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Once she sees what I’m holding, Lainey takes the condom from me, opens the packet, and protects both of us before moving back and ridding herself of her underwear in the most awkward way imaginable. I can’t keep the chuckle from escaping me as I grab hold of her elbow to stop her from falling off the couch.
“Shh,” she commands cutely. “I’m probably still a little drunk.”
That wipes the grin off my face.
“No,” she says quickly, seeing my expression. “I know what we’re doing. I’m not that drunk.”
I’m glad she knows what we’re doing, because I sure as hell don’t.
“You should have taken off this skirt, too,” I tell her as I pull her to me, my whole body tensing with anticipation as I feel how close I am to heaven.
“I don’t like the idea of Duncan and Cass walking in and seeing my bare ass,” she says breathlessly. “Then again, if they walk in here in a second, they’ll see me riding you into the sunset, anyway.”
“You’re going to ride me into the sunset?”
“Oh yeah,” she nods, grabbing my shoulders as I lift her hips up and encourage her to take me in.
The thought that she can’t wait to sit on me, that she’s so eager to ride me, pushes me to the edge. Lainey is completely oblivious to my problem, and the moment I bring her down onto the swollen head of my cock, I have to grip her hips tightly to slow down her descent.
“Oh my God,” she moans as she sinks onto me, her eyes fluttering closed as if having me fill her is the most decadent and blissful thing in the world.
It’ll take next to nothing to push me over. Lainey is so hot, tight, and wet around me, and when I’m finally seated in her and she begins to move, I’m lost. Her body clutches at mine as though I’m her lifeline, as though there’s nowhere else she’d rather be—no one else she’d rather be with. I look down at where our bodies join, watching as my cock strokes in and out of her every time she gets to her knees and sinks down on me. My entire body pulses and throbs everywhere; not just where we’re joined. The tingling, tight heat that encompasses, fills me, is electrifying.
“Ben.”
She’s looking at me when my gaze lifts to her face once more, her green eyes wide as she watches me. I know she’s close. She’s moving faster and growing slicker, using me to get off. It’s fucking awesome to watch.
I undo the first few buttons on her top so I can see the black and yellow bra she’s wearing before lowering my head and kissing each breast. I want to flick my tongue beneath the material and tease one of her nipples, but it’s too difficult with the frenetic pace she’s keeping.
Her hands delve into my hair, jerking my head back up so I’m looking at her. She demands my mouth straight away, riding me hard and fast as our tongues dance together. She tears her mouth away from mine at the last minute, and I watch, spellbound, as she loses it on top of me. Usually, I never concern myself with what a woman looks like when she comes—I’m too busy joining them to observe. But I can’t wrench my gaze away from Lainey. She’s never looked more beautiful, or vulnerable, or perfect with her face flushed and her lips bruised from my kisses. Her eyes are closed as she tilts her face towards the ceiling and sobs my name. I didn’t even have to touch her; she’s like fireworks lighting up as she reaches the peak of her pleasure. And when I feel her body contracting around mine, I can’t hold off for another second. I come so hard and for so long, I’m wrecked by the time she’s through milking me.
I stroke her hair as she slumps on top of me, spent. Our breaths come out in short pants, almost synchronised. I feel relaxed and peaceful as I listen to us breathe, but the peaceful feeling fades as the world stops spinning, our breathing returns to normal, and clarity takes over.
I just had sex with Lainey. And it was explosive. Incredible. Unforgettable. Probably because Lainey is a friend.
Was a friend.
The thought of walking away from her and our friendship makes me feel hollow, but I can’t see how we can continue being friends after what just happened. It would be too messy. Too complicated.
“I should get up,” I say, breaking the silence and needing space to think.
“Oh. Yes. Sure.”
With some effort, Lainey and I untangle ourselves. The hurt in her eyes as she starts working on arranging her clothes into some semblance of neatness cuts through me, but I don’t have a thing to say that will take it away this second. I quickly walk into the bathroom and do what I need to do. As I walk out again, I’m no closer to knowing how to handle this situation. But the moment I see Lainey sitting on the couch, clasping and unclasping her hands in her lap, a stricken expression on her face, I know I can’t tell her we’re not friends. I can’t hurt her like that. And walking away from her wouldn’t just hurt her; it would hurt me, too.
I might not want Lainey to be the exception to my rules for sleeping with someone, but she is. I never asked for her friendship. Never thought I wanted it or needed it, but my life has been different since Lainey and I started hanging out. She’s good for me—helps balance me out. The thought of not calling her or seeing her anymore... it leaves me feeling broken. As long as she stays a friend, and we don’t let this night change anything between us, we can keep hanging out. As long as I never have to pretend I’m something I’m not or promise things I can’t deliver, it doesn’t have to ruin everything.
“That was probably a mistake, huh?” she says finally.
I sit down on the couch beside her. “Yep.”
“I don’t do meaningless sex,” she says, more to herself than to me. “I mean, I was thinking I could, that maybe I would try it, but... having sex with a friend is never as meaningless as with a stranger, is it?”
It feels like there’s this boa constrictor wrapped around my heart, squeezing it. Lainey has never had casual sex before. I know this can’t be easy for her. And the idea this wasn’t meaningless to her...
We’re getting into dangerous territory.
“I don’t do relationships, Lainey.”
