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“It’s good to see you, El,” Johan greets, his tone laced with genuine excitement, while we pad slowly but surely toward my brother and his new acquaintance.
I’m not sure if I’ve ever been in shock before, but I am now. My hands and lips are cold as I take in the impossible sight of my crush from all those years ago, now an even more attractive twenty-two-year-old man. Johan’s jaw is chiseled, his dark blond hair perfectly cropped, and just like it was at equestrian camp, he has the most handsome smile. He’s grown taller, his shoulders broader, but his face is still so open and kind that I almost feel bad that I’m so taken aback.
Johan broke my heart when I was fifteen. Until Dan came along, I had never trusted a man since Johan had all but ghosted me. At camp, I had fallen almost instantly in love with the older boy who seemed to have some sort of supernatural connection with the horses. He had made me laugh like no one ever had, and he was clearly the most handsome guy in the whole camp. Johan made it clear from the start that he was leaving for Oxford in the fall, but that didn’t stop fifteen-year-old me from falling head over heels, and being ultimately crushed when he left that September. He had promised to visit me the following summer, but as the calendar days in June, then July, and finally August ticked by, it became clear that Johan was never coming.
But now… now he’s here. Did he finally come back for me after all this time?
What a stupid thought, I chide myself.
“What’s the matter?” Andries laughs, looking triumphant that his plan to come between Dan and me has worked so instantly. “You can't say hi, El?”
Amused, Johan breaks from the group and approaches me, his arms open for an embrace. I look from him to Dan, and then back again, heart in my throat. I never, ever wanted something like this to happen. Beside me, the man I’m currently in love with, and in front of me, my very first love.
Time moves in slow motion as Johan comes to hug me in greeting, but before he can touch me, Dan is there, not pushing or being belligerent in any way, but simply standing in Johan’s way, an unreadable look on his face. Johan stutters to a stop and raises an eyebrow.
“Is there a problem?”
“I’m not sure,” Dan deadpans, holding out his hand for a handshake. “I’m Dan O’Brian. Welcome to my villa.”
Johan’s lips twist into a smile of relief, and he reaches out to shake Dan’s hand, although very briefly, before Dan leans closer to him and says, “Now, get the fuck out.”
“Dan, please,” I say, stepping in, quite shocked at his lack of manners, and I grasp his arm so he can back down. “Johan is a friend of the family.”
Dan remains just as serious, glaring at Johan as if his stare could shoot daggers. He seems to know exactly who Johan is, which is strange since I never told Dan about him.
“I’m sorry, man,” Johan starts, his tone laced with genuine humility. “I didn’t know it was your villa, Andries invited me over and I took a plane over from England and—”
“Is everything alright?” Andries has come over and is now standing beside Johan, looking inquisitively at both Dan and me. “Dan, this is Johan, a longtime family friend. Since we have a spare bedroom, I figured he could come over and stay with us.”
Despite their respectful and polite tones, Dan doesn’t seem convinced by either of them, and the air between the four of us grows thicker by each passing second.
Dan finally turns to my brother and says, “We need to talk. Only the two of us. Can we go back inside?”
Oh no! What the heck are they going to talk about? My eyes are pleading with Dan for him not to reveal our affair to my brother out of revenge or something, but Dan pays it no mind.
“Sure.” Andries just shrugs and the two of them leave Johan and me alone as they walk back to the villa.
My heartbeat is racing as I watch the two silhouettes getting farther and farther from us and then disappearing inside the house.
“It’s been such a long time,” Johan says, his tone joyful, breaking the uncomfortable silence that had settled between us. He takes a step back, making a show of looking at me with pride in his gaze. “Look at you, you are all grown up now.”
I chuckle, wishing I could have a glass of wine or something in my hand to ease the awkwardness of the moment. “You too,” I say simply, my eyes already scanning through the terrace in desperate need of a server to bring me an alcoholic beverage.
“Excuse me!” Johan seems to have understood the situation because as soon as I pivot to follow his gaze, he’s actually calling the server that is behind me, who’s holding a tray of bubbles, and takes two glasses.
“Here,” he says, handing me one. “Looks like you might need it.”
“Thank you, I really needed to have a drink.” Before I can bring the bubbly to my lips, though, Johan raises his glass.
“Well, cheers, to our little reunion here in Capri.”
I reply with nothing but a smile as we clink our glasses and quietly take our first sip. Despite his cheerful tone, I have felt rather uneasy to see him again. After all, this guy ghostedme for three damn years and then shows up here like nothing happened.
“If you don’t mind me asking…” Johan lets his words trail, as if he’s still contemplating whether to go ahead or not. “Is Dan your boyfriend or something?”
I nearly spit out my drink at his question, a wave of shock taking over me. “Uh, no,” I manage to blurt out. “He’s just a good friend.” My eyes travel up to meet his and I study his face more attentively. “Why are you asking me that, though?”
Johan takes another sip of champagne, answering with a shrug. “It’s just the impression I got. That’s all.”
