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“Yeah.”
“Are we going to talk now? Or are you going to give me a ride home?”
Her eyes keep darting between me and the floor, and she keeps shuffling from one foot to another, obviously nervous.
Normally, I'd find her nervousness adorable, but I'm feeling nervous too, my heart beating fast and my whole body uncomfortably hot. The way she affects me has always been over the top and tonight is no different. Well, except for the fact that I'm actually going to get to act on years of pent-up lust tonight.
The thought makes my blood rush so fast I can hear the swoosh of it in my ears.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” I ask, needing to convince myself that this is really happening.
“I wouldn't have put myself out there tonight if I wasn't. The first time you turned me down was bad enough.”
“I'm just trying to do the right thing by you.”
“Funny. I never pegged you as such a do-gooder, Dylan James.”
“You bring out the do-gooder in me in a way no one else does.”
“I don't know whether to be flattered or insulted.”
“Be flattered. You should definitely be flattered.”
Her smile is tight. “So, are you done trying to do the right thing by me now?”
“I can honestly say there's nothing right about the things I've been thinking about doing to you for the past few hours.”
Her mouth forms a cute little O.
We've slowly been moving closer to each other as we've talked, and now she's finally standing within reach. The memory of how hot her mouth was on mine is enough to jerk me into action and reach for her.
“Wait,” she says, putting a hand on my chest. “I still don't understand why you suddenly changed your mind about all this.”
“Life is too short to have regrets.”
“Are you telling me that not sleeping together would be something you'd regret? Because earlier you seemed more than a little bothered by the idea of what this might do to your friendship with Austin.”
“That thought still bothers me, but I'm no longer prepared to let it stand in my way.”
“And is that because you want me?” she asks, her voice low and husky and yet kind of shaky, too. “Because you want this? Or is it because you're worried that if you don't do this, someone else you don't approve of will?”
I can't help but chuckle. “Are we talking about the big-brotherly chore thing again?”
“Please don't make fun of me.”
“I'm not making fun of you, Claire,” I say, caressing her cheek with my thumb. “This isn't a chore to me. I just need to know you're only looking for fun.”
“Of course. I wouldn't have come to you if I was looking for anything else.”
Despite the fact I should have expected her to say that, and even though it's exactly what I needed her to say, her words cause my chest to ache and my stomach to tighten. I don't understand my response, so I just accept it as one more thing Claire can do to me that no one else can – just one more effect she has on me that I don't understand.
Because of the way she turns me inside out and because of the part we've played in each other's lives for the past nine years, I know that the only chance we have of not shooting everything to hell in a handbasket is to be completely honest with each other.
“Do you remember Austin and I talking about the world trip I've always wanted to take?” I ask.
9
Claire
