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Lainey
I groan and throw ahand over my eyes as my best friend pulls open the heavy curtains in my bedroom with the theatrical flair she’s so well known for. Who was the idiot that gave her a key to my place? Oh, right. That would be me. It’s supposed to be for emergencies, like feeding my cat when I’m away on holiday or helping me out when I lose my house key—something that’s happened on more than one occasion. It is absolutely not supposed to be used to break into my house first thing Saturday morning to stage an intervention.
No intervention is necessary; I just need to go back to sleep. In the dreamworld, everything is right. Lucas and I are still together. Lucas is in love with me, and the two of us are hanging out with Ben and Amber, who are crazy in love with each other.
“Lainey, you have to get past this,” Cass says on a sigh. “It’s been three months already.”
“I was with Lucas for two and a half years, Cass. You can’t expect me to be over it so quickly.”
“It’s supposed to be a month for every year. I’ve given you three months already. I refuse to give you any longer. There’s no point lying in bed all day while listening to Nothing Compares To You and All By Myself. It’s self-indulgent and self-pitying, and I’m done enabling you.”
Those aren’t the only songs I’ve been listening to. I found a wonderful collection of songs online called Heartbreak through the Decades. This isn’t something I share with Cass, though. She has enough ammunition for her verbal beat-down already.
“It’s a year for every year you were together, not a month,” I say instead.
“Lainey, you need to get your shit together. The only thing you do is go to work. You are still going to work, aren’t you?”
“Of course I am. How pathetic do you think I am?”
Okay, so I have taken a few sick days these past few months, but that’s because I hate my job as a checkout chick and I’d rather be writing. Not that I’ve done much writing lately...
“I don’t think you want me to answer that honestly, Lainey. Look around you. The place is a complete mess. The kitchen is full of dirty dishes. When was the last time you washed up?”
I think back, but I can’t remember.
“You’ve let your freelance work at the magazine go,” Cass continues.
“I can’t keep running into Lucas there. It hurts too much.”
“You haven’t made the revisions your editor asked you to make to the manuscript, either.”
“Because she wants me to change the whole damn thing.”
“If she published it the way it is, people would throw themselves over the closest cliff. Jesus, Lainey, it’s the most depressing thing I’ve ever read. Rings & Roses won’t publish stories that don’t have happy endings. You know that.”
I sigh, picking at the bedspread covering me. “I’m not sure I believe in happy endings anymore, Cass.”
As a young girl, I daydreamed constantly about what my happily ever after would look like. As soon as I could string a decent sentence together, I began writing about finding Prince Charming, and when that was no longer enough to satisfy my cravings for romance, I began writing fairy tales about other people. I’ve been looking for love for as long as I can remember, obsessed with romance and people who are perfect for each other. Now, however, I’m starting to think that maybe some find love and others don’t.
Cass pushes her long dark hair off her shoulders and takes a seat on my bed. “You’re not the first person to break up with someone, Lainey. Not even close. I know it’s difficult, but it’s time to let go and move on. You have other things you need to focus on. If you don’t make that deadline, Rings & Roses won’t keep you as an author. What are you going to do if you’re not writing anymore? Keep working at Dixon’s Local Supermarket for the rest of your life?”
“Dad would love that,” I mutter.
“You’re an artist, Lainey.”
“The only stuff I feel like writing at the moment is dark and depressing. According to you and my editor, no one wants to read that.”
“Why can’t you write about the woman getting over the break-up? The one who doesn’t believe in love anymore but finds a new man who sets her world on fire against all the odds?”
“But what if that woman can’t get over the break-up? What if she never finds a man who sets her world on fire again?”
Cass sighs. “You know I liked Lucas. He was a good guy, but his heart belonged to someone else from the very start, Lainey.”
I put my hand over my stomach as if she just punched me there.
“I know it’s hard to hear, but it’s the truth. You need to accept it.” Cass puts her hand over mine and squeezes gently. “This time you need to look for a man who isn’t already in love with someone else.”
“I don’t want to look for another man. I’m not ready to look for one.”
