying what they had worked so hard for. Lots of things sprang from fame. A member was more popular than the others, often the singer, and given more opportunities. There was also the problem of record companies dictating their sound, leading to lawsuits that dragged on for a long time. Drugs, women, men, and constantly on the road took their toll.
Seismic seemed to be above that. When Carmen first discovered them, their sound was a harsh yet melodious metal that drew blood from the ears and made the heartbeat so fast as if it was racing towards death. It was a sound that gave the finger to end proudly.
The seismic frontman was Ramiro Brandt. His angel-blond hair was up to his shoulders. His bright emerald eyes and elegant, chiseled features looked perfect whether he was onstage wearing only his sweaty abs and fitted, ripped jeans or at an award show in a tailored tux. He also played the lead guitar. Rhythm guitar and backing vocals were Lennon, the exact opposite of Ramiro in looks with his harsh, cruel-looking features and oft-unkempt iron-black hair. He looked terrifying in a leather vest and pants, and the most flattering description of him in a suit was that he looked like an undertaker. Lucas Atkinson was the bassist and also did backing vocals. He had a grim face - one journalist joked that he looked like his entire family had been wiped out in the most horrible, and just found out he had cancer in one day. He was already balding at thirty-seven and looked to be ten years older. Their drummer was Russell Leblanc, more pretty than handsome with his dark blond curls and lopsided, teasing grin that was said to melt the knickers off women. Euan Estrada, who played the keyboards, rounded up the group. He was said to be as good-looking as Ramiro, while some believed him to be more handsome. His hair was a rich, pale blond that he wore past his shoulders, and his eyes were big and soulful.
Seismic was the biggest rock band of the decade, and Carmen was determined to keep it that way. She had been babysitting these assholes early on, but the problem they had come to her for was something she couldn't fix. It made her want to throw things. Nothing was impossible with Carmen Schwartz, but the problem of Ramiro Brandt was making her question that. It had been going on for a while.
"He's been slacking off practice and getting high for days," Lennon growled, planting his vast fists on the desks and glaring at her accusingly with his pale gray eyes. "We're recording an album in three months, and that fucking twat has not turned in any material." They all wrote songs, and each of them contributed as expected. It was their way of holding off the record moguls from touching their sound.
"He tells us he's sick, but this is what he's been doing." Often calm, with a Zen-like demeanor, Euan slammed a folded newspaper on the desk and jammed his finger on the headline. Carmen winced as she read it: `Beast Bows Before Vodka' was plastered on the front page along with a photo of Ramiro passed out in front of a bar.
"I'm not saying the twat has no right to get wasted," Lennon continued, "but if he keeps this up, we're kicking him out."
Carmen paled. "Y-You can't be serious." Her blue eyes were giant pools of disbelief and shock as she stared at each of them. They all looked her right in the eye without blinking. "You can't be fucking serious!"
"Carmen, this has been going on for a year. Look, we understand that it was an awful way to lose his sister like that but come on," Russell said. "The god cursed me because you shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but Temperance Brandt was an evil bitch, and she was so demanding of Ramiro. There," he told the rest of the band, puffing up his chest as if in a challenge. He was the shortest in the group. "I said it. Temperance's a bitch, and I'm glad she's dead."
Carmen silently agreed. Temperance was Ramiro's sister. She was beautiful in a way that made the heartache and cruel in such that she crushed the spirit. Brother and sister were close, but she was a little too possessive. She sneered at groupies who approached Ramiro and cut down any woman who showed even the slightest interest. She and Carmen had had shouting matches as well. Temperance that Carmen was going to steal Ramiro away from her. Carmen didn't know where she got that idea. She was hardly the kind of woman Ramiro would look at also had never had any interest in Ramiro except professionally. Yet Temperance considered her a threat and threatened to kill herself if the band didn't fire Carmen. Ramiro defended Carmen, the only time he went against his sister.
Carmen had no love for Temperance Brandt, but that car accident was not how she should have gone. It was too quick yet still cruel.
"I disagree about kicking Ramiro from the band," Lucas said. "But Carmen, you have to understand. We're becoming a joke because of him. He's late for shows; he's grumpy and rude. He's getting drunk and high all night. I don't care what the man does in his own time as long as it doesn't affect the time for the band."
"He's right," Euan said. "We've worked too hard to lose what we have."
Again, Carmen agreed. But seriously? Did they want to kick Ramiro out?
"I understand your sentiment - "she began.
"Oh, fuck sentiment!" Lennon howled. Lucas elbowed him in the ribs. "Will you shut up and fucking listen? Go on, Carmen."
"But people have a different way of mourning. You can't kick this guy when he's already down. And may I remind you that Ramiro Brandt is why we're all in this room, living where we live, having what we have. He put up the band and discovered each of you. He wouldn't be here if you were in his shoes, telling me this unfortunate thing about kicking him out. Maybe instead of uniting in your impatience and frustration, you should be at his side helping him."
"He's not answering our calls or messages," Russell pointed out. "No, Carmen. You're the only one he'll listen to."
Carmen shook her head. "I don't know him as you do. You're his best friend! I'm. . . I'm your manager."
"Oh?" Lennon crossed his arms. "Are you saying you're no friend of ours, eh? What are we, money pots for you, then?"
Blushing, she protested, 'I didn't mean it like that - "
"Sure sounded like it."
"Definitely." Euan agreed, his gaze sharp.
"What Imeantto say," Carmen snarled, "is that I don't have the kind of friendship with him that you have. For crying out loud, you all went to college together. You were fucking roommates!" She pointed at Euan. To Lennon, she added, "He paid for your rehab!" Glaring at Lucas, she said, "He introduced you to your wife! And you - "she told Russell - "who gave you a place to live when your family cast you out because you're gay?"
"Shame on all of you,"she yelled at them as she stood up in her heels. "for coming here tomyoffice, tellingmethat you intend to stab Ramiro in the back, your friend, your friend who has fought and helpedeach of you,and then demanding that Ido your fucking dirty work!Fucking blockheads, the lot of you!"
Carmen was so furious at the conspiracy they wanted her to be a part of, of the betrayal they had been planning. A bitter taste at the back of her throat threatened to choke her.
The men had shrunk back during her outburst. They looked at each other before turning back to her. Carmen was still red-faced and fuming, her fists clenched to her sides. Betrayal. It was disgusting. It so went against her principles, yet here they were, the band she admired, asking her to destroy them. Ramiro Brandt was infuriating, and his actions of late, she had to admit, were no excuse, but neither was their decision. How could they easily forget that it was Ramiro's songs that won them awards, that he was the emotional center of their group? And they dared to call themselves his friends?
"So, uh, Carmen," Lennon said, clearing his throat. "What do you think we should do?"
